


A Time for Change

by artlessICTOAN, Spellfire01



Series: Learning to Love - A Naruto Gem AU [1]
Category: Naruto, Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Crossover, Gen, Healing Body and Mind, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Other, Trans Gaara, agender characters, demiromantic Gaara, everyone is awkward dorks, first part of a series, gem au, strong naru/sak friendship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-07
Updated: 2017-06-13
Packaged: 2018-08-07 06:27:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 12
Words: 54,048
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7703959
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/artlessICTOAN/pseuds/artlessICTOAN, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Spellfire01/pseuds/Spellfire01
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p><em>The war may have been long over, but they had been fighting their entire existence, if they were going to continue living then their purpose would remain the same as it had always been. Survival of the fittest.</em><br/><br/>Thousands of years after the end of the Rebellion's war against Homeworld, a small group of rebels are trying to rebuild what's left of their family and find their lost comrades, with little success. At least until the idealistic Citrine drags home a half-feral corrupted Gem, determined to heal them, whatever it takes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> New story alert (also, super long AN alert, but it’s **important** so please do read)! So, this AU was first thought up in the wonderful mind of [Spellfire01](http://archiveofourown.org/users/Spellfire01/pseuds/Spellfire01) when she drew some super cute art of [gem!gaara](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/post/144977956818/arrives-months-late-for-the-party-the-gem-au) and [gem!nart](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/post/145018451893/my-addition-to-this-post-with-gemgaara-inspired), I became _slightly_ obsessed with it and started gushing to her about how I really wanted to write some fanfic for the AU and here we are now!  
>  This is a collaboration between the two of us, she came up with the AU, I built the overall plot for this story (the first of many) and we discussed it and built the details/world up together, I’m gonna be doing the writing (for the most part) and she’s gonna be doing all the [art](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/tagged/naruto-gem-au). That being said, Spell is responsible for the beautiful prologue in this chap, so remember to go give her lots of love!  
>   
> Just some pre-requisite stuff to get out of the way; obviously SU is still running and there’re a lot of mysteries that still haven’t been solved as of now, the way we’re writing this we hope to avoid going too deep into gem lore or anything like that (though there will definitely be some discrepancies that we’re just gonna have to shrug away for the sake of this plot), this is mostly gonna be a small-scale story focusing on the Naruto characters, none of the SU crew is going to show up outside of maybe the occasional reference and this is set like, 30 or so years before the start of SU, so any big events in the show won’t effect this story, you can just imagine that the SU guys are running around doing their thing completely unaware of anything that happens in this story. This does open up some plot holes about how they don’t notice, buuuut… *shrugs* don’t have any real answer for that, sorry, just don’t think about it too hard.  
> Also, the male Naruto chars are gonna be agender in this and use they/them pronouns, it’s my first time writing neutral pronouns so I’m 100% gonna mess up at points, just let me know if you spot any mistakes so I can fix them!  
>   
> Key of Chars (just in case):  
> Gaara = Bixbite  
> Naruto = Citrine  
> Iruka = Pietersite  
> Sakura = [Rhodochrosite](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/post/148739563518/sakura-from-my-naruto-sugem-au-click)  
> Kakashi = [Labradorite](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/post/146722937543/kakashis-design-from-my-naruto-gemsu-au-click)  
> Temari = [Smithsonite](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/post/146673275503/temari-in-my-naruto-gemsu-au-click-for-more)  
> Kankurō = [Ametrine](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/post/146462882978/kankur%C5%8D-for-the-naruto-gemsu-au-click-for-more)  
> Rasa = Pyrite  
> Obito = Brecciated Jasper  
> Sasuke = [Obsidian](http://spellfire01.tumblr.com/post/146910629358/sause-aka-terrible-angst-bucket)

Art by Spellfire01!

\---

Everything was so, so cold.

Cold and compact, they could hardly move a few inches. They could breathe within the centimetres that the substance surrounding them gave way for their lungs to expand and contract, which was something at least, but they couldn’t feel their face.

…Not normal. Something wasn’t right, not at all.

The last thing they could remember was a blinding light. The world shook and eardrums ruptured, the rush of sand that encased them at the very last moment before impact was a bright grey blur before everything went dark. The silence that followed was nearly as crushing as the amount of energy the blast drained from their fragile form, that had been chipped away at the Gem for centuries. When they gradually rose into consciousness once more, they did so with a start.

They opened their eyes slowly; the dry, frozen air hitting them the instant they cracked their lashes open made them flinch harshly, fighting the urge to close them once more in their sensitivity. It was dark, so dark that their eyes had to blink a few times to adjust to the pitch black alone.

Confusion rooted itself deeply in their mind, the first hints of startled fear and disorientation threatening to prick at the edges of their subconscious, for the land before them was filled with nothingness. Dunes upon dunes of dust, much like the kind the gem had relied on for battle stretching as far as the eye could see.

They tipped their head back numbly, brows furrowing in bewilderment to see the sky decorated with a sea of bright white stars. If this unknown land hadn’t jolted them into panic, adrenaline pulsing through their veins, they would have even deemed the sight beautiful. They had never seen anything like it.

As if sensing their desire to move closer to the vast expanse of stars, the sand shifted around them and spat them out of its prison, sending them crashing into a semi-soft pillow the desert had made, the cold biting at the bare skin of their arms, neck and ankles, its bitterness growing tenfold. With frozen joints and a dull throbbing originating from the right side of their forehead – they briefly wondered whether their gem was still cracked beyond oblivion, or if it had somehow worsened after the impact of the blast – they dragged themselves, with more effort than they felt was required, into a slumped standing position, knees bucking slightly.

Bixbite was alone.

They knew they were alone but they still had some unexplainable urge to call out in futile hope that there was a hint of familiarity here, even if familiar would be entirely unpleasant, but if there was any chance of any kind of purpose to being here…

“… Ametrine!… Smithsonite!” They called out into the desolate landscape, their voice sounding rough and hoarse to their own ears from being taciturn for so long.

No answer. As unsurprising as it was, they were still somewhat relieved about that fact.

A long, shaky exhale rattled from their dry lungs, as the near silence that filled the air still. However, the longer this silence continued to stretch, the deeper rooted their apprehension became, past the clarity of having space and quiet to think. They found themself waiting. Waiting for someone to walk up over the large dune of sand to their left, or to hear a familiar gem voice their name in the distance.

After an immeasurable amount of time, the gem’s brows started to furrow again, the calm turning stale and unpleasant when it started to sink in once more.

They were alone. No one was looking for them. No one had coaxed them onto one of the gigantic ships as Homeworld had retreated from battle, they had seen and felt the waves distorting the air as their engines fired up and Homeworld certainly hadn’t forgotten about them, because Bixbite was an essential they had created to win against the rebels-

A geoweapon. A tool of destruction created in a kindergarten. Of course Homeworld had left them, once they had fulfilled their purpose, there was no need for them to keep existing.

First confusion, then disbelief, realisation, shock, bitterness and betrayal flashed minutely across their face, the migraine hammering away at their gem beginning to pound even louder. The blast – Homeworld had tried to destroy them, left them for dead with their enemies like a bad apple left to rot.

Abandoned.

The word hung in their mind like deadweight, voices of the past and memories surrounding it screeching at them and jumping around in a disconcerting mess, filling their skull like an overstuffed pillow. They dropped to their knees, the sand shifting around them flickering between distorted shapes, as they clutched at their head with shaking hands, breathing laboured with distress. Abandonment hadn’t been something the gem had felt for a _long_ amount of time, not since-

Their hand moved to the material covering their chest, fingers twisting rigidly in the fabric over their heart; a strangled scream of anguish broke the silence and echoed through the night.

Hurt, anger, rage stabbed though them, the sand flaring in waves that matched the roller coaster of emotion they felt. The other gems, they had called Bixbite a monster. Homeworld had broken them, feared them for what they had turned Bixbite into, left them to perish on the planet that had given them life. The war may have been long over, but they had been fighting their entire existence, if they were going to continue living then their purpose would remain the same as it had always been. Survival of the fittest.

Bixbite's hand dropped to their side as they stood up heavily, hands curled into claws as their anger turned into pure rage, a sadistic grin baring sharpening teeth.

If Homeworld had thought that they were a monster before, then Earth didn’t have the slightest clue what was about to hit it.

\---

Pietersite was furious.

Not an unusual feeling for them, they’d be the first to admit they had a fuse even shorter than Rhodochrosite’s – though in their defence, they at least didn’t get violent like she did – and, as usual, the cause was the infuriating prankster who was clearly hoping to hide until the brunet’s rage died down.

Well not this time! Pietersite was going to find the little terror and give them the talking-to of their _life_ , no way were they going to give in to those shimmering puppy-dog eyes again. But first they had to find the scamp.

“Citrine! When I find you I’m gonna-”

\---

Keep quiet, don’t move and – most importantly – don’t _laugh_.

“-and then I’ll rip you apart with my bare hands!”

A tiny snort escaped the hands clamped over their mouth, Citrine’s shoulders were shaking so much they worried that their hunter might hear them banging against the large trash can they were currently hiding behind.

“And then I’ll tell Rhodochrosite that you were the one who watered her plants with ramen!”

Citrine froze, suddenly this wasn’t very funny anymore.

They had to get away, fast and silent, before they could be discovered. Careful to not knock any of the metal bins scattered around the alley, they tiptoed further away from the street and looked for a backstreet or doorway they could slip into unnoticed.

‘Crrrack’, the sound echoed through the silent alley with damning loudness, Citrine only had a second to look at what inconsiderate bit of debris had brought their downfall – _the bubblewrap! How could I have been so careless?_ – before a hand slammed down upon their head, gripping just tight enough to be uncomfortable.

“Aha! There you are, thought you could run from me did you?”

“Eheheheh, oh, Pietersite, I didn’t see you there, so, uhm, how’s your day been?” Citrine chuckled nervously, already feeling the sweat dripping down their neck.

The older gem hmm-ed thoughtfully before answering, “Well it was just fine until I came home to find my room filled to the brim with toads.”

“Oh wow, that’s, uh, a pretty freaky accident, huh?”

Pietersite gave them a sceptical look before pulling them up by their hair and dragging them back onto the street.

“Ow, hey, I can walk, you don’t have to pull, I’m coming, I’m coming!”

\---

Citrine sighed as they released the last toad into the river, their mentor had made them return every single one back to their homes – a task made much more difficult when Pietersite had left the windows and doors of their room open for the toads to hop out and all over the neighbourhood, while they tracked down the prankster. It had taken _hours_ to find them all and they weren’t even allowed to create any projections to help.

But it was now over and done with and they could relax with a nice bowl or ten of ramen.

“Ok Pietersite, I’m finished!” they called as they ran back to their home.

“You’re sure you got them all?” the brunet asked, looking up from the book they had been perusing. “It’s not a punishment if you don’t actually finish the task.”

“Yeah, I totally one-hundred percent got them all and I took them all back to exactly where I found them.”

They scanned Citrine’s eyes for any sign of deception, but after a few tense moments finally relented. Sighing deeply, they put down their book and walked over to the young gem, ruffling their blond hair reassuringly. “Ok then, since I’m sure you’ve learned your lesson now, how about we go and get some ramen?” Pietersite asked, grinning widely at them.

Citrine’s face light up – almost literally, they did tend to reflect light more when they were happy after all – and they whooped, already charging out the door to their favourite food stall down the street.

Pietersite groaned at the thought of how much this was going to cost and jogged after them.

\---

“Ahh, that was just what I needed, thanks old man,” Citrine said, contentedly putting their last bowl on the pile of nine other bowls.

“I’m the one who’s paying, you should really be thanking me,” Pietersite grumbled, swirling their chopsticks in the dregs of their own ramen, the gem beside them held out their hand expectantly, the wide grin on their face impossible to be truly mad at, they pushed their leftovers away and watched them be devoured in almost one bite, at once fascinated and disgusted at how much the blond was able to put away.

Citrine dropped the bowl onto the pile and sighed deeply, “Yeah, but if it wasn’t so good then we wouldn’t be buying it, so really Teuchi’s the one who deserves the thanks.”

“You know I can change my mind about ratting you out to Rhodochrosite any time-”

“Thanks for paying, Pietersite!”

They scoffed and rolled their eyes in exasperation, but couldn’t keep the smile from their face even if they wanted to. “Of course, but, you know, if you keep playing these pranks on everyone I’m not sure how much longer that arrangement is going to last.”

The blond scowled slightly before jumping to their feet, “It’s just a bit of fun, honestly you’re all such stick-in-the-muds – bye old man, bye Ayame,” they said, waving to the two humans as they wandered back out into the late afternoon sun. “Nobody got hurt and nothing got destroyed, so what’s the problem?”

Pietersite groaned and rubbed at the bridge of their nose, old scar tissue rough under their fingers. “That’s not the point, you can’t just keep playing games forever, we have responsibilities-”

“Yeah, finding all of our friends, but I don’t know how to find them, I’m not like you and Rhodochrosite and Labradorite! You’re all smart and strategic and stuff, I’m just good at hitting things and – before you start – I _know_ we’re supposed to protect the Earth from Homeworld too, but there’s been no attacks for like, five thousand years.” Citrine knew they were just sulking now, but they’d had this conversation too many times to count and were, frankly, sick of it.

There was never anything for them to do, the young gem’s friends were all trying their best to find their lost comrades, but they’d been doing that for thousands of years with little-to-no luck and Citrine had never found any way to help them in their task.

The only time they ever got to do ‘Crystal Gem’ stuff was whenever they heard about a gem monster nearby, which happened maybe once every few months, if they were lucky.

“I know it’s hard, Citrine and you’re just trying to keep yourself busy, I get it; but, you can’t keep doing this, the pranks are starting to get out of hand and… you acting immaturely isn’t going to bring anyone back,” Pietersite said warily, watching for any sign that their advice might set the rash young gem off, at least they were nearly home, where they could release their frustration without scaring any humans, if they needed to.

They couldn’t stop the frown that immediately pulled at their brows, but they kept their anger in check, they knew the older gem was right. “I just get really bored and antsy when I don’t have anything to do,” they admitted.

“How about this,” Pietersite said, putting one hand on the shorter gem’s shoulder as they reached for the keys to their modest, cosy house at the edge of the town with the other, “I’ll have a talk with Labradorite and we’ll work out something to keep you busy when there’s nothing around that needs a good solid punch to the head.”

Citrine chuckled and shrugged the hand off, “Sure, but it’d better be something cool, none of that ‘doing chores’ crap, alright?”

“Ha! You’ll get what you get and you’ll be grateful for it, you little brat,” they shot back, pushing open the door and stepping inside, eyes immediately scanning for their two other housemates. The sound of the TV led them to the living area.

“Yo, you guys’re back late,” the bored-sounding voice drifted up from the couch, which Labradorite was sprawled across like a cat, leaving absolutely no room for anyone else.

The blond gem snorted and jumped over the back of the sofa, landing heavily on their teacher’s stomach, taking great joy in the rush of air leaving the older gem’s lungs. “Like you’re one to talk, when have you ever been on time for anything, ya lazy bum?”

“Whu- ahem, well, there was that one time when-”

Rhodochrosite snorted from her seat at the dining table, “Don’t need to hear the end of that sentence to know you’re lying,” she said, idly changing the channel again, she didn’t stay on one for longer than a few seconds before flicking to the next.

“What, no trust in your favourite teacher?”

She raised one of her pink eyebrows, “None whatsoever, here Pietersite,” she said, chucking the remote at the brunet, “I can’t choose anything and I don’t trust the judgement of those two idiots.”

“What? You’re lumping me in with the bum? That’s not fair, we’re nothing alike!” Citrine squawked indignantly as they leaned over the back of the sofa to scowl at her, only barely registering their knees digging into the gut of the gangly form beneath them, or the groan of discomfort coming from it.

The girl snorted again, “I’m not comparing you, you’re both very different,” she twirled a lock of her short rosy hair around a finger, “you’re also both idiots.”

Labradorite barely managed to get the “Well now, I’m offen-” out of their mouth before Citrine was leaping onto their feet – still annoyingly planted uncomfortably into the older gem’s body – and pointing a finger dramatically at their best friend.

“You wanna fight?”

Rhodochrosite gave them a calm look, the hair she was playing with dropped suddenly as a flash of white light formed around her hand, quickly vanishing, leaving the gem’s signature pretty, pink knuckledusters glinting dangerously in the sunset light filtering through the windows.

The blond gulped.

“Eheheh, I mean, wanna go get some ramen together?”

She rolled her eyes and dispersed her weapon with a casual flick of her hand. “No thanks, unlike you I don’t feel the need to stuff my body full of needless organic material just for the heck of it.”

“I don’t do it ‘just for the heck of it’, I eat because it tastes great, you’re really missing out,” Citrine said, dropping back into their seat on top of Labradorite.

“I’ll take your word for it.”

With the group settled down Citrine turned their attention to the TV, while they and Rhodochrosite were arguing Pietersite had apparently switched to a news channel where a dull human was talking about something to do with economies.

“Ugh, do we have to watch this? It’s so boring,” they moaned, slumping down even further.

“It’s important to know about human culture and events, Citrine.”

Rhodochrosite snickered from her seat, “We can always spar if you’re bored.”

The blond took a few second to seriously consider it; be pummelled by the scary-strong pink gem for an hour or endure the droning voice nattering on about ‘recessions’ and ‘tax rebates’.

Hmm, tough one.

“Well, it’s better than thi-” they started, before being cut off by a sudden change in the news reporter’s tone.

“In other news, the supposed monster rampaging through Egypt has now reached Al Jizah, leaving even more chaos and destruction in its wake. The first sightings of this creature occurred one week ago, when it attacked a small village at Egypt’s southwest border, since then it had been steadily moving further northeast, apparently drawn to any area of dense population. It has already caused extreme damage to both small towns and large cities, thousands have fled the path of destruction, though as of now there’s no telling exactly how much – and how many lives – it has cost.”

The whole room was silent as they watched the grainy images playing on the screen, helicopter shots of some kind; it was difficult to see from this distance, but the huge clouds of dust as buildings toppled to the ground were terrifying, as was the shadowed shape just barely visible through them.

“We now speak to Minister of Defence, Morino Ibiki, for what this means for Japan-”

“It’s a gem, we have to go and save them!” Citrine cried, immediately on their feet and pacing around the small room.

Labradorite sat up, rubbing at their sore abdomen. “I don’t think that was one of ours,” they said, slowly.

The younger gem whirled around on them, “You don’t know that! And even if you’re right what, so we should just do nothing? Just sit here and forget about it?” they snarled, “That’s not what we do, we fight for our comrades and the Earth, we can’t just leave them alone as a monster and we have to stop them from hurting any more humans, even if they’re not one of our friends!

“Citrine, you’re being idealistic, we don’t even know if we _can_ save them-”

“We can,” Rhodochrosite said firmly, rushing to stand at the blond’s side, “my healing powers might not be enough to completely heal a corrupted gem, but we have to try every time we find one. We can do it; we just need the right test subject.”

Their teacher sighed and rubbed at their temple, “That’s not the only problem-”

“Then we’ll fix the other problems too! C’mon Labradorite, we can’t just sit here doing nothing; even if we can’t save them, even if they’re not a Crystal Gem, we have to at least keep them contained right? You’ve never been so against us trying with any of the other monsters we’ve seen, why are you so against it this time, is it just ‘cause it’s far away and you’re too lazy to get up or what?”

The air was thick with crackling energy as the two stared each other down, Rhodochrosite gripping her friends hand tightly and giving her own glare, until the tense silence was finally broken.

“We’re going,” Pietersite said, standing on Citrine’s other side and placing a firm hand on their shoulder, “these two are right, I don’t know why you’re acting so bizarrely about this, but you need to remember what it is we stand for. Freedom and compassion for all living creatures, we are this planet’s first defence against _any_ gem-related assault, that includes mindless corrupted gems too.”

Labradorite kept up their stare a few moments longer, but quickly gave in to the triple-glare being thrown at them. “Alright, alright, we’re going, but if everything goes badly don’t say I didn’t warn you,” they said, in their usual blithe tone, pushing themself to their feet lazily.

“Yeah!” Citrine punched the air in joy, they didn’t want to wait a second longer, so they charged out of the house, leaving a cloud of dust and a large hole in the thin walls in their wake.

“Hey, get back here, do you even know where you’re going?” Rhodochrosite screamed after them.

\---


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, so here’s where we start to really get into the action! Literally. It’s my first time writing a fight scene so who knows how that’s gonna go, but I’m excited to give it a try! I’m completely messing with Egypt’s geography in this, I probably should’ve done more research before I started writing but I was just so excited I couldn’t help myself but yeah, technically north of Al-Jizah there’s no desert or oasis’ (that show up on google earth anyways) and a lot more towns/farmland, though I guess thanks to SU’s alternate Earth I can just claim AR, so let’s do that.  
>   
> Monster!gaara here looks basically like the giant Shukaku transformation in the chunin exam fight, though not quite as huge, maybe like half the size more similar to the monsters in SU.  
> Enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

Dust filled the dry air, creating an unnatural haze that was nearly impossible to see through, muffled cries and distant sirens sounded from all directions, broken by the occasional earth-shaking crash of yet another structure crumbling, weakened walls unable to hold their heavy loads.

Citrine didn’t know how to feel as they looked around at the destruction; obviously it was terrible, people had been hurt – _killed_ the darker part of their mind stressed – and homes destroyed, but at the same time they knew that the gem who had caused such chaos wasn’t in their right mind, they likely couldn’t even remember their own name, the blond couldn’t even imagine how much pain they must be in, how scared they must be. They were determined to help them, in any way they could.

But first they had to find them.

“Ok, so it’s definitely been here,” Labradorite said, stating the obvious, but it did help to break the slight tension between the group, “from all accounts this is where it was last seen, before disappearing back into the desert.”

Pietersite looked around as they tried to find any clues, but the destruction was the same in every direction. “Well, we know that it’s been targeting areas of high population, it would make sense for it to head towards Cairo, it’s not that far away and it’s the most densely populated city for miles around, I think we should head in that direction too.”

“No,” Labradorite said, a little too firmly, “it won’t have crossed the river.”

“How do you know that?” Rhodochrosite asked suspiciously.

“According to the reports it’s been attacking towns along the edge of the Nile, but it’s never crossed over and the buildings at the very water’s edge have been completely untouched.”

The brunet didn’t look convinced, “That could just be a coincidence and there’s no way of knowing it’s still the case, it’s drawn towards people, even if it is scared of water a capital city might be a big enough stimulus to draw it over the river, unless you have any other evidence to give?”

Labradorite’s face didn’t show any expression other than boredom – though that was pretty much normal for them – but they still hesitated for a few moments before answering. “I don’t, I suppose it is probable it might have gone to Cairo. We should split up; Citrine, Rhodochrosite, you two cross the river and search the city, me and Pietersite will go out into the desert and look for it th-”

“No, Citrine and Rhodochrosite will go into the desert and _we_ will cross the river,” Pietersite interrupted, “their powers and battle styles are not suited to urban environments, they could just end up causing even more damage than the monster, no offence you two.”

The two younger gems couldn’t help grinning slightly, “None taken, we’re just too strong for a human city to handle, right?” Citrine asked, holding out a fist to their friend.

“Absolutely,” she replied, gently tapping her own fist to Citrine’s, “we’ve got this.”

The oldest gem looked annoyed as they ran a hand through their white hair, but they didn’t push the matter. “Alright, but remember, if you do encounter it be careful; don’t take any unnecessary risks and don’t put your own lives at risk for the sake of a monster, understood?”

“Understood.”

\---

“So, what do you think’s up with the bum, they’ve been acting really weird about this whole thing,” Citrine asked, arms folded behind their head as the two gems aimlessly wandered the empty sand dunes.

Rhodochrosite sighed as she tried to find even the smallest sign that the monster had passed through recently. “Who knows, I can never tell what’s going on in their mind.”

“Yeah, but they’re not usually this against us fighting corrupted gems, maybe they know something about this one?”

“Obviously they do, but worrying about that now isn’t going to help us find the monster, just shut up and keep looking,” she said, upping her pace, Citrine jogged to catch up. They’d been walking for almost an hour so far and hadn’t seen hide nor hair of the monster, from the news reports they’d seen the thing was pretty huge, so it shouldn’t be that hard to spot, but the blond was beginning to think that maybe Pietersite was right and it had crossed the Nile.

They really hoped it hadn’t, not just because it meant the millions of people living there would be safe – though that certainly played a part – but, because they wanted a chance to try and save them, whoever they were.

Even if Labradorite thought they couldn’t do it. _Especially_ if Labradorite thought they couldn’t do it.

Not just to be spiteful, their old teacher was just a very untrusting, pessimistic soul and Citrine desperately wanted to prove to them that having hope and believing in others wasn’t naive or pointless; maybe then they’d stop looking so sad all the time.

And they might even notice what was right in front of them, in Pietersite.

But that was a longshot.

“Hey, are you even looking?”

Citrine blinked back into consciousness and looked at the pink-haired gem, she was standing a good hundred yards ahead of them at the top of the towering dune, hands on her hips and giving the blond her best exasperated glare.

“Eheh, whoops, sorry I got kinda lost in thought,” Citrine called as they moved to catch up.

She raised a brow, “I could tell, you need to stay focused, we don’t know where this thing is and, you know, if you’d help me look we might actually find the monster _before_ nightfa-” she never got to finish her sentence, the ground beneath her feet suddenly started to shift, then she was shot up into the sky by a huge paw.

Citrine lost their footing as the whole dune shuddered and sand ran down the sides like water, by the time they’d slid to the bottom and jumped away to more stable ground the dune had become little more than a formless pile of sand and, standing right in the middle of it all, was the monster.

Sand was still flowing off of it as it shook its huge bulk, but the creatures… skin – for lack of a better word – was almost exactly the same colour as the grains dripping off it, only broken by the strange blue patterns coating its back and giant limbs and it was _grinning_ ; a wide, entirely too toothy grin. Or maybe that was just how its face always looked, it was hard to tell.

“CHAAA!” Rhodochrosite came barrelling back down from her flight, knuckle dusters already drawn and aimed directly that the monster’s head.

A shockwave radiated out from the point of contact, the creature being pushed face-first into the ground from the gem’s punch. Its skin quivered strangely, as the gem lifted her fist for another strike, before the huge – scaled? – tail swiped at her.

Citrine jumped out of the way as the pink gem was hurled into the sand where they had just been standing. “Rho!”

They didn’t even get to the crater where she’d impacted, before a knuckled-dustered fist shot out of the sand and Rhodochrosite had crawled her way out. “I’m fine, stop gaping like a fish and help me out already,” she said, already leaping back into the fray.

The blond gem shook their head harshly, she was right, they weren’t doing anyone any favours standing around here, they easily formed a few hard-light holograms of themself – their favourite battle tactic was to just overwhelm the enemy with numbers – and charged in to aid their friend, gritting their teeth.

Citrine’s first strike against the creature’s front leg was almost completely ineffectual, their hand just thudded painfully against the hard surface, leaving only a slight dent, apparently the thing was covered in sand. They jumped away as the paw made to strike at them – if there was one good thing about the monster being as huge as it was, it was the time it took to make even a small movement. The gem watched as their clones crashed against various parts of the monster with much the same result; Rhodochrosite seemed to be having more luck, her powerful blows left blasts of dust and huge craters in the sand armour, but within seconds the sand had filled back in, nothing indicating that there’d been any damage in the first place.

A thunderous roar split the air as the two gems made a simultaneous attack at each leg, the creature destabilised enough that its front half crumpled to the ground, Citrine grinned and charged head-first towards the bulk of sand covering its head.

“Look out!”

The cry from behind them was enough to make them look up and see that vast tail swinging down towards them, they tried to quickly shift direction, but the loose sand beneath their feet gave them no grip, the only reason they weren’t crushed within seconds was the sudden thump at their side. They barely had enough time to register the blur of pink vanishing in a cloud of dust.

“Rho!” they cried, scrambling to their feet and rushing to the heavy column of sand their friend had disappeared under, “Oh my stars, please be ok, please be o-”

They skidded to a halt as the tail began to shudder again, sand cascading back to the ground as it slowly lifted, revealing…

Citrine darted under the appendage and scooped up the pink, diamond-shaped gem in their hand, before leaping away to safety. They made sure they got a good distance from the monster – which was still slowly pushing itself back to its feet – and gently laid down the gemstone on the sand. Rhodochrosite usually took a few hours to reform, but hopefully she’d hurry it up in this case, the younger gem wasn’t sure they’d be able to take the monster down alone.

Speaking of.

They wheeled around and raced back to the fight, their clones had been keeping it distracted while they got their friend to safety, but they still weren’t doing much damage. The original, with a burst of speed and some quick holographic platforms, launched themself up onto the great sandy beast, stumbling slightly as the thing tried to shake them off its back.

Quick, powerful blows were littered onto the sandy hide, but other than quickly mending hollows and irritated growling that made the creature’s armoured shell ripple like water, they had no effect. Clearly their normal attacks weren’t going to win this battle, with Rhodochrosite’s help they might be able to tear away enough of the sand protecting it that they could land some blows on the creature underneath – if indeed there _was_ a creature underneath, if it turned out that this entire thing was made of sand that’d be a real problem – or even fuse and combine their strengths, but she’d be out-of-commission for who knew how long, they had to think of another strategy.

Great, their weakest quality would be the decider of who won and who lost.

In that moment of distraction, a hard shake of the monster’s shoulders sent the gem flying into a dune, sand feeling more like rock as they crashed into it at speed. They wanted to wait for the world to stop spinning, but the shadow of a massive claw about to crash down on them forced them into action, rolling down the steep hill until they slowed to a halt near the giant’s feet.

Citrine was back on their feet before the monster could launch another attack, they darted around until they were behind the thing, then once again jumped onto its back.

They couldn’t keep doing this, they needed to find some way to end this fight.

Another shake of the monster’s hide made the gem stumble, but this time they kept as tight a grip as they could, world around them spinning wildly as the irritated creature tried to shake them off. The second it stopped Citrine was back up and looking around, there had to be some weak point on this thing…

Aha!

The blond had to dodge another swipe of the tail, but now they had something of a plan – rushed as it was. They ran along the great sandy spine, already preparing their fist for a punch, a simple hard-light projection around it to boost its strength.

With the run-up powering their strike, they leapt up off the creature’s neck and laid a solid blow directly on top of its head; it was nowhere near as strong as one of Rhodochrosite’s, but it was enough to push it down into the sand. Citrine jumped down in front of it and spun around to look the monster dead in its glowing, yellow eyes – their eyes briefly flicking to the thing’s forehead, where a small, dot of red broke up the gold and blue, _it must be its gem_ – as a rumbling growl shook the area.

A wide grin stretched across the blond’s face, “You call this a fight? I’ve barely broken a sweat!” they shouted.

It roared with a strength that actually produced a significant gale, but Citrine didn’t stick around for it to make another attack; they charged away from the beast, waving mockingly as they tore over the sand. The monster shrieked again and lumbered after the gem, slowly gaining momentum and speed as it chased after the irritation.

They skidded to a halt when they reached their destination, right at the edge of an oasis, not a huge one, but large enough for their purposes. They still had some time – huge clouds of sand were being kicked up into the air from where the creature was trying to catch up, still climbing over a dune – certainly long enough for what they had in mind, they slowed their breathing as much as they could and focussed on the light around them.

Citrines were a rare type of gem, ones highly connected to light and the sun; this particular Citrine wasn’t as adept at using some of the abilities their kind were capable of, especially the ones that required a lot of concentration – though their projections and holographic clones were unmatched – but they were good enough for this.

Carefully refracting the light in this small area, just a little, they created a mirage of sorts, the oasis directly in front of them now looked like it was actually way off near the horizon.

Just in time too, as the monster finally scaled the dune – though that dune was now significantly smaller – and was charging directly towards the small gem. Citrine stood their ground as the beast stormed towards them, paws scattering huge clouds of sand into the air every time they landed, huge maw open and roaring in a constant stream of ear-splitting noise. The blond stared the monster down as it drew closer, closer, closer, _now_ -

They lunged out of the creature’s path, only just missing being knocked by of its giant claws and still being buffeted by the blast of wind and sand left in its wake.

Another roar, this one half infuriated and half confused, as the mirage was shattered and the beast found itself waist-deep in a lake; cool water sucking at its sandy armour, weighing down its already cumbersome body. It screeched and wailed as it tried to pull its stocky limbs out of the pool, which was quickly turning into quicksand as it struggled to free itself.

Standing just out of the danger zone, catching their breath slightly, Citrine watched.

It was upsetting to see the creature like this, clearly its mind was gone, only rage and pure, animal instincts left, but they had to finish this, who knew how long it would take it to escape.

With a deep breath and a clenched fist, the gem sprung up to land on the monster’s head, the deep red gemstone – _a ruby perhaps?_ – glinted as they approached. Now that they were closer they could see more details about it, it was heart-shaped – _huh, that’s unusual_ – and splitting it into three sections was a huge crack. No wonder the thing was half-mad, Citrine had never seen a gem damaged that badly, at least, not without being shattered completely.

It was definitely a weak spot though and their best chance to take down the monster, they’d just have to be careful not to break it complete-

Suddenly a stream of sand jumped up from the creature’s head, wrapping tightly around the blond’s waist, they struggled against it as even more golden ropes lashed themselves to their arms and legs, attempting to pull them further away from the fragile gem.

Citrine panicked as they fought to free themself, but as they tried to push their fist into the gem it became obvious that it was never going to reach, not with the sand holding it back.

They kicked and struggled, but weren’t getting anywhere, the only option left was…

With as much strength as they could muster, they jerked their entire body forwards as hard as they possibly could, landing a solid head-butt against the cracked stone.

Then, everything turned white.

\---


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pretty short chap this time, sorry about that, but we can consider this the end of 'Act 1' so that's something at least. Don't feel too harsh on Kaka here, he's got his reasons for acting this way, it shall all be explained in time!  
> Enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

The first thing they saw when they finally regained consciousness was deep blue.

Citrine groaned and lifted a shaking hand to their head, it was still pounding up a storm, but other than the flaking, dried blood and painful, sore bump there seemed to be no real damage. Thank the stars for small miracles.

They gingerly pushed themselves into a sitting position – their vision blurring and mind spinning wildly for a few awful seconds – and looked around to try and work out what had happened.

They’d been out for a few hours, at least; the sky had gone from midday bright and burning, to midnight dark and chilling, the millions of stars up above the only way to distinguish between the sky and sand. They seemed to have fallen not far from where they’d last been, when they’d head-butted the monster; the oasis had turned into little more than a muddy puddle of quicksand, they felt a little bad about that, who knows how many animals and people had relied upon that water source out here in the desert.

But it’d been necessary to take down the monster…

The monster! Where was it? From what they remembered, after they’d landed that last blow against the creature it had poofed, a great cloud of white indicating the return to its gem, but it’d been at least half a day since then, what if it had reformed and wandered back off to terrorise more humans?

Citrine unsteadily jumped to their feet, spinning round apprehensively, they had to look around here first, maybe its gem had fallen nearby and-

Or not, the blond stared at the formless dark shape breaking up the navy ocean of sand. It was fairly small and utterly still, but the long – _scaled_ – tail, lying prone on the sand, let them know exactly who it was. At least they were smaller now.

Slowly, they made their way over to the creature, it apparently hadn’t noticed them, even where they were standing right behind it, it did not move.

“H-hello?” they said, voice slow and careful.

The monster – though was it still a monster when it looked far more humanoid in shape now? – gave no indication that it had heard them. They frowned slightly and moved to look at its front, not taking much care to be cautious anymore, if it hadn’t heard them talking it wasn’t going to hear their footsteps.

It wasn’t until they were standing directly in front of the creature that they stopped. It still hadn’t noticed them; in fact, it didn’t even seem to be conscious at all.

Its eyes were open, probably, though it was hard to tell, since they were completely blank and glowing an eerie, yellow colour, like two torches cutting through the night. It was creepy, but they did at least light enough of the creature for Citrine to get a good look at it. The whole thing seemed to be made from sand – or at least covered in sand – golden grains forming two long, clawed arms that were slumped on the ground, the strange tail was just lying perfectly still against the dune too.

Its upper body looked like it had tried to form more layers of protective sand, but they cut off like it had lost the strength hallway through forming its armour, fine cracks trailing all the way up its chest and neck, past its mouth – still far too many fangs for comfort, but at least it wasn’t grinning madly anymore – and up to the red, heart-shaped gem just above its left eye. Sand crawled up the sides of it, as though trying to keep the deeply cracked gem from falling apart, forcing itself to hold together through any means.

Citrine slowly crouched down to its level and waved a hand nervously past its eyes. Nothing.

“Hey, can you hear me? You awake in there?” they called, voice shaking just a little, but, after a minute with no response, they decided that it probably wasn’t going to be any danger to them.

They carefully reached out their hand to touch the poor beast’s arm – sand unexpectedly hard and coarse under their fingers – and waited again, just in case, but still, nothing. With a sigh they gently pulled until the monster was standing.

“Come on, let see if we can find Rhodochrosite,” they said, forcing as big a smile as they could manage right now onto their face and guiding the creature over the frozen dunes.

\---

The night sky was just starting to lighten, they’d been walking for about four hours now, the blond holding a huge sandy claw of the monster in one hand and the small, diamond-shaped gem of their best friend in the other.

Her gem had been right where they’d left it – though it had taken them a while to find that place again – still little more than a pretty, pink rock. Rhodochrosite usually took her time in reforming so they weren’t worried about her, but still; it would’ve been nice to have someone to talk to as they made their way back to the city where, hopefully, Labradorite and Pietersite would be waiting.

Their pace had been drastically slowed by the creature trailing mindlessly behind them, it was able to walk and seemed content enough to just be pulled along by the young gem, but it was still unresponsive and hadn’t made a single sound.

Citrine was starting to feel a bit lonely.

“-‘s that, over there?”

The blond’s head shot up suddenly, hood falling down at the motion. They concentrated on the distant voices up ahead, it was still too dark to see anything much, but there were two slightly darker dots just coming over the top of the next dune. Pulling their companion a little faster they moved towards them, perhaps they could give directions to Al Jizah-

“Citrine?” that voice was very familiar, a bright grin spread across their lips.

“Pietersite! Lazy bum!” they called out, running as fast as their heavy load would let them – which wasn’t much more than a jog, but the older two gems were rushing down the dune to meet them so it hardly mattered.

When they finally got close they flung themselves onto Pietersite, who only just managed to stop themself from falling over and return the hug with a winded chuckle.

“Calm down, it hasn’t been _that_ long since we last saw each other,” the brunet said.

Labradorite was being unusually quiet – they hadn’t even complained about their most hated nickname – causing Citrine to look over at them, their grin quickly fading when they saw their teacher glaring warily at the monster, iridescent kunai already drawn from their gem.

“Wait! Don’t hurt it, it’s not dangerous,” they jumped back to shield the creature with their own body, it hadn’t made any movement since they’d let go of it to hug Pietersite.

The mismatched eyes across from them narrowed. “What are you doing, get away from that thing before it attacks you,” Labradorite said, stepping to circle around them, the blond followed, always making sure they were directly in the line of fire.

“It’s not going to attack me, look at it, it’s not even moved at all! Besides, it’s had hours to try and hurt me but it hasn’t done a thing,” they said, not letting them out of their sight.

“Hours? You’ve let this thing run free for _hours_?”

Ok, that probably hadn’t been the smartest thing to say, they had to try and get their stubborn, pessimistic teacher to see that the monster was no harm to anyon-

“Citrine, where’s Rhodochrosite?” Pietersite’s gentle, worried voice had never been less welcome.

The blond stopped moving and looked down at the stone still held tightly in their grip, wordlessly, they offered it up to the two gems before them, the brunet gently took it in their hands.

Labradorite’s growl was quiet, but deadly; with a speed that only ever came out in battle, they leapt over Citrine’s head, landing behind the motionless form of the monster. By the time the young gem had managed to follow suit and grab hold of their teacher’s arm, it had already lashed out and left a long gash in the sand covering poor creature’s back.

A shriek shattered the pre-dawn silence.

But not from the monster, which had just stumbled a few steps forwards before slumping to the ground in a boneless heap.

“Labradorite! I just told you that it wasn’t dangerous!” Citrine screamed in the older gem’s ear, quickly detaching themself from their arm and rushing to the monster’s side, the cut was still visible, but sand was being drawn from the area around it to fill it in. They let out a sigh of relief, there wasn’t any lasting damage at least, though with how the monster was acting they were growing even more concerned about the state of their gem.

“Why are you defending it? It’s not a real gem anymore, it’s just a corrupted monster, you saw what it did to Rhodo-”

“She got hurt saving me! She pushed me out of the way and took the hit herself, I’m the one responsible for her being poofed, if I’d been paying more attention like you’re always telling me, then she wouldn’t have gotten hurt,” they snapped, spinning round to glare darkly into Labradorite’s surprised eyes, “and she’ll be fine, she always is after a few days; but they aren’t, their gem has been cracked so bad that it’s barely holding together, they can’t speak, they’re barely moving at all, even when you just _attacked_ them, they didn’t respond.”

There was a tense stand-off between the two, the younger’s fist’s shaking as they tried to stop themselves from punching their old mentor and the elder clenching their kunai tighter, as they stared each other down.

Pietersite finally broke the unintended staring match between them. “Citrine’s right, come and look at this, I’ve never seen such bad damage before. It’s a miracle they haven’t shattered completely,” they said, kneeling before the monster and studying its gem closely.

Slowly and with exaggerated care, Labradorite dropped their weapon – it blinked away in a flash of white just as it hit the sand – and made their way over to look at the creature’s gem, the blond watching their every step like a hawk and standing right next to them as they stopped in front of the beast, just in case they tried something.

Leaning down to look at the red stone they hmm-ed thoughtfully.

“Citrine, did you do this?” Pietersite asked, looking up at their student.

“No, well, maybe I made it a little bit worse, but it was really bad even before I head-butted it, looked like it was gonna fall apart any second,” they turned their attention to the white-haired gem. “See? Even if it _wanted_ to hurt us – and it really doesn’t look like it does – do you think it’s going to be much of a threat when it can barely walk? We’ve never seen a corrupted gem that looks so normal, kinda, I know we can save this one! Rho’s gonna be back soon and she can heal the cracks, obviously we’ll be careful about it, but we have to give it a chance.”

Labradorite stood back up straight and ran a hand through their hair, after a long few minutes, they finally let out a deep sigh, “Alright, I’ll give you one chance, but if you heal it and it turns out to be hostile we are taking it down, for real this time, understood?”

The blond gem grinned and threw their arms around their mentor’s waist, “You won’t regret this!”

“I already do.”

\---


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So those discrepancies with SU canon that I warned about earlier? This is where they probably start to rear their ugly heads, bUT I’m quite happy to shrug it up, soooo… *shrugs*  
> Also, thank you all for the super kind response to this fic! You’re such sweeties and I love you all (platonically)! Anyways, hope you enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

“Ahhh, it’s good to be home!” Citrine yelled out, to no one in particular.

“Actually, we’re still about twenty minutes from home,” Pietersite said, grinning good-naturedly and ruffling the younger gem’s mess of blond hair.

They swatted the hand away, “Nope, we’re standing right next to it,” they stated confidently.

The brunet raised a sceptical eyebrow and looked around them. Nope, they were definitely still in the middle of town, their house was located right at the outskirts of Konoha, where the small town turned to forest and field – they’d found it was best to keep contact with humans to a minimum, not that Citrine had ever paid much mind to that – and this was definitely not-

“Ah.”

“Yeah! C’mon, let’s get some ramen,” the young gem didn’t wait for a response and marched right into their favourite food stand, pulling a mindless, blank-faced gem monster behind them.

In less than ten seconds there was a screaming man pulling his two children out onto the street.

Pietersite had to resist the urge to smack their own head.

\---

The house was empty when they finally got back; Pietersite had decided not to join them for ramen, instead going home to drop off Rhodochrosite’s gem. The blond had expected to find them still here, but they had probably gone off to find Labradorite, who had disappeared shortly after getting back to Konoha.

After a quick search of the small building, just to be sure, they found no sign of any inhabitants, except for the pink rock carefully settled in Rho’s room.

Sighing deeply, Citrine guided the creature they’d been caring for into their own room. It was more than a little messy and the walls were an eye-searingly bright orange – or at least that’s what the others called it, the blond gem themself saw no problems with the colour at all – but it was where they were most comfortable. The corrupted gem didn’t have any reaction to the new environment, they still hadn’t made a single sound and didn’t look like they were even aware of anything happening around them.

“So, this is where you’re gonna be staying; at least, until you’re better anyways, hmm, I guess we’ll have to add another extension so you can have your own room too, but that can wait till you can talk again, then you get to choose what it looks like! I can’t wait, it’d be nice to have a new friend, y’know?” they said, slumping down onto their bed as they waited for any response.

The creature just stood in the middle of the room, staring at nothing with their empty, glowing eyes.

Citrine exhaled gloomily, this was going to be an unbearable wait.

\---

“See, you like sand right? C’mon, let’s go sit in it together!” The excited blond gem pulled on the heavy sandy paw until the monster was standing on the huge pile of sand.

It had only been a day since they’d got back, but Citrine was already starting to worry that maybe the creature was homesick; so, in an effort to make it feel more comfortable, they’d gone out and bought a whole bunch of sandbags from town and dumped their contents smack-bang in the middle of the garden.

They sat heavily on the – surprisingly comfortable – mound, “Ok, so it’s not _exactly_ like the desert, but this is nice, we can just sit here and you can play with the sand if you want,” they said, not really expecting any answer.

“What are you doing?”

Silently, they wished for Labradorite’s swift demise, if only so that there would be no one alive who could recall the awful squeak that had just come out of Citrine’s mouth. “H-hey, lazy bum,” they said, tilting their head back to look at the looming figure behind them, “What does it look like, I’m helping Ai not feel homesick.”

A white eyebrow raised expectantly, “Ai?”

“Well, they can’t tell me their real name and I’m not gonna just call them ‘monster’ all the time, so Ai, ‘cause of their gem,” the blond pointed towards the heart-shaped stone.

“… Cute, but unnecessary, I’m relatively sure I know what they are. I’d like to do a quick examination, just to check.” They held up their hands before Citrine could even get a syllable out of their opened mouth, “I’m not going to do anything, I just want to have a proper look at its gem and confirm my suspicions.”

There was a tense moment as the younger gem searched the elder’s for any sign of deception, but they quickly relented. “Fine, but be careful, it’s really fragile at the moment.”

“Of course,” with that said Labradorite stepped closer to the creature and crouched down before it, studying its forehead closely.

Citrine watched in nervous excitement, they were confident in their mentor’s damn-near encyclopaedic knowledge of gem types; it was actually kind of scary how quickly they could identify a gem’s name and abilities from just a quick inspection of their gemstone. The blond bounced in place as they mentally urged their teacher to just hurry up alre-

“Well, it’s definitely a Bixbite,” they finally declared, pushing themself back to their feet and brushing some sand off of their knees.

“A Bixbite? That’s awesome, I’ve never met one before!” Citrine shuffled to sit in front of the monstrous form, “Hey, your name is Bixbite, do you remember that?”

Nothing.

Labradorite sighed as they ran a hand through their hair – it shone a rainbow of colours in this light. “I wouldn’t expect anything from them while their gem is this damaged. Pietersite was right, I’ve never see anything like this outside of a completely shattered gem, they’re probably putting all their focus and will into keeping this form together. Until they’re healed they won’t be able to register anything happening around them.”

The young gem frowned at that, they’d hoped that once they were healed up they would at least remember being looked after by the orange gem.

“Hey, Labradorite, I don’t know very much about Bixbites, can you tell me a bit about them?”

Humming slightly, the older gem settled down next to their student. “I’m afraid I don’t know that much myself; they’re extremely rare, have abilities related to sand and that’s about it, but I do know that there was one Bixbite who fought in the war. For Homeworld,” they said, pointedly staring into Citrine’s bright blue eyes.

They recoiled slightly at the revelation, glancing between the detached monster and their teacher rapidly.

“I suspected that was who they were right from the start and if I’m right then they are _incredibly_ dangerous, even if you do manage to heal them, I doubt they’ll react kindly to anyone who fought for the rebellion.”

The blond frowned, deep in thought, as they tried to reconcile the deadly warrior that Labradorite was speaking of, with the poor, sad-looking creature that they’d become unreasonably attached to in such a short amount of time. “Well… So what if they were our enemy before? We were all on Homeworld’s side at some point or another and we all saw the light and switched sides, maybe they just never got shown that light, if we just show them how special the Earth is and how much happier life is away from Homeworld, then they’ll want to join us!”

Labradorite gave them a sceptical look, before shaking their head and pushing themself back up. “I suppose we’ll just have to wait and see. In the meantime, please clean up this mess, there’s no need to go giving a potential enemy more weaponry than they already have, ok?”

Citrine half wanted to punch that annoying smile off their face – or as much of the smile as they could see with their mentor’s face always covered up – but they just returned the grin and shot to their feet, saluting cheekily. “Yessir! I will do that right away, sir!”

They looked confused for a second, but only shrugged and sauntered off into the nearby forest.

“C’mon Bixbite, I know exactly where we can put this sand,” they snickered, already scoping out Labradorite’s bedroom window.

\---

They watched as rain pattered against the ground outside, it wasn’t particularly heavy – little more than a shower – but Citrine always felt more down when the sun wasn’t out.

Especially now, as they were sitting on the patio besides their new companion.

Pietersite and Labradorite were busy, watching some boring human show they both loved for some inexplicable reason and there was very little to do in the house without their best friend around to talk to.

Earlier, they had tried to get Bixbite out to play in the rain with them and for the first time they’d gotten something of a reaction out of the impassive creature; fear and discomfort, as it had curled into a loose ball, with its arms covering its head and tail wrapped around its body. As soon as Citrine had noticed the sand starting to soak through, crumble and drip off its form, they had urgently pulled them back under the protection of the roof.

After apologising for a full minute and making sure that their charge was safe and happy – or, at least not _un_ happy – they’d sat down next to them with a sigh.

“Sorry, I should have expected that, huh? You’re not hurt though, so that’s good. I just wish you could tell me, before I make you do something you don’t like,” Citrine said quietly, glancing at Bixbite.

They really wished they could actually have a conversation with them; not that they hadn’t tried, they’d talked to the poor creature about anything and everything, but what they really wanted was to hear their voice and thoughts. The blond wondered what they were like, was this corrupted form indicative of their usual personality, or were they actually really loud and cheerful? Did they always not like water, or was it just because they were covered in sand right now?

Did they really choose to fight for Homeworld, or did they just never know that there was another option?

\---

“Do we have to watch this?”

“Yes, it’s my turn to choose a movie and I wanna watch Lonely Blade III: A Slash in Time,” Citrine poked their tongue out at their grumbling teachers as they set up the TV for their regular movie night. “Bixbite wants to watch it too, right?” they said, behind them to the creature on the pile of cushions they’d set up on the floor.

Bixbite didn’t respond.

“See? It’s three vs one Pietersite, you lose!”

The older gem groaned but settled into their chair and didn’t complain any further; Labradorite was lying over the couch, focusing most of their attention on the orange book in their hand as usual, though that somehow never stopped them from catching the plot of whatever film they happened to be watching.

Finally done fiddling with the video player, Citrine bounced to their feet and went to turn off the lights. The room was blanketed in darkness, except for the colourful glow of the TV and…

“Hey, who left a light on?” they said, glowering at the white shaft of light coming from the hallway.

“I never leave lights on if it’s not necessary,” Pietersite said, they did like to preach about being eco-friendly.

“Don’t know why you’re looking at me, I don’t even turn them on in the first place,” and Labradorite liked to brag about their superior eyesight at any given opportunity.

Well it definitely wasn’t the blond, who hadn’t even been in their room since this morning. They frowned and were about to go and find out which of their teachers was lying when the light faded away. Lightning? But there was no rain drumming on the roof and the flash had lasted way too long-

“Umm, is anyone in?”

Citrine was out into the hall in less than a second. “Rho, you’re back!” they screamed.

The pink gem, wandering out of her room, was a sight for sore eyes. With a jump from halfway down the hall, the blond leapt into her arms; their best friend didn’t even stumble, just caught them and laughed at their normal overreaction to her whenever she reformed.

“Wow, miss me much?” she snickered, unable to keep the smug grin from her face.

“Yes!” the gem in her arms wailed, happy tears already staining her top, she sighed resignedly and carried them back to the living room, where her teachers were already standing up to greet her, Labradorite nodded and ruffled her hair in their usual cool manner.

Pietersite casually pulled Citrine from her arms and gave her a gentle hug, “Good to see you looking well, how do you feel?”

Rhodochrosite flexed a strong arm, “Rested and ready for anything, I take it you guys took care of the gem monster if we’re all back home?” she asked, idly flicking her eyes to the glowing TV screen, she’d only turned back to her friend for a second before her entire head snapped to the TV, or rather, to the bulky, shapeless mass slumped in front of it, with yellow eyes glowing bright.

“Ok, what the hell happened while I was out?”

Every eye in the room – excluding Bixbite’s – turned to the young, blond gem.

“Eheheh, well, I took down the monster all by myself! And then brought it home with me.”

The pink gem groaned and smacked her hand to her face, “I can’t leave you three alone for a minute, can I?”

\---

They’d all gathered around the dining table as they filled Rhodochrosite in on everything she’d missed in the last three days. She’d listened quietly and calmly as Citrine explained how they’d taken down the monster – giving them a proud high-five at hearing how well they handled the battle – and how they’d found the monster in this weakened form, then they explained that they wanted her to try healing it.

Labradorite had butted in a few times to remind everyone how terrible an idea this was and that now would be a great time to change their minds, but Rhodochrosite found herself siding quite strongly with her Citrine.

“I’ve never seen this type of corruption before, I think I can actually do it this time!” she said, shutting down her teacher’s latest argument, “And you are not going to stop me trying, but we should go outside, just in case this goes badly.” With her piece said, she marched out into the night, her blond friend pulling the blank creature behind them.

She took a few minutes to carefully examine the damage to the red gem; it was bad, really bad, barely holding itself together with the sand covering it.

But, it wasn’t shattered yet, which meant she could still work her magic.

“Everyone, be ready for this, I don’t know what their reaction is gonna be, so stay on guard.”

With great care not to touch the fragile stone, she hovered her hands just above its surface and cleared her mind of all thoughts. Healing was an uncommon ability for gems, though certainly not unheard of; wars and armies always meant gems would be injured, having a few medics on the field was only logical and, if there was one thing Homeworld did well, it was logic.

She closed her eyes – mostly because Citrine’s fretting behind the creature was distracting – but she knew that right now her hands would be starting to glow a soft green. Slowly, with all the focus she could muster, she let her energy leak into the cracks of the Bixbite’s gem, filling in the gaps. It was harder than she’d originally expected, the damage looked bad enough on the outside, but within the deepest parts of the gem were even more hidden crevices and fractures that needed to be filled, strengthened, until-

There! With every part of the stone filled in with her healing aura, she encouraged the stone to regrow, new crystals and connections gradually forming, taking the parts of the gem that had been only just holding and bridging the gaps between them.

She kept her hands steady until she was absolutely sure that there was nothing left for her to do, then she released her energy quickly and slumped in a heap. Healing always took a lot out of her and this hadn’t exactly been an easy patient.

“Rho, are you alright? Did it work? They aren’t moving, why aren’t they moving?” Citrine’s barrage of questions were pretty annoying right now.

“Just… Give it a minute, dummy,” Rhodochrosite panted out.

All eyes were on the gem creature now, it hadn’t moved at all, not when she’d first started the healing process and not now that it should be over. Its gem was whole now, glittering in the moonlight in a way that it hadn’t when it’d been cracked, but there was no other indication that the monster was at all aware.

The pink-haired gem frowned and pushed herself into a sitting position – gently shrugging off Pietersite’s worried hands – she leaned closer to examine the creature, it’s eyes were still glowing that eerie yellow colour, but they seemed to be… flickering? Only slightly, but there was a definite changing from yellow to blue to green and-

A sudden puff of smoke and the monster was gone, replaced by a small, heart-shaped gem.

\---


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  ~~This is the last of the waiting around for the plot to happen I swear~~ Weird thing I googled in writing this chapter: “What colour are Japanese traffic cones?” (as far as I can tell, mostly orange/red with some blue and some painted to look like Mt Fuji and cute cartoon characters and such), this is the level of detail I go to for you wonderful folks! ~~And then completely ignore for the sake of a joke~~  
>  Hope you enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

Day two, the red gem still hadn’t reformed yet.

Citrine was sitting at the table, head resting on folded arms as they stared forlornly into the stone; their reflection tinted pink and distorted by the faceted surface. They had barely moved all day, after a few hours with no sign that the Bixbite was going to show up, the others had all wandered off to do their own things; Citrine would normally be running around town offering a helping hand to the locals in exchange for money and sometimes food, but they’d decided that they were too distracted right now to be much use to anyone.

So, they had stayed at home, watching the rock in the hopes that it would do something, _anything_. It hadn’t.

They knew that there was no reason to be so anxious about it, most gems took between a few hours and a few days to reform – Rhodochrosite had taken three days – and with the amount of damage that had been done to the red gem’s physical form, not to mention the unseen damage of corruption, it was incredibly unlikely that they would be coming back anytime soon.

But that hadn’t stopped them from their eager waiting, even if it had grown significantly less eager the longer they’d been sat here.

With a sigh, they gently lifted the gemstone off the table and up to their eyes; they peered into the depths of the crystal, searching for some sign of life or awareness. “Hey, you’ve been through a lot huh?” they muttered softly.

Nothing.

“You must be pretty scared and confused right now; I know you can’t really hear me in there, but I just want you to know that whenever you’re ready to come back, you don’t need to worry, you’ll be safe, just… please hurry up, I can’t wait to actually meet you.”

\---

Day six, they got ramen together.

Or rather, the blond gem had coerced Pietersite into paying for their twelve-bowl feast, while the red gem sat on the counter next to them.

Occasionally they waved a noodle or chunk of meat in front of it – ok, so the odds that Bixbite would somehow smell the delicious scent from inside their gem and decide they simply _must_ reform right this instant to try the heavenly ambrosia for themself were low, but Citrine was nothing if not hopeful.

It hadn’t worked, but they had decided that once they did reform, the first thing they would have to show their new friend was the ramen stand where they spent almost all of their time and money.

\---

Day eleven, Labradorite tried to steal Bixbite.

It wasn’t really necessary for a gem to sleep, but Citrine liked the act – it was rejuvenating even if they didn’t technically get much out of it – of course, the downside to sleeping was that you could be caught unawares.

“Aaagh! What are you _doing_?”

Labradorite blinked, not moving even an inch at the sudden scream, they just stayed crouching right at the edge of Citrine’s bed, mismatched eyes glinting in the darkness.

Scrambling to sit up the blond gem tried to work out what their teacher could possibly wan- wait.

“Hey! What’re you doing to Bixbite?” they yelped, snatching the small gem out of Labradorite’s slackened hands – at least they didn’t put up a fight – and pulling it close to their chest. “I told you not to touch them, what were you even doing? Don’t you know how creepy it is to watch someone when they’re sleeping? You better not have hurt them,” they continued, warily inspecting the gem for even the slightest bit of damage.

The older gem’s eyes closed the way they always did when they were lying, “Well, you just looked so peaceful there and I noticed you were about to roll over onto the gem, which wouldn’t be very comfort-”

“You expect me to believe that?” Citrine asked, glaring as menacingly as they could whilst protectively hugging a rock.

“Worth a shot,” Labradorite said, shrugging their shoulders as they easily pushed themself to their feet, “I guess I’ll just leave you two alone, but – just a word of advice – if I could get hold of that gem without you noticing, you should probably be more vigilant, we don’t know when it’s going to reform.” Their lanky form ambled out into the hallway.

The blond frowned, but didn’t want to start another argument with their teacher on the topic of Bixbite’s trustworthiness.

Only when the door swished softly shut did Citrine speak again, “I guess they have a point, how am I gonna be able to greet you if I’m asleep?” They lay back down, gently placing the heart-shaped gem on the pillow next to them; this time, they would stay awake.

\---

Day twenty-nine, they were chilling at home.

Taking Bixbite everywhere with them was fun and all, but sometimes you just needed to sit on the sofa and watch some weird human reality shows with your family. Even if one quarter of that family was dead to the world and another was so engrossed in her scary medical books that she might as well be.

At least Pietersite was aware enough to talk to them.

“This is so stupid; why would anyone willingly go on a show where they’re just humiliated for half an hour?” Complaining was still better than silence in Citrine’s opinion.

“I dunno, probably some human thing,” they replied, shrugging as they shovelled another handful of crisps into their mouth, flicking the channel to some dull soap opera – they quite liked most reality shows, but Pietersite had had a point, that one was just too mean-spirited to be entertaining.

Their mentor frowned as they settled into their chair more comfortably, “We aren’t _that_ different, you know.”

“Sure we are, they only live for like, a few hours and they only shapeshift really slowly, into one form and they can’t go back into their gems to heal,” Citrine grinned at the red stone sat next to them, “they have to do all their gross recovering where everyone can see them, see? We’re nothing alike at all!”

The brunet raised a sceptical eyebrow but didn’t bother trying to argue – they knew that Citrine was only joking, they liked humans far more than anyone else in the house did. “If you say so, though, speaking of healing, they certainly do seem to be taking their time, don’t they?”

The younger gem’s grin faded slightly. “Yeah, I guess so…”

“Even the gems I’ve known who took a long while to reform never took this long,” Pietersite said, glancing at Citrine out of the corner of their eye. They weren’t stupid, they knew how eager their old student was to meet this Bixbite, to make a new friend – they’d always been the friendliest and most hopeful gem they’d ever had the pleasure of knowing, but now it was starting to become a problem.

They had to start being realistic, it’d been almost a month and the gem was just as lifeless as it had been when it first poofed; the chances that they were never going to reform were pretty damn high.

Not that that would necessarily be a bad thing; although they didn’t share Labradorite’s extreme paranoia and distrust for the Bixbite, they did understand that this was likely an old enemy – one who probably wouldn’t be happy to see any Crystal Gems – and a peaceful first encounter was very low on the list of possibilities.

Even so, seeing how excited and almost childish Citrine had been getting over the possibility of making a new friend had quickly worn away at those doubts and every time they’d caught the blond chatting away to the stone, or keeping it safely in their fox-eared hood as they went about their day, made them feel more and more pained at their pessimistic thoughts; that they were never actually going to meet them and, with those thoughts, came the horrible realisation that one day, Citrine was going to think it too.

They really didn’t want to see that day, but at the same time, was letting them go on in their naive, innocent, hopes really any healthier? Surely having them come to terms with the – very real – possibility that Bixbite was never going to reform early on, would be better for them in the long run?

Pietersite let out a sigh and turned to look at their cherished student, “Citrine, I know it’s painful to hear, but… I’ve never heard of a gem taking so long to reform. There’s a chance that the healing didn’t work, maybe it was already too la-”

“I’m tired, ’m gonna go sleep,” the blond muttered quietly, already out of the room before Pietersite could say anything to stop them.

\---

Citrine had stopped counting the days about a week ago. Or perhaps it was two weeks? They seemed to have lost all track of time lately; only vaguely aware of the gradually lightening and darkening sky, unable to focus on the voices of their housemates, wandering zombie-like from room to room, gaze permanently fixed on the blood-red gemstone in their possession.

“Hey, you haven’t spoken at all in days, are you alright?” Rhodochrosite’s soft voice somehow managed to filter through the thick haze that had settled in the blond gem’s mind, blinking their eyes slowly and turned their gaze to their friend, who was just sitting down across from them at the table.

Clearing their, suddenly unbearably dry, throat, they lifted their head off the table top – a painful crick revealing just how long they’d been slumped over like that. “’m fine,” they managed to croak out.

She raised a pink eyebrow.

“Just, tired and bored,” they continued, uncertainly.

“Mhmm, well I hope you’re not too tired for ramen?” she sang, pushing the bowl Citrine hadn’t even noticed over to them.

They looked at the dish, any other time they’d be thrilled to see their favourite meal, but now…

“I’m not sure I’m up for eating right now, sorry.” They couldn’t even bring themself to look her in the eyes.

“You sure? It’s Ichiraku’s, I went and picked it up myself,” she smiled at the way they perked up suddenly, “and you need something to give you a little energy right now, normally I’d suggest sleep, but Labradorite mentioned that they might’ve scarred you for life.”

Citrine snorted, if their mentor being a creep had ever scared them off anything, it was reading – they really didn’t want to know what was in those ‘ _Icha Icha_ ’ books Labradorite seemed utterly glued to half the time. After taking the first bite of soft noodles, though, they glanced at the red gemstone sitting on the table and were suddenly hit with a cold shower of doubt and worry. They idly spun their chopsticks in the broth as they stared hard at the rock, chewing on their lip anxiously.

There was a long silence, not uncomfortable, but the blond couldn’t stop their mind and eyes from drifting back the red heart gleaming against the light wooden surface it was placed on.

How long had it been now? Months, plus however many weeks they had missed in their obsessive counting of days; Citrine had been excited at first, when it seemed like they might finally get to meet the gem in person at any moment, but it’d been so long, they were honestly trying to come to terms with the fact that they might never reform.

“What’s that look for?”

Slowly, the blond tore their gaze from Bixbite’s gem, “What look?”

Rhodochrosite frowned deeply, “That miserable, pitiful look – like a kid who’s had their favourite toy taken away and has just realised that crying isn’t going to get it back.”

“Excuse me?” Citrine asked, voice raising high in their indignation.

“You heard me. So, what’s the problem?” her strong arms were folded, her expression soft, but determined – the same expression she got when she was healing someone – her steady, green gaze telling them that she was not going to accept anything less than the full and honest truth.

They met her eyes for only a few seconds, quickly needing to break away and check on the gemstone on the table, they sighed deeply. “I… what’s taking them so long? I was _so_ sure that this time would be the one, y’know? It all seemed to be going so well, they went from being a huge monster to just a small one, then you were so amazing at healing their gem and I thought that after a few days we might actually be able to meet them, but it’s been months and they’re _still_ , just… what if they never reform? What if all of that effort and waiting is for nothing?” Citrine pulled their hood further down over their hair roughly, feeling the horrible prickling of tears at the back of their eyes.

“You’re being impatient,” Rhodochrosite said simply, “of course it’s taking a long time, do you even remember how damaged their gem was? Reforming after going through that trauma isn’t going to be an easy task and that’s not even taking into account the corruption, we don’t know what kind of lasting effect that has on a gem, for all we know, they’re needing to go far back to try and remember their original form.”

“That’s even worse! How can I help them with that? What if it takes years for them to show up?” their hand thudded onto against the table, rocking the gem slightly.

A rough hand landed on theirs, squeezing lightly. “Then it takes years. We can’t decide how long this takes for them, just how we react when they eventually come back to the world – and they will come back! I believe that this time will be the one that works, I know you do too, so where’s that stubborn knucklehead Citrine that I know and love, huh? The idiot who doesn’t know the meaning of the words ‘give up’ and still somehow comes out of every battle on top; because I think that Bixbite would like them a whole lot more than the mopey dopey who spends all day staring at the walls, feeling lonely and bored.”

Her grin was infectious and Citrine was unable – and unwilling – to try and resist.

“Yeah, you’re right,” they said, squeezing back the hand still holding theirs.

Rhodochrosite snorted, “Of course, I always am. So, no more moping?” she asked dangerously, her grip tightening just enough to warn against giving the wrong answer.

The blond gem shook their head eagerly, “No more moping, promise!” they said, standing up all of a sudden and pulling their friend up with them, before she could get her bearings they pulled her into a tight hug – or as tight as they could manage with the table in the way.

“Thanks,” Citrine whispered into her ear.

“Anytime… Now, hurry up and eat your ramen, I’m not buying you another one just because you let this one go cold!”

\---

Even after they had regained their awareness and energy enough to check how long it had been, Citrine had decided to stop counting the time it was taking Bixbite to come back to the world of the living. It only made them focus on what _wasn’t_ happening, rather than what was.

And what was happening right now, was hiding.

Apparently old man Sarutobi hadn’t liked the beautiful mural they’d painted. The blond didn’t see what the problem was, toads were cool, why _wouldn’t_ you want one on your boring old courthouse?

But dislike it he did, so here they were, hiding out on a rooftop as the livid old man asked every random passer-by below if they’d seen ‘a blond wearing enough orange to pass for a traffic cone’ around anywhere. He’d had no luck so far, but Citrine was impressed with his perseverance, he’d been at it for more than an hour without stopping, even after their worst pranks, Pietersite never looked for the trickster for more than thirty minutes.

Then again, that was usually because they’d already found them by that time.

“See Bixbite?” they said, pulling the red gem from their pocket. “Playing pranks is really great, especially when you don’t get caught! I wonder if you’re any good at pranking people, I bet you could do all kinds of funny stuff with your sand, like getting it in people’s clothes and making them itchy and uncomfortable, or making the ground move out from under them, though I guess they’d have to be standing on a beach or something for that to work…”

“Causing trouble again, I see, I do hope you’re not planning on winning over our enemies with your childish games?” Labradorite’s lazy drawl was enough to make them freeze in terror.

Chuckling nervously, Citrine turned to look at their teacher. “Eheheh, hey there, Labradorite, you, uh, didn’t happen to find Pietersite did you? They were looking for y-”

“Nice try, I believe you have a wall that needs cleaning?” That smug grin – how the older gem managed to convey such expressions with their eyes alone was still baffling to them – almost made them wish it had actually been the old man who found them first.

\---

It was a quiet night, for a change.

Citrine was the only one in at the moment; Rhodochrosite and Pietersite were in town – watching some boring-sounding play that the blond had declined an invitation to – and Labradorite… Well, they always disappeared randomly without any warning or clue as to where they were, probably off sleeping somewhere that Citrine couldn’t bother them.

On the bright side, that meant they had the whole house to themself, so they could sing and dance as loud as they wanted with no one complaining about trying to concentrate on their books, or boring news shows, or napping.

Right now they were jumping around the living area, vaulting over chairs, shimmying up against walls and kicking their legs as high as they would go – only knocking over a lamp _once_.

Cheerful, high-energy, pop music filled the whole house, as well as the childlike laughter of the blond, who was spinning in place till the world seemed to fall out from under them, rocking like a boat on the ocean, but still not dizzying enough for them to stop squealing in pure joy; they generally didn’t like being alone, but they found ways to entertain themself when they were.

Finally, their laughter faded away – not because they’d stopped having fun, but because they were running out of breath – along with the sweet melody of the song they were listening to.

Though, the second that the next track on the album started, Citrine was back on their feet, arms waving and bouncing off the walls in excitement, as they sang alone in their, admittedly a little off-key, voice.

A sudden bang halted their rave.

Dropping their arms and freezing to a halt, they spun round to its source – _oh my stars, who saw me, if it was Rho I’m never gonna hear the end of it…_

They couldn’t move.

There was someone leaning heavily against the kitchen counter, it looked like they’d fallen over and were just trying to pull themselves back up, but what really struck Citrine was that they _didn’t know them_.

Slowly, with the kind of care that the young gem would usually associate with new-born animals in a nature documentary, they rose to their feet, still using the counter as a support.

While their body was utterly frozen, they took the time to inspect the intruder.

They were small and slender, wearing a long scarlet robe that glittered in the low light, broken only by some kind of armoured vest; as they pushed themself further up, their loose curly hair – a red so vibrant that it almost didn’t seem natural – slowly fell away, uncovering an unbelievably pretty face, scrunched slightly in concentration.

Black-rimmed eyes blinked open sharply, revealing a piercing sea-green gaze, framed by thick, red lashes and there, just above their left eye, was a small, crimson, heart-shaped gem.

Citrine suddenly felt very hot and their mouth very dry.

The gem across from them glanced away, eyes darting to every corner of the room and their breathing growing incrementally faster and faster.

They desperately wanted to move, speak, _anything_ ; but their entire body seemed to have shut down, not willing to do anything but stare at the beautiful stranger who looked like they were going to have a panic attack any second, if the way their body was shaking and their frantic eyes were anything to go by.

One hand leaning against the counter, the red gem’s other snapped to their forehead, clenching at their hair hard enough to look painful.

Finally, Citrine found their body back under their mind’s control, they took a step forwards, but the way that that green glare snapped to the movement and stayed fixed on the blond, made them pause. They must be terrified, they’d spent stars knew how long as a little more than a monster raging in the desert, the last time they would’ve been aware was probably on a battlefield, or during the mad retreat to Homeworld. This was a delicate situation, their usual tactic of ‘charging in head first and worrying about the fallout later’ wasn’t going to work here.

“Hey,” they said, as softly as they could, “you’re safe, don’t worry, it’s… Bixbite, right?”

The other gem’s glare died down, replaced by a slight look of confusion, though their grasp on their red locks tightened visibly – pink skin turning white from the pressure.

“Everything’s fine, we’re all just… calm and friendly here, right?” they coaxed gently; keeping their hands open and relaxed, even as they ever-so-slowly inched forwards. “I know you must be really confused right now, but it’ll be ok, I promise. Do you remember anything?”

Green eyes glazed over for a moment, before they snapped shut and the gem fell to their knees, both hands ripping at their hair now.

Citrine lurched forwards, before stopping uncertainly, they didn’t know what to do, would making contact with them be comforting or distressing right now? But they couldn’t just stand here watching, it wasn’t in their nature; as slowly as they could manage in their panic, the blond knelt down in front of the redhead, keeping a few feet between them.

They were just about to lean forward and lightly touch the other gem’s arm, but the striking green eyes were back on them, pinning them in place as Bixbite’s lips opened to speak.

“Citrine, we’re back! You’d better not have built a fort out of all our pillows again…”

As Rhodochrosite and Pietersite wandered into the room, all hell broke loose.

\---


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  ~~you don’t want to know how long I spent looking for any canon clues as to what form of military Gems have, I just went with a navy in the end cause space _ships_ but yeah~~  
>  The grammar in this section is probably hecked right up, I am aware, but I was deliberately playing around with it to try and suggest a state of mind, I think it worked out pretty well (seriously I’m so thrilled with this chap, I think it might be my current fave???)  
> Anyways, enjoy me lovelies!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

Immediately they were assaulted by a chaotic swirl of noise and colour, blinded by sound, deafened by light.

Their first priority had to be to find the enemy and destroy them, before they noticed this moment of weakness and confusion. But as they lifted their head to scan their new surroundings, the yellow and orange lights around them swirled and bled like ink in water and the entire world felt as though it was rocking violently, a regular thudding beat shuddering up their legs.

Suddenly, they were falling, the armoured material of their vest not enough to protect them from the jolt to their insides.

They lay prone for only a few seconds, they couldn’t stay here, they were vulnerable right now, they had to get up, get away, get somewhere _quiet_ ; where the awful thudding war drums and strange, high, wailing chant couldn’t reach them.

Pushing themself to their feet was more of a task than was acceptable – Admiral Pyrite would’ve had their gem cracked even more for such weakness – but, eventually they were able to grasp the hard surface next to them and stand straight, or as straight as they could manage when the ground still seemed to be shifting and pounding beneath them.

They suddenly became aware of the familiar sensation of eyes boring into them, not caring about the light anymore, their lids snapped open, immediately locking onto the gem before them; orange and yellow, gem located on stomach, short, stocky stature, a quartz warrior? Unusually short if they were, no weapon drawn, no uniform, no star, face revealing… shock and something else, fear? No, they were well acquainted with that emotion, they were blushing, a sign of embarrassment, they had been told, or anger, but their stance was weak and defensive.

Whatever it was they were feeling, they were not an immediate threat, this gave Bixbite the chance to look around, hopefully find something that could clarify their situation, perhaps they had been found by a Homeworld ship and were being taken home?

No, not a ship. Now that the world had stopped spinning, they could tell they were on land, _Earth_ , but in a building, small, wood, paper, human-made, bizarre, primitive machines-

Wait. Everything had started to clear; the sound – music – had softened and the lights had dimmed, their balance was once again stable, but… Pain, there was no _pain_. Instinctively their hand shot to their gem, it was whole, where was the crack? The crack that had been there and growing for millennia, the crack that always left them feeling on edge and always having to fight to keep their form in check.

The more they felt around it, the less they felt, there was only a smooth surface, and the sharp facets at its edge, but no crack, why?

Bixbite clawed at their own hair, pulling the soft, red strands until the familiar pain bloomed in their head, but it wasn’t familiar, it wasn’t _right_ ; it stung – not ached – and it was only on the top of their head – not pulsing just behind their eyes – they pulled tighter, desperately trying to find something familiar they could cling on to-

Movement drew their eyes back to the unknown gem, who halted from the force of the redhead’s glare.

Hands up, out, unarmed. A common pacifying gesture, the stranger spoke, their voice so soft it was barely audible over the music.

Safe.

They almost wanted to scoff – they were never safe – but this gem wasn’t giving off any aggressive intentions and they knew their name, so they would give them the benefit of the doubt for now.  Perhaps they were a Homeworld gem tasked with scouting the Earth looking for those who hadn’t gotten away in the retreat? But what was this place, why were they here?

“I know you must be really confused right now, but it’ll be ok, I promise. Do you remember anything?” the orange gem asked.

That was a good question, what _did_ they remember? Fighting, they remembered that, the chaos of the Earth battlefields, Gem against gem, sand and noise and blood and pain, but there was something after that, there had to be something, because they remembered the call to retreat. They didn’t want to retreat, there were still rebels to shatter and Bixbite was not like the other soldiers, they were not _weak_ , but their commander had ordered them and then physically dragged them to their ship.

But, they never got there, they were too strong, they were too wrathful; they broke free of grasping, pulling hands, they wanted to run back to the fight, bring more pain and destruction, like they were created to do.

Then… a noise… a… song? Bright, glaring light, then sand, then… nothing.

Bixbite fell to their knees, tearing at their hair, there had to be more than that! Searching for the missing pieces, they could feel the outlines of memory, but not see anything through the thick, oily sand that obscured them. There was more pain, certainly and something else… rage?

They clawed at the memories, but the harder they grasped, they quicker they sank into the quicksand of their mind.

Warmth in front of them brought them back to the real world, the unknown gem was crouching before them, hand hovering a short distance away. They wanted to scream, they wanted to threaten, they wanted this stranger to just _explain_ -

 A bang, they jerked their head to the sound, an explosion? No, too quiet, a weapon then, but what? Hammer, mace, ax-

“Citrine, we’re back! You’d better not have built a fort out of all our pillows again…”

Two new gems, one pink, short, heavily built, a soldier, gem located on forehead, expression shocked; the other, brown, tall, lithe, likely a non-combatant, gem on right should-

Star, a star outlined their gem, a symbol of the rebels, they were in a _rebel base._

Sand, they needed sand, right now! They called forward any grains in the area, but only gathered a pitiful handful, how was there _nothing_? Of course, they were inside, they had to get out, get out, find sand, destroy these traitors, those were the only orders they’d ever been given, they were going to carry them out, just as soon as they found some _sand_.

What they had wasn’t much, but it was enough to condense into a hard ball in their fist, they used all the strength of their mind to shoot it at the orange gem in front of them, launching them across the room and into a wall with a crash. Immediately they redirected the bullet of sand towards the other two, the pink one had already drawn her weapon – knuckledusters, a short range fighter – and was readying to punch the projectile headed her way, Bixbite waited until the very last second, then exploded the sphere from the inside, scattering sand into their enemies faces with enough force to leave a multitude of fine scratches.

Now that everyone was sufficiently distracted, the redhead leapt to their feet and darted to the wall with the window to the outside world, they couldn’t waste time trying to find a proper exit and the wall was so thin that the moonlight outside filtered through it; they dove through it with ease.

There was a short distance between the building they had just escaped and the line of trees that indicated a forest, they swiftly considered their next move – absently stretching their senses over the ground to gather up any tiny grains nearby – they could head into the forest, find some cover, but these rebels were bound to be familiar with the terrain, certainly more so than they were; besides, their battle style didn’t favour small, restrictive spaces, they needed distance for their massive, powerful attacks to be truly effective.

Shuffling feet behind them indicated that they had run out of time to plan, oh well, their instincts had never led them astray before and they had managed to collect plenty of sand to deal with three weak enemies.

Bixbite spun sharply, arms already dragging their weapon around them in a wide arc; the wave crashed against a single body, which was flung to the side easily, rolling to a stop a few yards away.

_The orange one, but where are the others?_

Their eyes fixed on the hole that had been left from their exit, but there was no movement. They must have left another way to flank them, they left a fine layer of sand across the entire clearing, as well as on the roof of the building and some of the nearby tree branches; if anything was disturbed, Bixbite would know.

For now, they would focus on the one in front of them, the one – Citrine, presumably – who was already back on their feet and crouched in a defensive position.

“I don’t wanna fight, we’re not your enemies, just calm down and we can talk!” they called.

Green eyes narrowed. The redhead didn’t bother indulging their pathetic attempts at trickery, they lifted an arm and pulled a column of sand with it, staring fixedly at the blond, even as they swung their hand down, a wave of gold smothering the orange and yellow form.

It didn’t keep them down for long, as soon as the barrage had stopped Citrine was crawling out of the artificial dune and was already darting away from the follow-up attack.

A whip of sand lashing against them knocked them to their feet, but they got back up.

“Please, just relax, we’re not gonna hurt you!”

A shimmering, golden wave slammed them back into the building, but they got back up.

“You’ve only just healed; you need to take it easy!”

Tiny flurries of sand grated against every exposed part of their skin, but they got back up.

“Argh, would you just, _stop_ , for a minute, I only wanna talk!”

Bixbite was panting heavily now, eyes darting around everywhere; the other two rebels hadn’t appeared, what were they planning, what was this one hoping to achieve, they weren’t making any attempt to attack, just running and defending and _distracting_.

Were they waiting for reinforcements? The other two going to call more of their allies to the battle, leaving this persistent insect to keep them busy. They should run.

 _No_ , they never ran from battle, they weren’t weak, they were made for this, they had to fight, they-

Suddenly, there were grasping hands on their thin arms, holding tight and burning hot against frigid skin. How had someone gotten so close without them noticing? Focusing their eyes, they took in the figure before them, the orange one – _Citrine_ – deep, blue eyes blazing and scattered freckles glowing with a strange light.

“Stop.”

The redhead was absurdly powerless to resist being pulled down onto their knees, the grip on their arms was loosened slightly, then slowly pulled away, gentle fingers trailing white fire along their skin.

The gem kneeling across from them let out a long breath, “Sorry, you looked like you were about to have a panic attack, don’t worry, I’m not going to hurt you, neither are the others, I asked them to stay back and let me talk to you. So, will you let me?”

Bixbite didn’t understand, they had them, they were vulnerable, why hadn’t this _fool_ taken them out the second they’d had the chance, what were they hoping to gain? But, maybe if they played along, they would find out.

They nodded, slowly, unsurely.

White teeth were bared, but not in a threatening snarl, instead Citrine was… grinning, at Bixbite. That was a first.

“Great! I know you must be really confused right now and I don’t really know everything, but I’ll explain what I can, first though; your name is Bixbite, right?”

They nodded again, more confidently this time, they let their face fall into its natural, blank expression; just because everything about this strange gem was throwing them completely off-balance, there was no need to let them know that. “And, you are Citrine?”

The blond grinned even wider and nodded eagerly, “Yeah, how’d you know that? I don’t remember telling you.”

“Your… ally called you by that name,” Bixbite said, “what is it that you want from me? I am not a gem of high stature, I have no information for your rebellion, nor would I give it if I did.”

Citrine’s grin fell like blast-doors on a ship, the redhead could almost hear the familiar clank. They brought a hand up to their face and scratched at their cheek – how had they not noticed those lines etched into them before – apparently their prediction of the rebels wanting intel was correct.

“Uhm, well, about that, uh… The war, it ended. Like… over five thousand years ago. Homeworld left and the rebellion saved the Earth.”

They didn’t move, couldn’t speak, of course they knew that the war was in its final stages and things hadn’t been looking good for Homeworld, they had even called a planet-wide retreat of any and all loyal gems; but, for them to have taken such a huge defeat was _unthinkable_. And, once again, they had been forgotten, left to erode on this worthless rock, the rock they had fought for, the rock Homeworld had _ordered_ them to fight for. Bixbite felt they should do something cry, scream, laugh… but they felt nothing, only contempt towards Homeworld, for its pitiful display of weakness.

“Are you ok? I know it’s a lot to take in-”

“So, there is no more war to fight, my people have abandoned me,” they said, more to themself than Citrine, “they will not come back for me, I have no purpose.”

And that was what truly stung, they had been created purely for battle, every part of their existence thus far had been conflict, after conflict, after conflict; all the resources put into creating a living weapon, all of Admiral Pyrite’s experimentations, all the time spent chipping away any part of them that stayed their hands in combat. None of that mattered, because they had been thrown away like they were _nothing_ and they _were_ nothing, nothing that couldn’t be recreated, stronger, faster, better, with every mistake made in their formation learned from and wiped clean.

They knew only war and with no war, without orders, without a battlefield to terrorise, without the knowledge that they were an ongoing experiment to create a perfect weapon… they had no reason to live.

They were nothing.

Suddenly, they were surrounded by fire, Bixbite tried to struggle free, but the scorching circle around them refused to budge, only tightening its grip, crushing the two bodies together.

“Hey now, you’re not nothing-” had they spoken that aloud? “-just because you don’t have to fight anymore, doesn’t mean you have no purpose, it means that now you can find a new one! Something that _you_ want to do, not ‘cause someone else told you that’s what you want to do, but because you really want to do it for yourself.”

Citrine carefully pulled back, enough to lock eyes with them, but still hover their hands over the redhead’s arms. “That’s what we were fighting for, it’s what being a Crystal Gem is all about, finding new paths for yourself and being free from the expectations others force on you!”

They opened their mouth to speak, but not a single thing came to mind.

“I’m not saying you have to join us, I just feel like you’ve never been given the option before and I wanted you to know there’s another path, if you want to take it. I’ll be there to help you, every step of the way.” They were grinning again, eyes gentle and… hopeful? Bixbite still didn’t understand, there had to be something more to their intentions than that, however – right now – the path being lit by a beaming face and warm sun seemed far more appealing than the one that radiated ice and danger.

“… Then, I will follow you, for now. Lead the way.”

\---


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A nice long chap here, and a little bit more backstory to boot! (quick note: ‘Brec’ here is short for Brecciated Jasper, shortened for obvious reasons pfft)  
> Enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

This was a delicate situation, they had to be careful how they dealt with this.

“Really? That’s great!” they yelled, already moving to wrap their arms around the slender gem before them.

They thudded into a hard wall of sand instead.

Groaning and rubbing at their sore nose, they pulled back, watching in mild fascination as the golden barrier trickled away into a pile of sand. Bixbite was glaring at them, not the deadly glare they had been fixed with when they had been fighting just now, but the softer type of glare, one that suggested annoyance more than killing intent.

Citrine could work with that, they’d already learned that touching was a no-no – at least when they weren’t having a panic attack. “Eheheh, sorry, I guess I should probably introduce you to the others… Uh, wait here for a sec while I go explain things to them, ok?”

A short nod looked to be all they would get from the quiet gem. Jumping to their feet and casually brushing off the more persistent grains stuck to their knees, the blond trotted back to the hole that had been left in the wall – not an unusual occurrence, the thin walls had been repaired so much there was probably nothing left of the original paper – and peaked their head through, two Crystal Gems were sitting at the table, Pietersite drumming their fingers on the wood nervously and Rhodochrosite looking agitated, with her arms and legs crossed.

They pushed through the hole, ripping the wall even further.

“Hey guys, don’t worry, everything’s calmed down now, I think we’re friends, or maybe we’re just acquaintances? But, Bixbite’s not gonna attack us anymore, well they might, they still seem kinda jumpy, but as long as we’re nice and calm and don’t do anything stupid I think it’ll be good, so be cool, ok guys? We just have to stay calm and be cool, we can do that! We’re always cool-”

Rhodochrosite raised an eyebrow. “Are you ok? Did you hit your head in the fight or something?”

“I just really want this to go well, did you see them? They’re really scared and confused, so I wanna help them but they’re so pretty! I can’t stop staring at them, do you think they noticed? What if I’ve really freaked them out?”

She rolled her green eyes and shook her head, “I’m sure it’s fine, they’ve probably got bigger concerns right now than you acting weird.”

Citrine made a strangled whine in the back of their throat, “So I _have_ been acting weird, oh no, what do I do? Should I apologise?”

The oldest gem stood up and walked over to their student, gently patting their shoulder. “What you should do right now is calm down and just be yourself; help them adjust, they’re going to have a lot of questions and this will be a learning experience for everyone,” they said, “how about you start by introducing us all and we can try and explain things to them.”

The blond nodded eagerly, that sounded like a good plan, “Ok!” They turned round to go back outside, but a sudden thought had them running back into the kitchen, flinging open cupboards and rummaging through piles of plates and bowls and cups.

“What are you _doing_?” Rhodochrosite asked from the table, frowning at the crockery being pulled out onto the counter.

“Looking for a- Aha!” they replied, finally locating their target behind all of the glasses.

She frowned at the large object held in their hands. “An… empty jar?”

Citrine nodded, before dashing back outside, to where the redheaded gem was still sitting in their pile of sand. They grinned reassuringly at them and then knelt down to fill the jar with the tiny grains and, when it was mostly full, they offered it to their new friend.

“Here, you can’t really bring all that sand inside, so you can keep some in this, to make you feel safer! Uh, not that we’re planning anything, but I just thought that maybe you might…”

Icy green eyes narrowed at them, before Bixbite raised a hand and, with an elegant flick of their wrist, drew some of the dune surrounding them into a swirling cloud, then clenched their fist tightly, the sand compacted into a gourd-like shape, not much bigger than the jar, they pulled a strap on their grey vest free and wrapped the stiff fabric securely around the dip of the gourd. When they stood up, the roughly textured sand container hung at their hip.

The orange gem watched in rapt fascination, but quickly came to; shaking their head as they leapt to their feet and grinned widely at Bixbite.

“Wow, that’s so cool! Guess you don’t need this then,” they said, debating whether to pour out the sand, they decided against it, more sand could only make them feel safer, right? They’d just keep it in the kitchen or something.

They started walking in the direction of the house, checking to see if the redhead was following, “Come on, I’ll introduce you to everyone, well not everyone, Labradorite is out at the moment – that’s probably a good thing though, they’re kinda unfriendly, but don’t worry! Once you get to know each other, you’ll get along great, you’re both quiet and stuff so you already have lots in common.”

Bixbite didn’t say anything, just slowly trailed behind them, once they reached the opening in the wall, Citrine poked their head through, mouthing at the others to get ready, before squeezing through the rest of the way, diligently ignoring the tearing sound.

They offered a hand to help the red gem through – which only earned them a glare – they watched Bixbite slip through the gap, effortlessly avoiding the sides and not causing any further damage; they were entranced at the graceful display, so much so that it took a pointed cough to bring them back to the present.

“Ah, right, Bixbite, these are my friends; Rhodochrosite-” she gave a small wave “-and Pietersite!” the brunet smiled gently and walked over to them.

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you, I don’t suppose you remember much of us?” they asked, holding out their hand expectantly.

The redhead stared at the offered limb suspiciously, “No.”

Pietersite stood awkwardly for a few more seconds, before dropping their hand and chuckling nervously, “Well, that’s to be expected, there was a lot of damage to your gem, not to mention the corruption.”

That seemed to get their attention. “Corruption?” they asked, haltingly.

The others glanced at each other, did they not know what had happened? This could be difficult to explain.

Citrine hovered a hand at their shoulder, but a sharp gaze stopped them from making actual contact. “Let’s… sit down for a bit, we’ll explain what we can,” the blond said, pulling away and gesturing to the table. Bixbite was slow to move and their eyes kept darting between the three gems – like they were expecting an attack any second – but they eventually joined them.

“Now, where to begin?” Pietersite said.

\---

Bixbite was eerily quiet.

They’d barely spoken since they’d sat down, just listening as Pietersite explained what had happened after the Homeworld retreat; occasionally they asked a question or requested clarification, but other than that they kept silent and utterly still, except for their sharp eyes, which flickered rapidly around the room.

It was frustrating, Rhodochrosite thought, but understandable. Everything about their actions suggested a military life, from their constant checking of the entryways to the room, to the chair they’d chosen to sit in – back straight and arms folded – at the farthest corner of the table; no doors or windows behind them and everyone else always in their line of sight, separated by a two-foot radius.

But, what was most annoying, was how blank their face was; it made them impossible to read and – as happy as she was for Citrine that they hadn’t wasted all of their hopes on someone who was never going to heal – the redhead was still an unknown and had already proven themself hostile.

She didn’t want anyone to get hurt, so she was staying alert and that certainly hadn’t escaped Bixbite’s attention.

“Well, I suppose that’s everything, do you have any more questions?” Pietersite asked, their normal gentle smile on their face, only _slightly_ too tight. The stranger shook their head slowly, shoulders hunching up just a hair.

The three Crystal Gems glanced at each other, silent conversation being passed, before Rhodochrosite finally got fed up of waiting. She leaned forwards in her seat, resting her clasped hands on the table – strange green eyes followed the movement – in the same kind, calm tone she liked to use on her patients, she started the interrogation.

“So, Bixbite, now that you’re caught up on everything, I think we would like to find out a little bit more about you.”

She hadn’t thought that they could get any tenser, but apparently she’d been very wrong; their hands clenched at their arms tight enough that she could see their knuckles turning white and visible scratches where their nails dug into their skin, the redhead’s shoulders started shaking ever so slightly and their chest was heaving unsteadily. In a complete reversal of their earlier body language, the second she had spoken Bixbite’s gaze had snapped to her own and not moved since, staring fixedly at her like she would strike at any second.

Citrine thankfully intervened before things got violent again, “Hey, hey, don’t panic, we’re not looking for intel or anything like that, we wouldn’t even have much use for it if we did, it’d be thousands of years out of date! We just wanna get to know you a bit better, find out more about what you like and stuff like that.”

Their hairless brows furrowed in… confusion?

“What we’re saying; is that we just want to learn more about you, as an individual,” she clarified, watching for any sign of understanding, there was none, “outside of the war, outside of Homeworld.”

Bixbite still looked thoroughly lost, “There is nothing outside of Homeworld, or war.”

Rhodochrosite glanced at the blond, who shook their head and gave her a sad grimace. “Well ok then, let’s just start with something simple, none of us really know much about Bixbites, could you tell us more about them?” she asked, voice still low and calm.

The redhead blinked; they still looked confused, but their body was starting to relax a little. “I’ve never met another Bixbite, all I know is what my creators told me; I am a living weapon, I was created for war and every part of my existence has revolved around it.”

She sighed, Citrine looked like they were about ready to burst into tears, it was probably time to call it off.

“Ok then, it’s been a long day, I think I’m going to get some rest; before I go, how are you feeling, any pain or discomfort, any disorientation?”

A pale hand rose to the heart-shaped gemstone, fingers brushing lightly across its smooth surface.

“No.”

Rhodochrosite gave a strained smile, “That’s good, if you notice anything, please let me know, I can’t guarantee that I completely healed the corruption, just stay on the lookout for any signs of it, alright?” she received a single nod. As soon as her bedroom door was shut softly behind her, she let out a sigh; she didn’t sleep very often, but right now being unconscious for a few hours sounded like paradise.

\---

The field had long been empty, but – to their minds eye – a great and chaotic dance was taking place.

That day, the sky had not been a clear, beautiful blue; it had been red and brown and black with smoke. That day, there was no gentle breeze playing the long grass like an instrument, the only music had been booming explosions and the grating screech of blade against blade and the chorus of agony coming together in song – the only song they had ever known, the song of war.

Labradorite didn’t know how long they had been sitting there, eyes unfocussed as long-gone spectres danced across their vision and long-forgotten voices cried out in rage and pain.

They knew they should leave, but as many times as they had told themself, _no more, never again, these battles will not haunt me any longer_ … they always found themself back here, watching and recalling and hating themself for their weakness.

Anyone else would have let go, everyone else _had_ let go. Citrine had been the most unprepared when the war first started, they were young, naive and hopeful – too hopeful, the older gem had always secretly thought, they had the kind of hope that would burn hot and bright, but quickly die out when confronted with true resistance, true horror, true despair.

But, it hadn’t, against all their expectations and with every tragedy, that hope had stayed blazing; as hot and bright as the sun and the force of that hope had even affected those around them, keeping the hope of the resistance longer than Labradorite could ever have imagined.

Rhodochrosite had been more suited to war, she was born a soldier, she had fought before, the iridescent gem had expected her to go far, even before the rebellion. And she had, her combat prowess was legendary among the rebels, even among Homeworld her name was feared; but despite all of that, she had never hardened – not like they had, becoming distant and more bitter than they cared to show.

But, she hadn’t, never losing the kindness and gentle touch that had made her beloved among her comrades, she had not hardened, no; she had tempered.

And Pietersite, well, they should never have even been directly involved in the war, they were an aristocratic gem, they belonged in a regal court – discussing with their fellow nobles what petty matters the Diamonds would deign to grant them governance over –  not on the dangerous, chaotic battlefields, not fighting against those who had been created to be below them, _less than_ them.

But, they had seen the cause of the rebellion and chosen to join them, running away from all they had known, to fight for what they believed in, because they saw the injustice they had helped commit and wanted nothing more than the chance to make things right, in whatever way they could.

Of course, none of them had come out of the war unscarred. Many close friends had been lost, shattered, corrupted and they had all things that would haunt them on those long, cold nights when everything was too quiet and there were no distractions from memories and fears. However, none of them seemed to be stuck in the past like Labradorite was, endlessly watching the same battles over and over and over and over and over and-

They pushed themself to their feet in one smooth movement, they couldn’t stay here any longer.

Closing their eyes didn’t help much – they could still hear the familiar song of war raging around them – but it was enough for them to start walking, then jogging, then running away; away from the song, from the screams, from the visions of long-lost friends, from the pained, fearful faces of their enemies in their last moments.

The warp pad was a welcome sight.

\---

Once they got back to Konoha, they immediately felt calmer; there was just something about the small, quiet town that had that effect on people. It was the closest they’d come to feeling at home since the rebellion started.

Asking a local shopkeeper for the date revealed that Labradorite had been gone for two days this time, longer than they had intended, but not unusual for them.

They sighed as their house came into view – slowly being revealed through the scattered trees at the edge of town – they were probably going to be facing another one of Pietersite’s rants about disappearing without telling anyone, when they got in, unless Citrine had done something stupid to distract them, in which case they might be able to sneak in unnoticed.

Listening at the door didn’t reveal much, they could only hear a muffled voice chatting excitedly – undoubtedly Citrine – and the quiet grunts and creaking trees that suggested Rhodochrosite was training in the garden.

Silently, they slid the door open; footsteps light and soundless as they slunk down the hall, ears sharp and keeping an eye out for any sign of angry brunets.

Citrine’s nattering got louder and louder as they reached the door to the living area, no one was replying to them though, were they talking to that damn lifeless gemstone _again_? Labradorite peaked their head around the doorframe to scan the room, no sign of Pietersite – thank the stars – just the back of the blindingly orange hoody Citrine favoured, their arms were flapping wildly as they tried to explain some point about how great eating was and why you should really try-

Suddenly, they could only see red, red hair, red clothes, red gem; they should have blended into the red sky behind them, but instead they stood out against it, long tails of their robe billowing out behind them as they stood aloft a hovering platform of sand.

They were distant – too far to see more than their slender silhouette – but Labradorite knew who they were, the rumoured geo-weapon Homeworld had put into action right at the onset of the war. They could single-handedly cause more damage than any squadron of quartz soldiers, bringing an entire desert crashing down onto the battlefield, crushing rebels and loyalists alike, shattering dozens, _hundreds_ of gems.

And all with a wild grin and manic laugh.

Labradorite had never seen anything like it; the indiscriminate annihilation, the attacks that swept away swaths of forest and left gashes on the very Earth itself.

They watched helplessly as their comrades charged, but they couldn’t move, they were frozen in place, their legs shaking so much they shouldn’t still be able to stand, but they were, they were still standing and watching as their two closest friends ran at the monster before them and were both swept away with the barest flick of the wrist – the gem as red and horrifying as blood didn’t even care to _look_ at them – and they couldn’t move, only watch as their allies were smothered and buried under the new, unnatural landscape.

Movement caught their attention, sand shifting and bubbling as those trapped beneath it struggled to the surface, a hand broke through the grains, a dark orange hand, Brec!

They took a single step forwards; they could still reach them, still save them and Fluorite too – the stubborn, loyal, loving idiot would never have let her go, no matter what – if they could just reach them-

But they didn’t.

The sand-wielding horror leapt off their platform, diving through the air like some of those strange Earth birds that rode the wind. As they reached the desert below them, they brought their hands forwards and, when they finally hit the ground – Labradorite still yards away from reaching the sand, from reaching their friends – the earth shook, shockwaves radiating out from the impact of the tiny body, sand crunching and compacting and crushing, the gem could only watch in dull shock as the arm they had been rushing to grab poofed out of existence.

The horrifying sound of cracking, splintering, _shattering_ stone was louder than anything they had ever heard, it had never stopped ringing in their ears, even as they dropped to their knees, even as they saw the monster dashing away – towards the blooming clouds of smoke that indicated another battlefield – sand following them, pulling away from the ground like a tide.

Nothing was left, only disturbed soil and ravaged trees, gem weapons littering the plane, scratched and bent and utterly useless.

Labradorite shuffled forwards, as they kicked at the dirt, specks of reflected light danced before their eyes. They knelt down where they had last seen their closest friend and gently scooped out a handful of soil; letting it trickle through their fingers until only jagged shards of red and purple and green remained.

Their hands shook and clenched – but they didn’t feel the familiar stab of sharp crystal, only their own nails digging into their palms.

Suddenly, there was no more smoke, no more distant screaming and no more devastated field, they felt a jolt run through their body as they came back to the present, but the rage and pain was still there, clawing at the back of their mind and letting them see only red, red, red.

And red had seen them too; their narrow eyes fixated on the white-haired gem, body tense and radiating hostility.

The standoff didn’t last for more than a few seconds, before a spear of sand was hurtling towards them, the monster out of their seat and dashing to the other end of the room, just in time to avoid the kunai flying towards their head.

Labradorite immediately followed up the attack with a second and a third, but they thudded uselessly into a wall of sand, which swallowed them up before shooting them back – red-hot and slicing through the doorframe with ease – the older gem dodged and was halfway towards the enemy when they were blocked by an orange screen. It was translucent, but solid, Labradorite knew they could easily break it if they wished, but the surprisingly hostile glare Citrine was sending them was enough to make them hesitate; they looked to them for an explanation, even as the abomination was pacing on the other side of the barrier, sand swirling around them uncertainly and occasional spike or ball being thrown at it, clearly they were trying to determine how strong it was.

The blond gem didn’t give them much time to think, they slipped through the wall – which opened up a hole just big enough to fit them – and casually sat down on the floor, patting the space next to them and giving the Bixbite a warm smile.

“C’mon, just relax and sit down, you too, stop looking so tense,” Citrine said, giving their teacher’s drawn weapon a pointed look

Holding up their hands and dispersing their kunai, the white-haired gem slowly crouched down, glare never leaving the stranger, who was still standing, body twitching and eyes darting around the room wildly; right now, they looked more like a nervous animal than the sadistic powerhouse they remembered, crushing and killing with ease.

After a few seconds in which it became obvious that the redhead wasn’t going to be joining them, Citrine sighed and turned back to their teacher. “So, Bixbite reformed!”

“I can see that.”

The glare they levelled at the monster resulted in their hackles raising and a low growl rumbling deep in their chest.

“Hey, calm down, we’re not gonna hurt you. Bixbite, this is Labradorite, I told you about them, they’re the other Crystal Gem living here, the paranoid one,” Citrine said soothingly. The white-haired gem felt the familiar urge to smack their own face; that was probably good, it meant that they were staring to calm down from their blood rage.

Slowly, the red gem seemed to calm down, enough for them to sit down at least – though they kept a fair distance from Citrine and kept their gaze between the other two gems.

“There, that’s better, see? Let’s just all stay nice and calm; Bixbite, why did you attack Labradorite?”

Pale hands fingers at their knees, shimmering fabric wrinkling from the movement. “They were going to attack me,” they eventually said, voice rough.

The blond raised an eyebrow at their teacher, wordlessly asking if it was true.

Labradorite ran a hand through their hair, they’d rather not talk about this in front of a stranger – and an enemy at that – but they also knew that their student wasn’t one to back down. “I… was remembering something. Seeing something that was not there, something which made me tense, angry, I suppose that my body language could have been interpreted as hostile.”

Immediately, Citrine backed down, they knew what they meant when they spoke about ‘seeing things’, even the other gem seemed to calm for a second, giving them a look that was almost… recognising?

It didn’t last for long though, quickly being replaced by that blank expression, then Bixbite was on their feet in a single graceful movement and out of the back door, before anyone could say anything.

The barrier cutting the room in half shattered into a mosaic of light, as the blond scurried to their feet and rushed after them, Labradorite groaned and dropped their head into their hands. This was not going to go well, they’d _known_ that the broken, corrupted, husk of a gem was the same one they’d seen on battlefields long ago, the same one that had taken the closest two friends they’d ever had; but knowing and accepting were two very different things and just knowing that the monster that had taken so much from them was alive and had somehow already wormed their way into one of their beloved student’s hearts was more than they could take right now.

They’d almost reached the front door when a gentle touch to their shoulder made them halt.

Turning to look down into Pietersite’s deep, brown, understanding eyes was more painful than they’d care to admit.

“I know it’s not going to be possible to forget – let alone forgive – but, I think that if you gave them a chance, they could surprise you. Remember; not a single one of us who fought in that war has come away with clean hands, all we can hope for, is the opportunity to learn how to live and love again.”

Brown and mismatched grey-and-red met in a long, silent exchange, then Labradorite turned and ran to the nearest warp pad – right now, they needed to be somewhere they could remember.

\---

Branches slashed at their arms and legs as they ran, desperately searching for any sign of red amongst the green and grey.

It didn’t take them long, after only a few minutes they caught up to Bixbite, who was huddled against a wide tree trunk, knees drawn up to their chest and hands clenching at their hair once again – Citrine was starting to worry about that habit – low growling almost covering them muttering under their breath.

The blond approached slowly, raising their hands in a calming gesture when those uncanny green eyes snapped to their own blue ones.

“It’s just me, just calm d-”

“No!”

Citrine blinked at the shout, that was easily the loudest they’d ever heard the other gem speak.

Hands ripped at red curls even harder, as though they were trying to rip their own skull open, but the black-rimmed glower stayed fixed. “Stop, why are you doing this, I don’t, what do you want, I’m a, you can’t understand, _why_ \- No! Don’t come near me!”

They stopped inching closer; crouching a few feet away, Citrine pulled their hands back too, just to be sure. “Ok, ok, I’m staying here, I just want to help you-”

“You wouldn’t if you knew, you know _nothing_ about me, not like the other one, they know, they know,” Bixbite’s voice alternated between deep and threatening and high and scared mid-sentence. they didn’t know what to do, clearly they weren’t in a right frame of mind, but they weren’t listening and they were so much more guarded than they had been the last time they’d had to talk them out of a panic attack.

“I know enough; I know you fought for Homeworld, but that’s in the past now; you don’t have to be like that anymore, you can be like us now,” they said, physically having to restrain themself from just leaping across the distance between them and holding the redhead close until they calmed down.

A chuckle – dark enough to make the hairs at the back of their neck stand on end – filled the air, distorting the next words spoken, “I can never be like you, I am a monster, the other one knows it, they’ve seen the beast and they fear it, they could never accept me, you don’t know, don’t understand, if you knew you’d fear me too, like you should, like the other.”

Citrine gritted their teeth; this was getting too much, why did everyone seem to think they were so stupid that they hadn’t realised the gem who had once fought for Homeworld had probably done some terrible things in the past? They weren’t as naive as everyone assumed, they knew that rehabilitating a dangerous Homeworld soldier wouldn’t be easy – for Bixbite, or everyone who’d been hurt by their past misdeeds – but if they just accepted that they could never change and didn’t even deserve the chance to try, then how were they any different from the ones they’d fought to escape?

“You can change, I know you can, because so did I, everyone who joined the rebellion had to change at some point; or else they never would’ve been able to fight for what was right,” they said, keeping their gaze steady on Bixbite, “I know it’s going to be hard and you might never be able to really make up for everything you’ve done, but you can’t just give up at the first hurdle! You’re not alone here, I want to _help_ you, just… trust in me a little, please?”

Those pale – beautiful – icy eyes widened more with every word, Citrine could barely focus on keeping their face calm, but, eventually, they returned to a more natural size, “I don’t know how to trust.”

The blond smiled, “That’s ok, you don’t have to trust in me completely, just, trust me not to attack you, alright?”

Bixbite’s hands clenched a little tighter in their hair, before slowly loosening their grip and dropping to their sides.

“Alright.”

\---


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now we're starting to get a bit more development and backstory! The bit near the end on the chap was pretty darn hard for me (cause I'm aro and have no idea how to explain romance cause I don't even really get it meself tbh) but Spell helped me find some descriptions and I think I managed to do pretty well despite myself, though writing Bixbite's complete inability to get it was nice and easy ~~demi Gaara is everything~~ oh and thanks for all the love on this fic! Honestly y'all are the sweetest and I love ya!  
>  Enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

The first few days were unbearably tense; Bixbite was withdrawn and rarely spoke – even when directly spoken to – Labradorite had disappeared to who-knows-where and was yet to come back, Rhodochrosite had made a few attempts to start a conversation with the new addition to their household, but with little luck and Pietersite had mostly been panicking about making a space for Bixbite to call home, until they decided where they wanted to live, but most of the time they chose to stay outside, wandering the forest alone.

Even Citrine’s attempts to build a bond were only marginally successful, the red gem would humour them for a few minutes, then walk away, telling the blond to leave them alone.

They groaned as they slumped down onto the patio, flopping down on Rhodochrosite’s lap and groaning even louder into her legs. She made an annoyed grunt and pushed them off with a single finger.

“Crazy idea here; if they don’t want to talk to you, you could just not talk to them,” she said, leaning over the edge of the porch to look at her friend lying face-down on the ground.

Citrine moaned into the dirt, before lifting their head to stare mournfully up at her, “But, how else am I gonna make friends with them?”

“Sometimes people just need a bit of space. They’ve been through a lot lately, just give them time to sort things out for themself, no offense, but you can be pretty full-on when you’re trying to be friendly, you might just be scaring them off – like what happened with Obsidian.” That last comment was barely audible, her face twisting painfully at the thought of their lost friend.

The blond frowned and sat up quickly.

They didn’t really want to think of them right now, but, as painful as it was, they had to admit that Rhodochrosite had a point. The nervous, violent, withdrawn redhead wasn’t all that dissimilar from an angry, vengeful, detached, dark-haired gem they had once known, long ago.

It hadn’t gone well the last time they had tried to force friendship on someone like that, but they still felt hopeful about Bixbite; they’d already opened up more in a week, than Obsidian had in decades.

“…I guess you’re right, I’ll back off a little bit, but I don’t think leaving them completely alone is gonna help much either, it’s just so hard trying to find the right balance,” Citrine said, pulling themself back onto the light, wooden patio. “Thanks for the advice though, you’re so smart!”

Rhodochrosite made a comment about not needing to be told that and lightly punched their arm, but the blond could see that her efforts were half-hearted, at best.

“Hey, don’t worry about it, what happened with Sid, it’s not your fault, neither of us could have stopped it,” they said gently, hugging an arm around her shoulders.

She let out a breath as she leaned into them. “I know, I just…”

They squeezed her a little tighter, before jumping to their feet and holding out a hand to the surprised gem. “Don’t worry,” they stated firmly, “we’re going to bring them back one day, I can feel it! C’mon, lets train, I’m so pumped up right now,” Citrine said, grinning wide.

Rhodochrosite chuckled and clapped her hand into Citrine’s, “Yeah, I’d like to see them try and stop us!”

\---

Surprisingly, Bixbite was the one who came to them. The blond had been hiding out in the forest – another prank gone awry had Pietersite on the warpath – sitting on a sturdy branch and keeping their eyes and ears open. But, despite that, the redhead had somehow managed to sneak up on them so silently that they had screamed and fallen off their perch; crashing painfully through every branch on the way to the nice, hard ground.

“So, what can I do for you?” they asked the delicate, sandaled feet that had landed gracefully next to their head.

There was a long pause, long enough for Citrine to push themself into a sitting position and rub at their aching nose and forehead and chest and… well, everywhere really. Once they’d checked themself over – nothing to worry about, they’d ache for an hour or so but that’s all – they looked expectantly up at Bixbite, who was standing utterly still and staring down at them with their usual blank expression.

“Uh-”

“You have deviated from your usual behaviour; it’s been five days since your last attempt at communicating with me, what is the meaning of this?”

Citrine wasn’t sure if they sounded more angry or confused, but they didn’t seem to be particularly volatile right now, so that was something. “Well, I thought that my constant talking to you might be getting on your nerves and Rho mentioned you might be getting annoyed with me pestering you so much,” they said.

They’d honestly thought that the redhead would’ve been happy to be left alone for a while, had they actually been enjoying their company? Citrine couldn’t stop the smile that wanted to break out on their face, at that thought.

“I was.”

Ah, well, that stopped it.

Bixbite finally sat down opposite them, arms and legs crossed defensively. “However, I was under the impression that you were going to… befriend me. My limited knowledge on the matter, indicates that regular social contact is required.”

The blond ran a hand through their hair – sharp, green eyes following the movement suspiciously – and tried to think of the best way to proceed. On the one hand, they were glad that the red gem seemed willing, if not eager, to pursue a friendship with them, but, on the other, they really didn’t want them to be pushing themself to do something they weren’t comfortable with.

That had been the thing that had driven away Obsidian, they couldn’t make the same mistake twice.

“That’s… that’s not how it works. I want to be your friend and I hope that you might want to be mine too, but friendship isn’t formed just by spending a certain amount of time together,” they explained, growing ever more apprehensive at Bixbite’s deepening frown.

“Then how does ‘friendship’ happen?”

Stars, they really knew how to ask the difficult questions. “Uh, well when you talk or just spend time doing things together, you generally find things you can relate to each other about and things that you can enjoy doing together. It can’t be forced; it’s just something that comes naturally from enjoying someone’s company,” they _really_ didn’t think they were explaining this very well.

The redhead still looked confused, “And, how do you know if you are enjoying someone’s company?”

“I guess, you just find yourself wanting to spend more time with them, maybe you sometimes think about them when you’re alone, you remember things about them and want to know how they’re doing when you next meet? I don’t know, it’s kinda hard to explain, it’s just something you have to… feel.”

Bixbite’s expression went blank and the way their eyes glazed over, ever so slightly, suggested that they were trying to decipher what they were feeling right now.

They stayed quiet to let them think, but it wasn’t very long before they were focussed back on the present and staring hard at the blond. “What if your, feelings, are conflicted on the matter?” they asked, they paused around the word ‘feelings’, as though it was their first time saying it.

“That’s fine, sometimes feelings are just confusing,” Citrine said, then, a sudden thought came to them. “How about this; we don’t have to hang out every single day, but when you feel up to it you can come and find me, I’ll show you some things I like to do with my friends and all the cool stuff on Earth! That way you can try it out and see if you actually do want to be friends with me, while you’re working your feelings out.”

The red gem blinked, but after a few moments gave a single nod, “That arrangement is acceptable.”

“Yeah! Do you wanna hang out now? We can go watch a movie or, oh! I can take you to Ichiraku’s, they do the best ramen in the world, or-”

They were cut off by the swish of fabric and the short, willowy figure walking away between the trees. “Ah, right, not now, sorry! I’ll see you later, I guess, bye!”

Citrine didn’t feel put out by the rejection, at least they seemed to be making some progress. They grinned to themself as they folded their arms behind their head and started making their way back to the house, whistling as they walked.

“There you are, you little brat!” The familiar screech sent chills down their spine, as did the brunet suddenly emerging from behind a tree; Citrine turned tail and ran.

\---

Citrine watched the gem poking warily at the bowl before them with their chopsticks.

It had taken a lot of convincing to get Bixbite into town – let alone sitting down at the tiny stall selling the greatest food ever conceived – but constant reminders that no human was going to be a threat to them had eventually worn down their anxieties.

Getting them to actually _try_ the delicious ramen was another matter altogether though.

“C’mon, how do you know you don’t like it if you’ve never tried eating before?” they whined, lamenting over their new friends lack of such a wonderful experience.

Bixbite glared at them, then at the steaming broth. “I do not understand the logic behind this, our gem already contains all the energy we need to sustain our forms; we have no use for ‘food’,” they said, once again prodding the softening noodles with their chopsticks.

“You don’t eat for energy, you eat because it tastes so good!” The blond wondered if they perhaps needed a demonstration, they lifted their own bowl and swallowed the entire thing in almost one bite – a skill that was often called impressive by the old man who owned the stall and disgusting by everyone else.

“That’s disgusting,” Rhodochrosite’s voice was annoyed, but not to the point that she was likely to punch them, “don’t let them bully you into trying it, Bixbite, I don’t like eating either.”

The redhead’s frown only deepened as they swirled the ramen around the bowl.

“I’m not bullying! I’m just saying that trying one bite won’t hurt them, what if they actually really love eating, but they never find out because they never tried?” Citrine was probably being far too pushy – but they got so passionate about ramen, they just _had_ to try and spread the joys of eating it with a friend to everyone they knew! Even if, so far, only Pietersite had ever taken up the hobby.

Rhodochrosite looked like she was about to argue, but the red gem slowly lifting a single noodle quieted her.

Everyone stared as they gingerly sniffed at it – nose crinkling slightly – then they dropped it and delicately picked up one of the pork slices instead, bringing it up and gingerly placing it in their mouth. There was a long awkward moment, before Citrine felt they should say something.

“You should probably chew,” they explained, taking a bite from their second bowl to demonstrate.

Bixbite warily copied the motion, jaw flexing as they worked their way through this new experience; after a minute in which it became obvious that they weren’t going to stop, the blond helped them along again.

“And then swallow.” A hard look to reminded them exactly how new to this the redhead was, had them quickly elaborating, “Umm, by pushing it down your throat?”

Bixbite swallowed, face twisting strangely as the food travelled down their oesophagus; a slight cough seemed to get trapped in their throat, but it was quickly chocked back. The redhead glared at the bowl thoughtfully.

Citrine couldn’t wait any longer, “Well? How was it?” they asked excitedly.

“Eating is… uncomfortable,” the red gem eventually said.

“Yeah I guess I can understand that, if you’re not gonna finish that can I have it?” The bowl was pushed toward them immediately. Bixbite still looked unnerved, but maybe just a _little_ bit satisfied with themself for trying something new.

\---

“Why are they going to such lengths? Everything is against them, it would be easier to just accept fate.” Bixbite frowned as they watched one of the figures on the small, primitive projection device dash towards the ‘airport’ – whatever that was.

Over an hour into this ‘movie’ that Citrine had sat them down to watch and they were even more lost than when it had started.

“That’s the point! Everything’s against them, but they’re willing to fight to be together, because they love each other so much,” the blond explained, shushing them as the music swelled and the two humans who had had the most attention given to them saw each other from across the room and ran into each other’s arms; was this a strange form of human wrestling? They didn’t seem to be causing much damage though and they’d each missed twenty good openings while they were busy making ineffectual grabs at each other’s hands and faces.

Tears were spilling from Citrine’s eyes, “Oh my stars, it’s so beautiful!” they wailed, pulling a tissue from the box on the table.

The weapon’s frown deepened even further. “I don’t understand; hardship is beautiful?”

“No! Their _love_ is beautiful,” Citrine said, staring at them in shock, “Were you even paying attention? Didn’t you see how desperate they were to be together, even when Junko’s mother hated the idea and Tadashi’s job was about to force him to move away? But their love was stronger than the hardship and just look at how happy they are to be together now!”

Bixbite glanced back at the TV, the two humans known as Junko and Tadashi were pushing their mouths together and crying and laughing, then they faded away and human writing started scrolling up the screen.

They didn’t see it; they didn’t even know what it was they were supposed to be seeing.

“But, they were always together, they spent significantly more time together than any other pair of humans in the whole movie,” they said, trying to parse some insight from the strange form of ‘entertainment’.

“Not together like in the same room, _together_ together.”

That was less than helpful. “What other way of ‘being together’ is there, than being in approximate vicinity of each other?”

Citrine’s mouth opened and shut a few times and a burnt orange blush settled across their freckled cheeks – Bixbite wasn’t sure what to make of it, but they decided to just wait for them to articulate their thoughts.

“Well, uh, y’know… Together, as a couple, in a relationship,” they eventually said, eyes darting around in discomfort.

“But, any two individuals who are acquainted with each other already have a relationship.”

The blond coughed and brought their hand up to rub at the back of their neck. “I mean, technically that’s right, but this is different! This kind of relationship is more like… you know when you just really want to be together, y’know?”

It wasn’t often that Bixbite wished to be able to express an emotion, but right now they dearly hoped that Citrine was picking up on their impatience at these oblique explanations.

“You, don’t know?” the orange gem asked, voice suddenly lower pitched than it had been before.

“If I did, I wouldn’t be asking you.”

Citrine sighed, the look in their eyes was the same one they’d given them anytime the weapon had referred to themself as such, or when they mentioned anything about the war. Bixbite didn’t like that look, it made them… feel. Feel what, they weren’t sure, but, whatever it was, it wasn’t pleasant.

“Ok, how can I describe it… Has there ever been someone you knew who you really liked?” the blond asked. “Someone you wanted to spend all your time with and who made you feel like you could accomplish anything, if it would make them happy?” a pained look flashed across the orange gem’s face, but it was gone in less than a second.

Bixbite shook their head.

 “Or even if you didn’t know them at all, just someone you’d seen who you felt the desire to talk to, get to know better, be, um, physically close to?”

Another strange look, with a deep blush and lower lip pulled between white teeth; Citrine had directed it at them a few times before and they were no closer to understanding it now than they had been the first time. But, the younger gem’s expressions were incomprehensible at the best of times and right now they were more focused on trying to grasp this ‘relationship’ business that had them so confused.

The redhead didn’t need to think about the question, “No.”

Their face fell. “Never? That’s really, I mean, not even a little bit?”

Bixbite glanced away, scowling at the TV – which had started playing an empty mass of black and white dots and lines – yet another, apparently normal, part of life that they’d never been privy to, only ever looking in on that existence from the outside.

“Not that there’s anything wrong with that! There are plenty of people who don’t feel attraction and you don’t have to be in a relationship, some people just want to be; it’s fine if you don’t.”

Their words and expression were cheerful, but something in their tone of voice made Bixbite feel like the blond was lying, or at least hiding something. “And… this is normal, for both humans and gems?”

It was frustrating to be struggling so much with this, they had always been expected, by both their superiors and themself, to pick up on new concepts immediately and they’d always been quick to learn in the past; they had to be, when they weren’t they were disciplined. But now they were opposed – by their own lack of socialisation – for the first time in their life and it was revealing their deficiencies, slowly eroding at their absolute confidence in their worth as a weapon, because now that there was no call for a weapon, they had nothing else to rely upon and nothing to help them cognise these things that they had only ever seen at a distance and never thought to be useful.

“No! It’s common, but that doesn’t mean it’s normal; look, romance is a really complicated concept and I’m not great at explaining this sort of thing. If you really want to know more about it maybe ask Pietersite? They’re great at teaching,” the orange gem said confidently, “but just don’t worry about it too much, you have plenty of time to learn at your own pace.”

Frustrating, but perhaps not impossible.

\---

They had thought on it for almost a week, before finally taking Citrine’s advice and seeking out the older, wiser gem.

Silently, they pushed open the door, eyes automatically scanning the new environment for entries, exits and defensive positions. The room was simple and small, most of the space taken up by bookcases – Bixbite recognised a few gem artefacts and tomes scattered amongst the human ‘novels’ and textbooks – and a simple desk, which the brunet was currently sitting at, pouring over a thick book.

The weapon slipped into the room, shutting the door softly behind them and waited for Pietersite to notice them – quietly taking note of their apparently lacking observation skills – after a few minutes with no reaction to their presence, they coughed.

Pietersite jumped and spun round in their chair, staring at the intruder for a long moment before they seemed to recognise them. “Ah, Bixbite? Did you need something?”

“What is romance?”

The brunet’s mouth gaped open and their brows knitted, they looked completely lost, perhaps they should elaborate. “Citrine showed me a ‘movie’ which left me with questions; their explanations were lacking,” they continued, watching the older gem for any sign of understanding.

“Oh, well, that’s a big topic, how about we both sit down and you can tell me what it is, specifically, that has you confused?” they said, gesturing to the small, low table with cushions placed on each side. Bixbite warily followed them and dropped to their knees on one while Pietersite did the same on the other. “So, how about we start with something a bit simpler? What was it about this movie that you want explained?”

There were many questions that they wanted answered, but they could appreciate that taking things one at a time would make the process easier overall – even if they were annoyed at the inefficiency of the method.

“There are apparently differing… levels of relationship, what are they and what are the differences between levels?”

\---

It had been over an hour and they were experiencing the sinking feeling that they had still only just scratched the surface of interpersonal connections.

They knew the terms, they had been told the general concepts and structures, but they still lacked that clear understanding that everyone else seemed to possess. “Why do you seek them out? What benefits are there to ‘relationships’ that cannot be gained from friendship?”

Pietersite tapped a finger to their chin and hummed as they thought, “I suppose, it differs for different people; some people want relationships for the physical aspect that is usually deemed inappropriate between friends – though not always – others like the feeling of having that special person who they can always count on and trust, or caring for someone so deeply that you can’t imagine life without them, having someone who can make you smile just with their presence. It’s… complicated, emotions and relationships aren’t logical, I’m afraid, they’re confusing and messy and aren’t always what’s best for you.”

The redhead frowned and tried to grasp the strings of understanding that would lead to knowledge, but they always slipped through their fingers at the last second. They decided to push past that topic, it was too broad and unfamiliar to find any real foothold, they’d just have to think about it more by themself later.

“Citrine seemed to be very invested in the relationship of two other people, is that normal?”

The older gem laughed and shook their head slowly, “That’s just how they are, they like seeing others happy and are a bit of a hopeless romantic,” they said, “and those sorts of stories seem to remind them of-” suddenly they cut off and their gaze darted to the hands clasped in their lap.

“Remind them? They were in a, relationship?” Bixbite asked, watching the other gem closely.

“Well, yesss, they were, but… she’s been gone for- No, I shouldn’t say anymore, sorry, it’s their business, if they want you to know then they’ll tell you themself.” Pietersite offered a smile, but stayed firm on their stance – despite the hard glare demanding that they explain.

After a long stand-off, the redhead finally relented; instead changing tactics, “What about yourself?”

They blinked and a light blush grew on their scarred cheeks. “M-me? No, I’m not in a relationship,” they said, stutter indicating severe nervousness, _were they lying?_

“You seem to have a lot of expertise for someone who has no experience.”

“I’ve got experience! But, that was a long time ago, right now I’m quite happy being, alone,” their voce dropped as they got to the end on their sentence; Bixbite wasn’t sure what to think about it, or what the proper course of action would be, so they just kept up their normal unrelenting stare.

It took a full minute before the brunet broke, but they were suddenly very eager to talk, apparently. “Ok, so maybe I’m not completely happy, I must admit I do miss being with someone like that, but it’s not like there’s anyone who I could be with, humans are just too short-lived, I couldn’t cope with becoming so close only to have them die after a few decades, but the only gems here are Citrine and Rhodochrosite – which, no, they’re my _students_ , that would just be wrong and uncomfortable – or Labradorite…”

Their blush darkened significantly, “Well, they are very, appealing, I suppose and they would certainly be better than the others, but they’re just so closed off and I don’t think they’d even be capable of being with someone as long as they’re still so wrapped up in the past and-”

Again they cut themself off harshly. The redhead was somewhat relieved; they’d completely lost the conversation once they started rambling.

Blushing, Pietersite gingerly scratched at their neck – a nervous gesture from what the younger gem had observed thus far – and chuckled quietly, “Sorry, I was just venting there, I’m sure you don’t want to hear any of that.”

Bixbite nodded, because they didn’t really know what else to do.

“So, did you have any more questions for me?” they asked, composing themself and giving the weapon their gentle smile.

They thought on it for a moment, before finding one last thing they hadn’t had explained. “How do you know when you… like someone?”

“Hmm, well, that can vary between people and it depends on what type of ‘like’ you’re thinking of. When it’s a platonic – friendship – attraction, you may find yourself enjoying their company, wanting to seek them out and interact with them, but not necessarily touch them or trust them with yourself completely.

“Romantic bonds though…” their voice changed again, softer this time and their eyes unfocussed, “they tend to be more physical, you may want to hug, or kiss them, being around them might make your stomach feel light and tingly at the same time – butterflies, humans call it – your chest might feel tight whenever you look at them and you find yourself thinking of them all the time; even when they’re not with you, you feel better, just knowing that they’re out there somewhere.”

Pietersite shook their head and returned their gaze to the gem opposite them. “Like I said, most of this is the sort of thing you have to _feel_ and it’s difficult to put into words, but don’t worry too much if you still don’t understand it, there are plenty of people out there who don’t and you’ve got plenty of time to figure this out.”

They gave a sharp nod, then stood and turned away in one smooth movement, heading towards the door, but, just as they were raising their hand to open it, the brunet’s calm voice called out to them again.

“Bixbite, just relax, you can always come back if you need anything answered. Learning how to recognise how you feel is going to take time; just, don’t fight your feelings when they come.”

\---


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it’s been such a wait for this chap! Basically life, work, trying to sort out uni and good ol’ depression got in the way and my ability to string together more than 10 words at a time has been severely hampered. I can’t promise that updates are gonna get any more regular, cause I honestly have no idea, but don’t you worry, I’m looking after myself and the ever-lovely Spell is doing a wonderful job keeping me enthusiastic about this project (and also giving me some great advice/research/help for certain parts of this chap!) I cannot thank you enough deary! And to everyone who’s been giving such lovely feedback on this! y’all make my year every time I see something new I swear.  
> Anyways, hope you enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

It was nice up here, Citrine decided, though they wished it weren’t so cold.

Above them, the sky was a deep, inky blue, beautiful full moon lighting a few ghostly clouds in shades of white and purple and hundreds of stars twinkling away – though not as many as there had once been, humans were great and all, but their cities and pollution had made stargazing somewhat less impressive over recent decades.

But, the thing that _really_ made this a pleasant experience; was the figure sitting next to them, staring up at the view before them and dyed blue, purple and silver in this light.

They sighed contentedly and turned their gaze back to the stars.

Bixbite was still a mystery to them, to be honest. They were clearly making an effort to learn and understand this ‘friendship’ thing that they’d missed out on their entire life, but it was slow going and they still didn’t seem to trust anyone yet – they never went anywhere without the small gourd of sand attached to their hip and when Labradorite had finally returned from their two-week long escape, Bixbite had decided to take _their_ turn to disappear for a few days, until the blond had managed to track them down, talk them back and even get both gems in the house at the same time; not in the same room though.

Other than that though, things seemed to be slowly improving.

“It’s strange, isn’t it? Seeing Homeworld be so tiny and insignificant,” Citrine said, staring at the pinpoint of white that was easily mistaken for a star from so far away.

The redhead’s eyes shifted to glance at them. “It’s hardly insignificant, certainly not to this planet.”

“Well, yeah, in the past maybe, but right now… It’s just another dot in the sky, no more important or interesting than any of the other dots in the sky, we’re the only ones who can even remember any reasons to care about it.” Citrine lifted a hand and pinched their fingers until they were holding their old home between them.

Bixbite looked disinterested, as usual, but their eyes were still fixed on the blond, indicating that they were giving them their full attention.

The orange gem squeezed their fingers together, watching as the tiny flickering light disappeared; they snorted and dropped their hand, folding it behind their head to join the other one.

“I was made there, you know, Homeworld’s Omega kindergarten,” the blond said, glancing at Bixbite for any sign of recognition. They were shocked to see the soldier actually _emoting_ ; beautiful eyes wide with pure shock, mouth dropped open slightly and head snapped round to look them fully in the face, rather than out of the corner of their eye like they had been before.

Citrine slowly sat up, carefully looking for any sign that their friend was about to flee, or attack. The Omega kindergarten wasn’t one that was very well known, but those who did know about it weren’t likely to ever hear anything good.

It wasn’t like the normal ones – spewing out hundreds and thousands of burly quartz soldiers, or a few carefully cultivated aristocratic gems – Omega was a place of experimentation and research, it was where new gem types were developed and tested for their usefulness, where new growing and development techniques were thought up and trialled. Citrine didn't much like to remember what it was like there; the constant observation and rigorous experiments, being judged at every moment, the feeling of expectation that you would fail and disappoint everyone above you, the fear of becoming obsolete, worthless.

But, they also didn’t like to hide their heritage either; as much as they hated everything about their kindergarten and as much as they hated the culture that built it, it was still a large part of them. They had lived through it and come out stronger, they weren’t going to hide that, even if it made other gems uncomfortable.

They stared hard at Bixbite – though they were careful to keep their expression calm – and waited for their reaction.

Eventually, the redhead broke out of their shock; eyes focussing back on Citrine, darting between their face and their gem, faint orange glow easily visible in the night. They raised a hand to their own gem, fingers gliding over the surface before drifting up to grip tight at their hair. “You, you were made… but that’s- how can you be so… different?” they breathed, words almost inaudible they were so fragile and brittle in the still air.

Citrine frowned for a moment, before the realisation hit them, “You too?!” They jolted forwards, hand reaching to grasp at Bixbite’s arms, but they jerked back at the sudden movement – sand spilling out of their gourd and hovering in a protective barrier between them.

The blond took a deep breath and shuffled back a few feet.

“Sorry, sorry, I didn’t mean to do that, I just, I’ve never met anyone else-”

“I’m not talking about it,” Bixbite snapped, sand shield dispersing enough for them to glare into the blue eyes opposite them.

They raised their hands in a calming motion and smiled as genuinely as they could with their mind still reeling from the implication that they weren’t as alone as they thought they’d been. The young gem wished that their friend was more open, they desperately wanted to talk about this new, unexpected connection between them.

But, that clearly wasn’t going to happen – not while Bixbite was in this state – they sat back on their hands, unsure what to do next, would trying to change the subject help them calm down? Or, were they simply too agitated right now to get back into normal conversation?

The dilemma was quickly taken out of their hands, as the redhead shakily rose to their feet and, without a word, darted off the roof and disappeared into the trees.

Citrine sighed and slumped down onto their back, seeing the hazy clouds drift across the silver moon and blot out twinkling stars. A wide grin pushed its way onto their face, they still couldn’t believe it; all those millennia thinking they’d never find another Omega gem and suddenly one just drops into their life out of thin air! They were going to respect Bixbite’s privacy of course, but just knowing this about them already helped them understand the mysterious warrior more – just a little – and that there was someone else out there who could understand them made them feel less alone than they had since the end of the war.

The blond smiled as they watched a bright, green shooting star flash across the sky for a split second, before fading quietly into the night.

\---

“Does it look even?” they called, arms stretched wide apart, as they held up a wide banner to the building – stretched in the literal sense, they’d had to shapeshift to make the distance.

“Yes?” Well that didn’t sound very convincing, but they decided to just go with it, they could always fix it if they were off.

Awkwardly they tried to nail the two ends of the fabric to the wooden frame, while also not dropping either the fabric, the nails, or the hammers. They’d managed to get the nail in their right hand into the correct position, but in their distraction, they had apparently lost their grip on the one in their left hand. They cursed lightly, as hopelessly trying to catch it without actually moving their hand just made them drop the loosely-held hammer in their right hand.

Citrine groaned and bashed their head against the wall. This really should not be so difficult-

They squeaked when four nearly simultaneous swishes shot past their ears and a miniscule gust alerted them to something moving _very_ fast. Then there were several thuds, and they saw four nails imbedded deep into the wood – one right in-between their fingers, they didn’t want to think about how much that would’ve hurt had it been just a few centimetres off – and holding the fabric in place.

Grinning, they gingerly released the banner and took a hesitant step back; nothing, the nails held firm and the heavy material did little more than sway in the light breeze. With a sigh of relief, Citrine finally released their stretched form, shrinking back to a regular height and shaking out their limbs to regain some feeling in them.

“Thanks! Man, you’re really handy to have around for this sorta thing,” the blond said, smiling at Bixbite and turning around to admire their work.

Ok, that banner was definitely _not_ even.

\---

Rhodochrosite had been in the middle of training when a now-familiar redhead had appeared on the porch – out of nowhere apparently, because they certainly hadn’t been in the house earlier – she had paused and waved uncertainly, but after getting no response she shrugged and silently resumed her drills.

Really, she was just punching and kicking at the air, since Pietersite had forbidden her from practising against the forest trees just outside their home.

Just because she’d made an unnatural clearing or six, killjoy.

Normally it wouldn’t be a problem, since she could always train with one member of the household or another, but today Pietersite was off investigating a potential lead on gem activity, Labradorite was sleeping on the couch – and trying to wake them would’ve been more pointless than trying to raise the dead – and Citrine had decided to actually take the odd-jobs that the humans in the town had given them seriously for once and was currently running around Konoha helping to set up decorations for an upcoming festival.

Though that was probably _why_ they were so eager to help everyone all of a sudden; the last festival they’d gone to, the blond had caused so much chaos and destruction that they’d been banned from attending another one, for life. Apparently they were trying to work their way into the towns good graces again.

Rhodochrosite had the sneaking suspicion that it had something to do with the pretty little redhead currently staring her down.

“Can I help you with something? Citrine’s in town today, I’m sure it won’t be hard to find them,” she said when the blank gaze boring into the back of her head finally got too much. She didn’t _dislike_ the strange gem, but they weren’t exactly easy to get along with either.

Bixbite shifted and stood up, walking around to face her head-on.

“I am aware, they requested I not join them on their... missions,” the word was spoken like it had personally offended them, “apparently I am not equipped for such tasks.”

She didn’t snort like she wanted to – Citrine had informed her of the redhead’s ineffectual ‘help’ the other day – but she couldn’t stop her grin. “Wow, they really are taking things seriously; don’t feel too bad about it though, a thousand yen says they manage to screw things up all by themself before noon.”

The red gem frowned in confusion.

“Ah, don’t worry, just a human thing,” she clarified.

They nodded, but still looked confused. “Is it also a human custom to deride those who you claim to be your friend?” they asked, their tone was level, like it always was, but their sharp, green eyes were even more deadly than usual.

“No, gems do it too,” she said honestly; as powerful as this gem admittedly was, she refused to be intimidated by them, besides, their apparent concern for Citrine was probably a good sign. “It’s called ‘teasing’, I’m not being serious when I say those sorts of things about my friends – well, sometimes I am, that idiot has a history of doing stupid things – but I don’t say them to be mean, just good-humoured, it’s kind of like a game, I guess.”

Bixbite seemed to be mulling the new information over – their eyes unfocused and face completely blank – but, they quickly accepted the explanation with a nod. They looked like they were ready to wander off into the woods again and, for some reason that she couldn’t quite rationalise, she didn’t really want that right now.

“Hey, do you want to spar? These drills aren’t doing me much good and it’s been ages since I’ve had a real challenge,” she called, smiling genuinely as they turned back to stare at her suspiciously.

There was a long, tense silence as the redhead tried to figure her motives, then – without a word – a ball of sand came flying at her head. She narrowly dodged the bullet and grinned as she drew her weapon and charged; it really had been too long since she’d had a good workout.

\---

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Pietersite couldn’t help but ask again, pushing another heavy branch over their head as they ducked down.

“Yes, if your intel is correct, then we can’t ignore this,” Labradorite said, not bothering to look back.

The brunet groaned and darted ahead to catch up. “That’s not what I’m talking about and you know it! Why couldn’t we tell the others what we’re doing? If my intel _is_ correct, then there’s a good chance we won’t be able to handle this ourselves.”

Labradorite sighed, but didn’t stop, or reply; they just kept pushing through the snow-covered trees, checking their map periodically. Pietersite frowned at their back.

They had been quarrelling about this for the entire trip so far and they were still very uneasy at the older gem’s stubborn refusal to inform their two students about what could possibly be a huge development, in their quest to find and rescue their lost comrades. While they could see some of Labradorite’s reasoning behind the secrecy – Citrine was always overenthusiastic when it came to finding any speck of hope for their friends’ safety and they were always heartbroken when those hopes were dashed, try as they might to hide it.

But, leaving them in the dark and potentially putting themselves in more danger, just to protect the blond’s youthful optimism? That wasn’t like the white-haired gem and the way they’d been acting lately was throwing them completely off-balance.

This had to stop, they were going into a potentially dangerous situation and with both of them so on edge around each other, it could quickly become a deadly one. They halted and waited for their friend to notice and glance questioningly back at them.

“No, there’s something that you’re concerned about and we’re not going any further until you tell me what it is. I’m not going into a battle situation with you thinking you can’t trust me, Labradorite.”

They blinked in shock, but Pietersite’s words seemed to have made it through this time.

Sighing loudly, they walked a few steps closer and ran a hand through their hair – making the iridescent colours shimmer beautifully. “You’re right, sorry. I’m not worried about Citrine and Rho, I know that they can handle it, what I’m worried about is the _other_ one.”

The brunet frowned in confusion, “Other- Wait, you mean Bixbite?”

“Yes. They are an unknown entity and they’re unpredictable, at best. We cannot be sure how they would react to hearing news of a potential crashed Homeworld construct and we certainly can’t trust them; they were a loyalist during the war and their truce with us seems to be dependent on them having no one else to turn to. If this really is Homeworld trying to scope out the Earth again, then there’s a good chance that they’ll turn on us.”

Pietersite listened to the explanation carefully, they could understand why they were so concerned – in all honesty they were inclined to agree that keeping Bixbite out of the loop was a good idea, even though they’d taken a slight warm to the quiet, in some ways childlike, gem – but they still seemed to be taking a lot of unnecessary risks.

“Ok, say you’re right and we find enough evidence for them to try and make contact, what do you propose? That we just don’t tell anyone? That we try and solve this problem ourselves without even letting those we care about in on the secret?” they asked.

The white-haired gem sighed again and looked at the snow-covered ground moodily. “I don’t know, but, right now, I think it’s best to be cautious, at least until we know what we’re dealing with.”

“Let’s go then, we can’t be far off now,” they said, laying a hand gently on the taller gem’s shoulder.

Labradorite jumped slightly at the contact, but quickly relaxed and nodded in agreement – the crinkling of their eyes hinting at the smile hidden beneath their mask – “Right.” They turned on their heel and started leading the way again, this time just a little bit closer to their comrade.

It still took them over an hour to find any signs of anything out of the ordinary; the rumours that had tipped them off were vague in their details and the gradually picking up snowstorm and dense spread of trees was making navigation nearly impossible. But after hours of hiking through the deepest parts of the pine forest, they finally stumbled across something.

Quite literally.

“Are you alright?” Labradorite asked, tone only _slightly_ amused as they stared down at the brunet, who’d fallen, headlong, into a deep trench.

They bit back the urge to snap something sarcastic at them, just nodded and picked themself back up, studying the strange ditch they’d found themself in. It was a good head or two taller than them and seemed to stretch of into the snow-obscured distance, in both directions. Definitely not natural.

The white-haired gem had jumped down to inspect it with them. “Well, this certainly isn’t a good sign,” they knelt down to study the disturbed soil, though it could hardly be called that anymore, its texture somewhere closer to rock, or glass. “Something came crashing through here, either something very hot, or something going at some speed; looks like your intel was more than just a rumour,” they said, pushing themself to their feet again.

“What do you think we should do? It goes in two directions, should we split up?”

“No. Judging from the incline the object came from that way,” they pointed one hand to the right, then swept it across to the left, “and went over there, we’ll follow it ‘til we reach the end and if we don’t find anything we’ll just have to turn back around and try the other way.”

Pietersite glanced at the taller gem uncertainly, “You think we’re going to run into trouble?”

Their white eyebrows creased, but Labradorite shook their head slowly. “Probably not, but stay on guard anyway; just in case.”

\---

It was the first time they’d been able to relax in almost a week.

Citrine was taking their time to walk home; Konoha was always a lively place at night, but today especially, it looked beautiful.

Streamers and banners and strings of colourful lights adorned every building in the town centre, paper decorations visible through the windows of shops and homes alike and there were already some stands set up along the main streets, stands which would be holding all manner of festival foods and games and goodies of every description.

They felt a warm, tingling excitement knowing that, in just a few days, the townspeople would all be gathered to have fun and meet friends – new and old – and spend a fun evening with their families.

And, for the first time in three years, they would be allowed to attend!

All of their hard work in getting the decorations and stands set up, had really paid off and they could barely contain their excitement; they weren’t sure how they’d last until the weekend when everything would really kick off.

Though, that was probably a good thing, they fully intended to ask their new friend to come with them and enjoy some new human traditions – not the food though, Bixbite had made it clear that eating wasn’t an experience they wished to repeat – maybe they’d even _unwind_ for once and stop constantly looking over their shoulder for a knife in their back.

“You are done with your, mission.”

Citrine squealed and spun around to swipe at the air behind them. An unimpressed looking redhead watched from a few feet out of their reach and raised a hairless brow at the display.

“Ahaha… Hey there, wow, you’re really good at sneaking up on people, you know that?” they managed to squeak out, cheeks burning in embarrassment.

They didn’t respond, just stood waiting for an answer to their original question.

The blond coughed into their hand and pulled their hood back on top of their head. “Yeah, I’m done with my mission now, it was a complete success!” they grinned and held out a thumbs up, Bixbite stared at it perplexedly.

Citrine chuckled and lowered their hand, “I was actually just on my way home, you wanna walk with me?”

The redhead blinked and silently started to walk forwards; the younger gem smiled gently and took the lead, arms folding behind their head habitually. It was a quiet walk – which was to be expected whenever Bixbite was involved – but they didn’t feel the need to fill that silence, like they normally would, instead they were quite content to just enjoy the air, buzzing with a quiet excitement and anticipation.

They took a deep breath, it would probably be best to ask the warrior to the festival now, they could use the visible set-ups to explain what it was and it would give them plenty of time to think about it, but they were still nervous.

It was unjustifiable; Bixbite had already told them that they wanted to try and be friends, so rejection was unlikely if they just made it clear that going to festivals together was something friends do – which was true enough – however, they couldn’t help but worry that the invitation might be taken as a request for a date.

Not that they didn’t want to go on a date with the stoic, graceful, lonely, beautiful gem – they most definitely did – but the redhead was still only _just_ figuring out friendship, trying for more than that would be taking advantage of their inexperience and, if their reaction to the romance film they’d watched a while back was any indication, they didn’t even have any interest in those types of things anyway.

Which was a shame, but not something they would ever hold against them; there were more than enough reasons to want to be friends with Bixbite and they were happy to spend any time with them, they’d just have to force their stupid mind from imagining what it would be like to walk down the street holding their hand, or snuggling up with them to watch some silly TV show, or running their fingers through that gloriously red hair, or maybe even ki-

“I want to try kissing.”

… They felt their blood run cold, _oh my stars_ , _did I_ actually _just say that out loud_?! How were they supposed to explain that utterly unprompted comment without scaring off the already skittish gem and ruining their ability to trust ever again-

“Did you hear me?” Bixbite asked, glaring back at the blond who had frozen mid-step.

Citrine just about managed to make a noise, somewhere between a negative reply and a question, “Nhuh?”

Green eyes narrowed even further at them and the redhead took a few steps forwards – almost stalking like a graceful, powerful tiger or some- No! They did _not_ need to be noticing things like that right now – until they stopped two feet away, much closer than they would usually stand to anyone.

“I would like to try kissing,” they said, enunciating each word with slow, careful precision.

Under any other circumstances they’d be complaining about the patronising tone, but right now their mind was too fried from the _content_ to even register anything else.

“Bu-wah?”

“I’m certain I have the terminology correct,” they continued, brows furrowing until they nearly met in the middle, “Pietersite did not mention any other names for the act… What they are doing,” they said after a moment’s thought, nodding somewhere to Citrine’s left. They followed the motion – if only so they wouldn’t have to keep looking at those scary, pretty, _dangerous_ eyes – and nearly choked on their spit when they saw a young human couple locking lips in a secluded alcove; hands roaming each other’s bodies eagerly and breaking apart every few seconds to grin at each other and laugh giddily, before plunging back in and trying to meld their faces together once again.

“Huhng?”

“… Are your body’s systems failing?”

\---

By the time Citrine had seemed to return to full functionality, Bixbite had already managed to drag them back to their home base.

They had intended to find the medic and have her check them over – there was no obvious damage to the bright, orange gem on their stomach, but that was no guarantee that nothing was wrong, perhaps it was this ‘corruption’ that they had apparently been saved from?

But, just as the insecure building that Citrine called home came into view, they finally regained their faculties.

“ _What_?!”

Their inability to grasp the request was really starting to grate on their nerves – weren’t they supposed to be _good_ at this interpersonal bonds nonsense?

“I cannot possibly explain it any more clearly,” they said, tone edging towards anger.

“But- that’s- _why_?” The blond was waving their arms wildly as though it would help communicate their thoughts.

Bixbite let out a sharp huff of breath, thinking for a long while on how best to articulate their reasoning. Honestly, they weren’t quite sure of it themself, but then, that was always the problem, wasn’t it? They didn’t understand anything but war and even now they were only just scratching the surface of connecting to another being; only gaining tiny slivers of understanding through the new experiences being offered to them, by the strange but… tolerable gem who had so effortlessly worked themself into their life.

They felt their brows starting to crease and mentally forced them to relax – an almost reflexive action after so long being told their emotions were a weakness, a liability to their use as a weapon – slowly, they managed to bring their thoughts into order. “I, would like to try kissing, or whatever it is that is practised in romantic relationships. To understand.”

Citrine sighed and rubbed at their neck wearily. “Look I get it, but, this is the kind of thing you need to think about, you shouldn’t just rush into-”

“I _have_ been thinking about it – for weeks now – and I’m still no closer to understanding it,” they cut in, almost growling. “I’ve thought and tried to grasp why anyone would do such things, but it’s too foreign a concept to me. I can’t decide if it’s something I desire or not, without knowing what it is first.”

Silently, they prayed for their words to sink in; they couldn’t think of any other way to put their frustration at their own inexperience.

Those bright, blue eyes wavered, uncertainly – perhaps they were starting to get through to them?

“Are… are you sure? I mean, you could ask anyone, why me?” they asked, their voice small, but there was an undercurrent to it that was starting to become very familiar to the weapon, though they hadn’t managed to find a name for the emotion; all they knew was that it was quiet, raw and warm, somehow.

“I couldn’t ask anyone else, your friends do not trust me enough for such physical intimacy and I do not trust them.”

The blond blinked, then their mouth twisted strangely; as though they were trying to hold back one of their usual wide grins that seemed to light up any room they happened to be in. “Does that mean you trust me?”

Bixbite froze. _Did_ they trust them? The thought hadn’t crossed their mind before, but now that it’d been said out loud…

“Perhaps. I don’t know, I don’t expect you to try and kill me at any rate.”

Citrine grinned and chuckled softly. “Well, I’ll take it, I guess. So, umm, kissing… we should probably go inside, if you still want to try it I mean?”

The soldier nodded shortly and followed the taller figure into their residence – the blond waved to Rhodochrosite, curled up on the sofa with her face buried in a thick textbook of some kind – and was quickly ushered into their personal quarters.

It was easy to tell who the room belonged to; every available surface was one shade of orange or another, from deep burnt orange to the same bright, uncomfortable shade that matched the clothing Citrine favoured. It was also quite messy, with strange items and trinkets scattered everywhere, only the ‘bed’ was somewhat clear of clutter – except for the tangled orange sheets draped over it.

“Ok, so, are you sure you still want to do this?” Bixbite’s glare seemed to get their opinion across quite easily. “Alright, I get it! So, uh, I’ll try kissing you then, you can tell me to stop, if you feel uncomfortable.”

With that said they slowly drew closer to the weapon, hands hovering uncertainly, before dropping sharply. The blond took a deep breath and leaned forwards – keeping their loosely curled fists at their sides – Bixbite wasn’t quite sure where to look, but ended up drawn to eyes that looked so much darker than usual. A subtle warmth radiated from the body before them, gradually growing warmer and warmer, closer and closer. Then, there was a gentle pressure against their lips, so gentle that they could barely feel it; feather light and almost… tickli-

Citrine was suddenly standing a few feet back, eyes darting around the room and hand rubbing at the back of their neck, the jarring loss of that warm body in front of them rose goose bumps on their skin.

“Well, there you go! That’s what kissing is like,” they said, they were smiling, but it didn’t crinkle their eyes like their smile normally did.

The redhead frowned deeply. “No, I couldn’t register the experience fully, it didn’t last long enough, in that film you made me watch, the kisses lasted an average of four point eight nine seconds.”

The orange gem’s face fell, but they quickly regained their composure and inched forwards again. “Ok, ok, fine, I can do this, it’s just a kiss,” they muttered, mostly to themself apparently. Slowly they returned to their position facing them; taking another deep breath, they raised a hand this time, letting it hang just beside Bixbite’s head, blue eyes looked into green, silently asking permission.

Bixbite hesitated, but gave a simple nod – the process would require physical touch, they had already accepted that – the blond’s hand gently pressed against their cheek, thumb brushing lightly over the dark stains beneath their eyes. Once again, they closed their eyes and leaned forwards, this time, their touch wasn’t the nervous, barely-there sensation that didn’t even last a second; this time, Citrine pressed their lips firmly to those of the weapon, letting them actually _experience_ what it was that had had them so confused.

Warmth was the first thing they noticed, then pressure. It was a strange sensation certainly, more giving than they had expected, though Citrine’s slightly chapped lips had a rough texture, but it wasn’t entirely unfamiliar – honestly it didn’t feel all that different from pressing their lips to any other body part, though it didn’t have the bitter, iron tang of blood that had been the only cause for them to ever taste their own skin.

After a few seconds, those soft-but-rough lips started to shift, just slightly; pursing and pressing a little closer, then parting marginally and catching Bixbite’s lower lip between them, then they were pulling away, slowly this time.

The blond opened their eyes and stared down at the shorter figure, who looked up at them in turn, trying to figure out what had caused their eyes to shift from their bight, clear, sky blue, to a darker, watery blue of a deep pool or the sky at dusk. They looked unfocussed and Bixbite might’ve expected them to start crying if they weren’t smiling so dopily.

But, they weren’t too concerned with Citrine’s ineffable feelings right now – they were hard enough to understand at the best of times – what they needed to think about were their own emotions.

And, right now, all they could feel was… nothing. Indifference. Apathy, disinterest; nothing more than what they’d already felt.

They’d hoped that trying this new experience would have given them a clear answer; either a key understanding of this foreign concept that made them suddenly desire its presence in their life – as they had when first experimenting with this ‘friendship’ thing – or outright repulsion that would put them off ever repeating the action – as with eating. From the way that everyone had described the concept of attraction and romance to them, they’d expected a strong reaction in one direction or another, but they were just as confused by the appeal as they had been before.

Perhaps that was their answer?

Citrine was still giving them that strange look, happy and bleary and warm all at once. The redhead felt that they should probably let them know what they thought.

“I still don’t think I truly understand ‘kissing’, however I am now familiar enough with the action, to know I have no desire to repeat it. Thank you, for helping me,” they said, bowing their head slightly, before stepping back – while they were not averse to physical closeness to their, friend, they still felt uncomfortable being so near to another being for so long.

The blond’s face fell, but quickly that bright grin was back on their face. “Oh, well, that’s great that you know now! I’m happy to help, so, umm… It’s been a pretty long day, I think I’m gonna get some sleep, ok?”

Bixbite nodded and turned to leave, but an uncertain sound made them stop and look back over their shoulder.

“Hey, so, there’s going to be a festival in town this weekend; it’s kinda like a big party where lots of people gather to eat and play games and have fun and stuff, would you, like to go with me? As friends, I mean,” Citrine said, eyes staring into theirs hopefully.

This ‘festival’ sounded like exactly the kind of thing they wouldn’t enjoy, but, then again, they wouldn’t know if they didn’t try – besides, they found that they didn’t want to deny their… friend.

“Very well.” They quickly darted out of the house and back into the woods, they needed to go and think about the implications of that new revelation.

\---

She wasn’t quite sure what to make of it, when her best friend slouched into the living room and fell into a heap on the couch. Rhodochrosite looked up from the plant she had been watering – a young bonsai tree, she’d only recently picked up the new hobby, but her efforts were coming along quite well, if she did say so herself – and gently prodded Citrine’s shoulder.

They groaned and tried to bury themself even further into the cushions.

“Hey, what’s wrong? You’ve been locked up in your room for over a day now, still tired from all the hard work you’ve been doing?” she asked, trying to keep her tone light and joking, despite her concern.

Citrine shook their head – or at least that’s what she thought they were doing; their hood was obscuring the movement.

“Do you want to talk about it?” she pressed, now starting to seriously worry, it wasn’t like the blond to be so quiet and down, usually when they were upset about something they’d just charge their way through the problem head-first and with that determined optimism that she so admired.

Their hood shifted again, a miserable noise coming from beneath it.

Rhodochrosite frowned, “Ok, that’s it,” she said, as she bodily lifted them – ignoring the indignant squeak of surprise – sat down on the now empty seat and not-so-gently dropped them again, their head resting on her lap and bright, blue eyes now looking up at her. “Obviously you do want to talk, else you would’ve stayed in your room moping, so what’s the problem?” Her pointed glare made it clear that she wouldn’t take any more attempts to evade the question.

The blond tried to match her stare, but quickly gave up, instead averting their eyes to the ends of their sleeves, which they were absently playing with. “I’m just… Why do I always have to get my hopes up Rho?”

She raised an eyebrow in question.

“I… me and Bixbite kissed.”

It took a few seconds for the words to sink in, but when they did all she felt was confusion. “ _What_? When did- _how_?”

Citrine determinedly avoided her gaze, picking at non-existent loose threads on their sleeves. “Last night, I was on my way home and they found me and just asked to try kissing – completely out of nowhere! I mean they saw some humans doing it and just… Anyway, they kinda talked me into it, so we tried it and they, they didn’t feel anything,” they explained, their voice choking up as they got to the end.

 “Oh, Cit-”

The blond cut her off before she could even finish their name, “I know, I know; it’s my own fault, I shouldn’t have expected anything-”

“That wasn’t what I was going to-”

She was interrupted again. “But it’s true though, isn’t it? Of course they weren’t going to feel anything, I already knew they probably weren’t interested in that sort of thing, but I kept hoping anyway; they probably only asked to do it ‘cause they noticed my _obvious_ gawking at them and didn’t know how else to let me down-”

“Are you quite done with the self-deprecation?” she asked, tone sharp to get through Citrine’s unfortunately think skull. “Because I can assure you that they absolutely did not know how you felt – I had to explain friendly teasing to them the other day! They simply don’t know enough about socialisation to pick up on your feelings and even if they did know, they’re too blunt to go about rejecting you in such an indirect manner.”

The blond opened their mouth again but she was quick to slap a hand over it and shut them up.

“Look, I know that it hurts, but there isn’t anyone to blame here, not them and _certainly_ not you; sometimes there are just unchangeable facts in life and all we can do is accept them and move on,” she gently lifted her hand and ruffled the shining blond strands partially hidden by the bright orange hood, “and eating an entire tub of ice-cream with your best friend couldn’t hurt.”

Citrine gave her a watery smile. “And watching silly romcoms?”

“Of course! Can’t have one without the other, you set up the blanket fort while I go buy the supplies and if you’re not done by the time I’m back I’ll be very disappointed,” Rhodochrosite teased, standing up in one smooth movement, toppling her friend from their comfortable position on her lap.

They grinned up at her widely, “Get something good, not that horrible green tea stuff,” they said, making a disgusted face, before jumping to their feet and charging around the room gathering their construction materials.

The pink-haired gem snorted and threw a cushion at them hard enough to knock them over.

\---

By the time they’d finished the second movie, they were half-way through their fourth tub of ice-cream – toffee, far too sickly for Rhodochrosite’s tastes, but she was pushing on admirably – she’d just clambered out of the makeshift fort to put on another film, when there was a scandalised gasp from the other side of the room.

“What have you _done_ to the living room? We leave for a few days and you turn the place upside-down!”

She slowly turned to face the two older gems standing in the doorway; one face-palming and groaning, the other quite clearly grinning beneath the mask. Rhodochrosite casually pressed the button to start the movie and flung herself back into the comfortable mess of cushions and sheets, absently shoving her friend back onto their side. “We’re mourning the loss of Citrine’s hopes and dreams, we’ve got ice-cream, wanna join?”

The young blond’s indignant complaints went ignored by everyone. Labradorite slouched over and eyed the tub warily, “It’s not green tea, is it?” they asked.

Her nose crinkled and she swatted at Citrine’s chest to shut up their cackling. “ _No_ , it’s toffee, but I still stand by my tastes,” she huffed,

The lanky figure slumped down into the pile and easily swiped the tub from their student’s hands, “Thanks, so how’ve things been around here? Other than the mourning of lost innocence, of course.”

“Boring,” Citrine quickly said, “I’ve just been working all week, but the villagers finally agreed to lift my lifetime ban from their festivals!”

Pietersite finally joined them – having apparently come to terms with the destruction of their home – and ruffled their student’s blond hair. “Well done! It just goes to show that hard work and good intentions can solve almost any disp-”

“Nah, I think it just shows that anyone can be swayed if you grovel enough,” Labradorite cut in. They effortlessly caught the spoon hurled at their head and started digging into the half-melted ice-cream they’d commandeered, “But, good job anyway I suppose, no big news or suspicious activity to report then?”

“Nope; so, what about you? How’d the mission go?” the pink-haired gem asked.

There was a tense silence at her question – only the upbeat music accompanying the opening credits of the film broke it; sensing that there was an important conversation to be had, Rhodochrosite quickly lowered the volume on the TV and eyed her tutors expectantly.

“What we tell you _will not_ leave this room, it stays strictly between us,” Labradorite said slowly, sending a hard look at Citrine.

They frowned but nodded anxiously, as did Rhodochrosite, when the same look was levelled at her.

The older gem took a moment to collect their thoughts and scan a paranoid, red eye across the room, clearly stretching all of their – already extremely heightened – senses for any signs of an intruder. “Good. Homeworld scouts have landed on Earth.”

It took a full minute for the words to sink in and when they did, she still couldn’t adequately express her thoughts.

“ _What_?”

Pietersite flung a pillow at their friend. “Do you have to say things in such a hyperbolic way? We don’t know that yet, all we know is that a Homeworld vessel crashed in Finland about a week ago, we don’t even know if anyone was in it,” they clarified, though the younger gems were still left with questions.

“What, exactly, did you find?” Rhodochrosite asked, her mind already whirling through all the potential implications.

“We found a ship,” the white-haired gem said, “far more advanced than the ones used before and during the rebellion; no one was on-board and it looked abandoned. No signs of activity in the surrounding area either, but the crash site was least a few days old by the time we got there, so whoever was on it had plenty of time to get away, if they found a warp pad they could be anywhere right now.”

Rhodochrosite frowned. “And, do we know anything about who they might be?”

The brunet quickly took over the explanations, “No, the ship was tiny, so there can’t have been more than one or two people on-board – almost certainly an escape shuttle – but its systems were badly damaged, so we couldn’t recover any data about who was on it, or why.”

“An escape pod? So they might’ve just been in an accident and didn’t mean to come here to cause trouble?” Citrine asked hopefully.

“Even if that’s true, a Homeworld Gem being here can only be a bad thing, if they find out that there’re still Crystal Gems alive, they will report it to their superiors. We’re too weak to fight another war,” Labradorite said, tone dark and serious, the tone they used to use when giving orders in battle.

A tense silence smothered the living room like a thick mist. She knew that it was only a matter of time, they all did really, the Gem Empire wasn’t going to give up, they were tenacious, they were greedy, they believed that the entire galaxy was theirs to rule and consume and, more than anything else, they were logical; they knew how to play the long game and at some point they were going to come back and finish what they had started and when they did, there was going to be little that they could do to stop them.

But, it had been so long since they’d truly had to face that threat – Bixbite had given them a scare, but they were only one Gem and the rebels had destroyed anything they could’ve used to contact, or even reach, Homeworld millennia ago – if this new danger had truly come to Earth with the intentions of destroying what little was left of the Crystal Gems… Rhodochrosite felt a fear that she hadn’t felt in a _long_ time.

“We’re going to have to be careful from now on and I don’t want you telling any of this to anyone, especially not Bixbite, we _cannot_ trust them with this,” Labradorite quickly shot Citrine a silencing look when they made to object, “but don’t worry, I know we’ll find them and we’ll work out some way to defeat them; so, until we find out more… perhaps just keep an eye out for any suspicious activity,” they finished, a comforting smile crinkling their eyes.

Rhodochrosite’s lips turned up, into a brief, grim smile. Her hand found its way into Citrine’s and she gave it a gentle squeeze, they’d not spoken in so long that she was starting to worry – their expression was uncertain and seemed to waver between anger, fear and anticipation – but a hard grip in response and a hard nod quelled her worries. If only a little.

She was just reaching for the remote to unmute the TV, but her hand only just brushed the smooth plastic, before an awful screech halted her in her tracks.

Everyone glanced uncertainly at each other, until a great, distant crash made the floor shudder and more indistinct screams and shouts filtered in through the walls.

“Something suspicious like that?” Citrine quipped nervously.

Rhodochrosite only resisted smacking them for it because she was already darting out of the house – through a convenient hole left by Labradorite – with her other teacher and friend close on her heels.

They followed the sounds of battle, deep into the forest; occasionally another crash would rattle the trees and the screams were quickly growing closer, though any words that might’ve been there were distorted by rage, desperation, fear.

A gale suddenly came out of nowhere, bending thick branches so far back that they snapped off, sending leaves and soil into a whirling twister that obscured everything around the pink-haired Gem. She was forced to stop and brace herself against the wind, only barely feeling Citrine bumping into her back and taking shelter behind her form. The second the storm died down to a rough – but traversable – wind, she leapt off again, her friend quick to follow, she had just managed to catch sight of Labradorite again, when another gale screeched through the forest, howling like a wounded animal.

She grit her teeth and tried to trudge through the tempest, holding tight to Citrine’s hand, who in turn was pulling Pietersite along behind them.

“Hey! Wait up!” she screamed at her teacher’s back – determinedly pressing forward, even despite the wind trying to push them away – but her words were ripped away so fast she couldn’t even hear them herself.

Rhodochrosite was preparing a second call, when the storm suddenly died and was replaced by a howl of pain.

Taking the opportunity, she rushed forwards, easily pulling her comrades along with her and catching up with Labradorite. Together, they burst into an unexpected clearing – unexpected, because there hadn’t been one here a few days ago.

The first thing she saw, was the towering wall of sand; taller than any of the trees and stretching completely across the wide clearing, at the very top she could see streams of sand being ripped away, twisting in micro tornadoes before dissipating and scattering sand down on them like rain. Her eyes were drawn down to the small, familiar, red-headed figure standing before it, arms stretched out wide. Citrine was just preparing to call out to them, when they suddenly dropped their arms, landing in a low crouch with a terrifying growl, the sand wall before them started to shift and crumble, suddenly dropping like a wave that swept across the clearing, pulling out trees and great boulders with it.

She couldn’t help but thank every star in the sky, that they weren’t on the receiving end of that attack.

But, whoever was, apparently wasn’t fazed by it, once the tsunami had stilled – coating the forest floor in a thick layer of sand – a sudden geyser shot the golden sand up, far into the sky, followed by a person, who drifted in the air for a single moment, before crashing back down.

“Please stop, I don’t want to fight you!” the stranger screamed, though she was still holding her gigantic fan in a defensive position.

“ _Die_.” Another inhuman growl escaped Bixbite, as they drew their arms up once again and pulled their sand into a chaotic whirlwind around her.

Pietersite gulped audibly, laughing rather hysterically. “Well, I guess we don’t have to worry about Bixbite betraying us to Homeworld?”

\---


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

>  ~~remember those early days when I used to post a new chapter once every 2-3 weeks?...... man what happened to those days~~ Sorry about the super long wait for this chap, I've had the mother of all blocks for about 3 weeks, hopefully this was worth the wait! (A special thank you to Spell for keeping me from imploding and giving me some fun distractions from staring at the walls, you're such a blessing deary ilu!)  
>  Enjoy folks!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

Everything was wind and sand and chaos.

They swept a wave of sand against their opponent with a graceful arm gesture, she heaved her great fan with a cry and sent it back at them. They braced themself against the gale that tore at their hair and whipped their clothes behind them – though the millions upon billions of grains parted around them, like water around a stone – neither one moved closer to the other, they let their mastery of the elements do their dancing for them, in an elaborately choreographed battle.

It was beautiful.

No. No, that wasn’t them anymore, they weren’t like that, they had, friends, now, they were learning how to be something else, why did she have to come back, when they were just becoming something other than what they had forced upon them, why did she have to return when they’d finally found people who wanted their company, who didn’t flinch every time hard, green eyes glanced in their direction.

Bixbite glanced away to scan the edges of the forest, _where were they?_

“Please, just hear me out,” Smithsonite called as she swatted away another blast of sand, “just give me a minute to explain-”

“Explain what? Whatever purpose brought you back, I don’t care; you should’ve stayed gone, you think I’ve forgotten you abandoning me?”

Her expression was caught somewhere between rage and confusion. “We never _abandoned_ you, we tried to take you with us when we were called to retreat-” she grunted as she sent another blast of wind towards an incoming missile “- _you_ were the one who ignored your orders, you were the one so desperate to keep fighting a losing war, that you went running back to an empty battlefield!”

Their teeth grit painfully, as they swept their hands up and brought a wave of sand with them; she easily blocked it. “Admiral Pyrite sent you, for what purpose?”

“If you’d stop attacking me for one minute, then maybe I could explain!”

Bixbite didn’t want her to explain. They didn’t want her to be here, they just wanted her gone, so they wouldn’t have to think, to remember. “Why did you return, why now when I’ve just started- What more do they want from me? I’ve already failed at every task I was made for, they never wanted me, what more use could they possibly have for my existence? What more will they _take_ -”

 _No_. No, they were getting too emotional, they couldn’t afford to be so unfocused, that would cost them their life. They knew the tactics at play here, Smithsonite would use her devastating, wide-ranging wind attacks to keep her opponent engaged and at a distance, but she wasn’t a threat – not to _them_ – the real danger lay in the shadows, watching and waiting and winding their cowardly traps, looking for the perfect moment to spring them, leaving them at the mercy of the more aggressive Gem.

They knew they were out there; Smithsonite and Ametrine were a deadly two-person team – never a three-person team, no, they were too wild and untrustworthy and _impossible to work with_ – one was never far from the other, Ametrine would be lurking in the trees out of sight, they needed to find them, then they could focus on _destroyi_ -

“Ah! What the heck?”

Bixbite glanced over their shoulder to see Citrine and their friends tangled in shimmering blue wires, kicking their legs at the air and straining to free their restrained hands.

“Yo, Smith, we’ve got company! You wanna hurry it up already?” The familiar voice came from between the trees at the edge of the clearing.

They could feel their own growl reverberating throughout their entire body, with a flick of their wrist they sent a dozen tiny darts of sand to slice through the wires, while their other hand snapped a golden whip to the place the voice had come from, as expected Ametrine leapt away and rushed to their ally, attempting to grab her arm and drag her away, but she resisted, snapping something at them too quiet to hear from this distance.

Four figures came to stand beside them, though they didn’t turn their head to look. “Thanks, are you alright?” Citrine asked, their normally high voice low with worry. They didn’t bother to answer; they had to shatter these two pests while they were both in one place and distracted arguing with each other.

A sandstorm grew up around pair, but they didn’t stay trapped for long before a blast of wind broke it apart, Bixbite growled and formed the sand hanging in the air into a mass of razor-sharp spears, which they rained down upon their enemies, most were deflected by a fan stronger than any metal and the others were plucked out of the air by thin, glittering wires and thrown off to the side. They sent the sand at their feet crawling up their legs to drag them under, but they both easily kicked free and leapt to safer ground, Ametrine flicking their wrist, sending their strings around a nearby tree – dislodged by an earlier wave of sand – and launching it towards them.

They were already forming a wall to protect themself, but the tree was stopped in its tracks by Rhodochrosite wrapping her powerful arms around it; with a grunt, she spun once and hurled it back towards the attackers.

Citrine leapt to her side, both of them holding out their arms as though they were trying to… protect them?

“Hey, I dunno what your problem with them is, but we’re not gonna let you hurt them!”

The shock they felt was mirrored on their former team members faces, but Smithsonite’s calculating gaze quickly returned and she stared directly at Bixbite in shock. “You… Crystal Gems, _you_ joined the Crystal Gems?” she asked.

All the sand they’d been preparing for another attack dropped with a muted hiss.

“No, I…” they looked to Citrine – still facing the enemies protectively – to Rhodochrosite – giving them a gentle smile over her shoulder – to Pietersite – nodding encouragingly, “but, I’m not…”

“They’re our friend. If you’ve got a problem with that, you can take it up with me,” Citrine said, they couldn’t see their face, but they could see how they held their chest and shoulders high and strong, could almost feel the burning blue eyes that would undoubtedly be staring Smithsonite and Ametrine down. Their insides twisted distressingly, their hands were shaking and all their attempts to still them failed miserably; _what is happening?_

Ametrine scoffed, but a sharp glare from their ally immediately shut them up. “We don’t have any problem with Bixbite, or with you, we’re not here to fight, we’re here to talk.”

“Hmm, two Homeworld soldiers returning to Earth, just to ‘talk,’ now why do I not believe that?” Labradorite asked, stepping forwards to stand in line with their students. “You’re outnumbered, I think you’ve realised by now that you won’t win this fight, it’d be in your best interests to just tell the truth.”

The purple Gem’s laugh was familiar, but by no means comforting, “We _are_ telling the truth, what, you really think Homeworld still cares about this hunk of rock? We came to find our teammate and get off-planet before everything goes to hell, don’t think your gang of weaklings is gonna stop-”

Teammate? Had they honestly just tried to claim that they thought of Bixbite as their ‘teammate’? Who did those fools think they were kidding, they’d never been part of a team, they’d just been a tool, a weapon, an object to throw at the enemy when all else failed and now they claimed that they _wanted_ them? What was Admi- No, they weren’t their commander anymore, they wouldn’t give them that honour, what was _Pyrite_ planning? What did they want to use them for now? Why could they not just-

“Woah, Bixbite slow down, we can’t understand what you’re-”

-and Ametrine and Smithsonite playing the part of worried _teammates_ , pretending to care now, when they’d been nothing more than a pest, something to fear before, they’d only come because they were ordered, because Pyrite wanted their weapon back, did their creator truly hate them so much that they would only be allowed to exist as their tool, even when they were considered worthless, would they still not be thrown away and forgotten, did Pyrite really want them to only live to serve them or die-

“Bixbite! You need to calm down, Bixbite, _stop_!”

-just a pawn in their _meaningless_ power plays, a tool, a weapon, a _monster_ -

All their breath was knocked out of them by a hard shoulder connecting to their stomach, they didn’t get a chance to perceive any more than a flash of orange, before the world was rushing past them so fast the trees blurred into a mass of green and wind tore at their ears and brought tears to their eyes. Their mind was still spinning out of control and their body left simultaneously as heavy as lead and as intangible as mist and everything was going so _fast_.

Until it wasn’t. Gradually, the wind slowed, the trees separated and became more distinct, they looked down at the orange-covered back carrying them, every step jolted their stomach uncomfortably, but instead of struggling, they gripped the fabric under their hands tighter, breath shuddering as they tried to collect themself.

Citrine came to a halt, but they didn’t make any effort to disturb their load. “Sorry, you were losing control back there, I just thought it’d be best to get you somewhere safe, away from them.”

“The others-”

“Are fine; don’t worry, they can handle themselves.”

They felt the soft orange cloth beginning to tear, they were clinging to it so tightly, but they couldn’t let go, didn’t want to. Bixbite’s teeth gritted painfully, even as they said, “We need to go back, those two- I need to destroy them.”

“Why?”

“They’re dangerous, they want you rebels dead, they cannot be trusted,” They said, trying to regain control of their breathing and anger; their hands had long since turned white.

Citrine gently shifted them from their shoulder and stepped back, just enough to look them in the face, but stay close enough to keep their hands resting loosely on their arms to keep them steady, as they couldn’t seem to stand without their whole body shaking terribly. “No, why do _you_ want to destroy them?”

“I…” they gaped for a few moments, trying to come up with an answer, some words that could express everything they were feeling – a difficult task when they didn’t really _know_ what they were feeling – they grasped a handful of their own hair and pulled like it would somehow pull the thoughts from their head.

“Hey, don’t worry, relax,” Citrine said, gently wrapping their hand around theirs and loosening their grip just slightly, “it’s difficult, I get that, you don’t have to force yourself to tell me, but it looks like they’re gonna be around until we figure out what they’re here for and what to do with them, so we all need to be on the same page. They said something about finding you and leaving Earth, do you have any idea what they might want?”

They took a deep, calming breath and quickly smothered the impulse to run back to the battlefield. “They must have been sent by Pyrite, to reclaim the Admiral’s weapon,” they said, practically spitting that last word.

It was almost funny how much their reaction to it had changed in such a short time, for as long as they could remember, that word had been banal, meaningless; it was just a descriptor, a plain, undeniable fact, it was simply what they were, they had even taken a certain pride in it, knowing that they were a useful tool had been the one source of comfort in their old life. But now, having to refer to themselves as a weapon made something in their chest drop, made them simultaneously want to rip out their hair and rip apart everything around them.

“And… do you want to go back with them?” Citrine was giving them that strange, almost sad, look again.

The stupidity of the question was apparently enough to break them out of their unfocussed thoughts, they were probably giving their own strange look right about now. “…No. No I don’t.”

They let out a sigh of relief and ran a hand through their blond locks, “That’s great! Well, not great because of, I mean,” they trailed off looking at Bixbite’s confused face and coughed quietly, “well, I’m just glad that you’re staying. Don’t worry though, I’m sure we’ll figure this all out, we’re not gonna let anyone take you away.”

Bixbite looked at the face of their first friend – smiling softly, with their bioluminescent freckles creating the reflections of stars in their sky-blue eyes – and for the first time in their existence, felt the desire to smile back.

\---

“So, are you going to make this easy, or difficult?”

The stranger glared back at them over her shoulder, green eyes staring hard at the hand clamped around her wrist. “If you don’t want me to _make_ this difficult, you’ll release me immediately,” she snapped, trying to jerk her arm back, but Labradorite kept their grip firm.

They chuckled and checked to see if the other target was still being held, ah yes, Rhodochrosite had them pinned effortlessly and was now looking to them for instructions.

“I don’t think you’re in any position to be making threats, so start talking,” they said, turning back to their own captive – she appeared to be the leader in this operation.

“Not until you tell me what you’re doing to Bixbite, if they’re hurt in any way-”

Labradorite tightened their grip and quickly cut her off, “Citrine is helping them calm down, since it appears to be _your_ presence that drove them into such a state in the first place, I think _we_ should be the ones most concerned with their safety, hm?”

She growled and tried to pull her hand back one last time, staring off into the trees where the two young Gems had disappeared just a few moments ago.

“Fine. Ask your questions so we can go find them already.”

“How about you put that weapon away and we go back to our base first, we can all get nice and comfortable while we talk,” they didn’t bother waiting for a response, already pulling her away from where Citrine had taken Bixbite and leading her back to their home.

“ _Seriously_? We’re just going along with this?” Rhodochrosite’s hostage was apparently considerably less sensible than theirs; already fighting against her strong grip.

The fan-wielding Gem stopped and shot her partner a look, “Yes, we are, stand down Ametrine.”

They glowered for a second more but eventually quietened down, allowing their captor to firmly push them forwards, with their hands held behind their back. Labradorite copied the movement, before glancing back at their other comrade.

“Are you coming?”

Pietersite shook their head. “No, I’m sure that the locals have noticed all this commotion by now, I’ll go talk to the authorities and make sure they don’t do anything rash, please… just be careful,” they said.

They nodded in acknowledgement and kept walking to their home, eyes fixed on their two prisoners, while they had seemed honest enough in their surrender, it didn’t hurt to be cautious.

An unbearably tense silence settled over the group, with everyone sending wary and distrustful stares at each other and every slight twitch from the two strangers sending Labradorite’s senses into overdrive. By the time they got back home they were practically vibrating with pure tension, it only stopped once they had run and grabbed the old Homeworld restraints that they had salvaged who-knew-how-many centuries ago and clapped them onto the strangers’ limbs.

The purple one gave the shackles a bemused look and snorted loudly, “Really? These obsolete relics are the best you’ve got?”

Their teammate elbowed them sharply, shutting them up with a hard look, before turning back to their captors. “Look, we’ve been cooperative, would you mind just getting this interrogation over with, so we can get going?”

“You really think that we’re just going to let you go?” Rhodochrosite scoffed, crossing her arms defensively.

“Yes, when you find out that we don’t care about you or this planet enough to want to waste our time starting trouble.”

Labradorite waved a hand to halt her inevitable retort before it could start and took a step forwards, “We’ll be the judge of that. So, let’s start with who you are and what you’re doing here, shall we?”

She, almost imperceptibly, straightened in her seat and her eyes glazed over slightly. “Captain Smithsonite and Commander Ametrine of the YDS Desert Rose, under Admiral Pyrite, Punishment Division, Facet 1F3H Fleet,” her sharp, instinctive words brought back all-too-vivid memories of other young soldiers they had once known, so deeply indoctrinated by the Diamonds to the point that they lost all independence – Yellow Diamond in particular seemed to elicit such blind compliance – her eyes suddenly regained focus and she shook her head slightly. “Former, Captain Smithsonite, _former_ ,” she whispered, she seemed to be trying to convince herself more than them.

“Well, well, that sounds like quite the story, care to elaborate?” they asked, when it became obvious that she was still deep in her own thoughts.

“We’re deserters, we were part of Homeworld’s military and now we’re not, there’s not much story to explain,” Ametrine cut in, glaring at them as they gently nudged Smithsonite back to the present, “and even if there was, I don’t see why we should tell it to you.”

They raised an eyebrow and glanced between the two for a moment. “I beg to differ, considering what happened the _last_ time someone defected from Homeworld,” they said.

A silent conversation was held between the two, before finally they seemed to reach some unspoken agreement, the former Captain straightened once again, but this time it wasn’t because of any reflexes trained into her. “We’re not rebels if that’s what you’re thinking, we have no intentions of starting some hopeless war, we just want to retrieve our lost teammate and then disappear into the galaxy and stay under their radar; so, to get to the _real_ point of whatever questions you want to ask; no, we’re not going to be reporting that there are surviving Crystal Gems on Earth to anyone back home.”

“A fine tale… if it’s true.”

“And I’m sure nothing we say is going to convince you otherwise, so why are we wasting our time with this whole charade?” she said back, her face was mostly bored, but her voice was starting to edge towards anger, Labradorite idly shifted their feet into a ready position.

They had to admit, she had a point, it certainly wasn’t _impossible_ that they were telling the truth, but their obvious reluctance to tell the whole story was making them look entirely too suspicious.

What options did they even have? Keep them locked up or bubbled for the rest of eternity? Remove the risk entirely and just shatter them, no doubt greatly hurting their own comrades in the process, noble idealists that they were? Or take their words as truth and let them free, which they simply could not see ending in anything but destruction?

They sensed Rhodochrosite stepping up next to them, though they didn’t tear their eyes away from the two strangers for a second.

“You say you wanted to find Bixbite and take them with you, but they certainly didn’t seem happy to see you, clearly there’s something more to this,” she said, Labradorite wasn’t looking, but they could practically hear the gears turning in her head.

The reactions weren’t what they had been expecting at all; Smithsonite froze for a long moment, before her she dropped her head – though not fast enough for them to have missed the surprising pain in her expression – Ametrine took almost the complete opposite response, they immediately rose from their seat and growled down at them, using their height to their advantage in intimidating them.

“That’s none of your damn business, why do you even care about our relationship with them, huh? We’re teammates, if they’d just let us explain-”

“Ametrine, calm down, it’s a fair question,” Smithsonite gently pulled them back down next to her, her face once again back under its calm, bored mask, “and the answer to it is… complicated, I’m not going to say that they have no reason to be angry at us, but, the problems between us were never our choice, we had just hoped that… maybe we could fix things, now that we’re not with Ad- with _them_ anymore.”

Labradorite raised an eyebrow and started to sift through their mental catalogue of the elites of Homeworld, trying to uncover anything they might remember about this ‘Pyrite’ they seemed so uncomfortable talking about.

They didn’t get very far before Ametrine started talking again, or rather, ranting. “The bastard, we finally get away from them and we still have to deal with _their_ mistakes, I can’t even blame Bix for hating us so much ‘cause of the _scumbag_ , damn it! If it wasn’t for that creeper Fuchsite suddenly taking an interest, I’d say just leave them alone and let them live in peace for a change-”

Time seemed to stop for a terrible moment, before Rhodochrosite was literally jumping onto their lap, grabbing fistfuls of their top and shaking them hard enough that it would probably give a human whiplash.

“Fuchsite?! You know about Fuchsite?” she asked, not even halting her shaking until Labradorite had literally dragged her off the confused victim of her assault.

Ametrine looked like they were going to throw up any second, but luckily their teammate was able to take over for them. “Um, yes? Scientist, some kind of fusion, I guess? Really… weird, has a strange fascination with powerful Gems-”

They knew that the shock on their face would be mostly hidden by their mask, but their student’s was an open book, she shook in Labradorite’s grip and seemed to be struggling for words, “It’s them, it’s really them… Was there, did you ever see an Obsidian with them?”

She gave them an utterly confused look. “The loner who’s always frowning? We worked with them a little but I don’t get-”

Rhodochrosite burst into tears and slumped right to the ground, they had to admit, their own legs were feeling rather unsteady right now too. After all these years of nothing but vain hopes and unspoken fears…

“What’s the big deal? They’re just an arrogant little prat, how do _you_ even know them?” Ametrine asked, finally coming out of their stupor.

They almost wanted to laugh. “Yep, that’s definitely our Obsidian.”

\---


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Heya! Sorry it’s been such a wait, struggled a bit since this chap was originally gonna cover a lot more ground, buuut the second scene ended up being way longer than anticipated, so to keep you lovely folks from waiting another ten years for a _monster_ of a chap, I’ve basically just cut it in half, it shouldn’t mess with the pace too much though and it means I can expand the next chap some more to make it flow much more naturally. (Also, i've gone back and made some minor edits to all the previous chaps, just typo fixes mostly and i just got annoyed with myself for constantly capitalising 'Gem' so it's now only capitalised when specifically referring to the Crystal Gems)  
>  I hope you enjoy, as always!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

“What do you mean ‘everything’s just fine’? Can you even _see_ the giant dust cloud hovering over the forest?”

Pietersite groaned. “Yes, of course I can, but it’s really nothing to worry about, just… a minor scuffle, everything’s calmed down now so there’s no need to do anything like calling your authorities, or rounding up a mob to go and investigate-”

“You call earth-shaking explosions and gale-force winds a _minor scuffle_?”

They opened their mouth to retort, but had the sinking suspicion they’d just talked themself into an even deeper pit.

They really hoped the others were having an easier time than they were right now.

\---

Citrine sighed, looking at the empty space that had only a few moments ago been filled.

Their talk with Bixbite seemed to have calmed them down somewhat, but they were still acting off; panicky and distant, like they were still expecting an attack to come at any moment. Not that their fears weren’t unfounded, but it was distressing to see them in this state when they’d only _just_ started to warm up to their new friends.

At least it wasn’t because of anything any of them had done this time.

They’d decided that they should probably go back home to see how the others were doing, hopefully find something to help ease Bixbite’s fears. It was too much to hope that they might’ve wanted to come with them and face their past together, but still, when they had turned back one last time, Bixbite had already slunk off into the forest – and knowing their usual reaction to unexpected emotional upheavals, they wouldn’t be showing themself until they’d had a good long time to be alone and Think.

But they couldn’t worry about that right now; Bixbite was calm enough, so the next biggest concern was finding out exactly what these strangers wanted and what to do with them. Normally, they’d leave that sort of thing up to the others to decide, but this whole mess directly affected their new friend and, as much as they loved them, Labradorite could be a little… harsh, when it came to protecting their small family.

Those thoughts just made their walk towards their home shift into a full-on sprint, trees blurring as they sped across the forest floor.

The lack of smoke and destruction when they finally got home was a promising sign, but they still barely slowed their pace long enough to slide open the door and charge into the living room, drawing the eyes of the group sitting calmly at the dining table and giving them stares of varying degrees of bewilder.

Labradorite seemed to be the most unfazed, they even gave them a short wave. “Yo.”

They didn’t get a chance to respond before Rhodochrosite was leaping out of her seat and latching onto them like they’d been gone for a millennia or two.

“Citrine, Obsidian’s still alive! They’re ok, we can still save them!”

It felt like the floor had dropped out from under them, “W-what? How…”

She looked like she didn’t know whether to scream, sob or grin, so she settled for some combination of the three, ending up making a strange hiccupping noise. “Those two knew them! They saw them, just a few weeks ago, Obsidian is _alive_ -”

Their entire focus had suddenly narrowed down to just the two gems in sitting front of them, Citrine felt that their entire being was being crushed under the weight of that revelation; it took all their strength to slowly drag themself to the table and rest their shaking hands against it for support. “They… are you for real?” they asked, their voice had stated out little more than a hoarse croak, but a grin was quickly taking over their face and they felt the sudden urge to cheer and praise whatever star had been protecting their old friend, “They’re really safe?”

“‘Safe’ is a strong word,” the gem with the ponytails interrupted, “I think ‘wilfully ignoring looming danger’ is a better fit.”

The other one snickered, “How about, ‘happily exercising self-destruction’?”

Suddenly, they didn’t want to praise anything. “What do you mean?”

Rhodochrosite let out a frustrated sigh as she stepped up next to them, glaring down at the two still in their seats. “They’re refusing to tell us, all we’ve gotten out of them are their names – Ametrine and Smithsonite – a claim that they’ve defected from Homeworld and some vague intel on Fuchsite and Obsidian; enough that we’re sure they know our Sid, but not enough to actually act on,” she said, practically growling.

The newcomer with the green eyes scoffed and leaned back in her seat, almost casually, “Can you blame us? We’re being held prisoner by hostile rebels, our knowledge is the only thing assuring our safety right now and honestly? I care far more about my life than your idiot friend’s.”

Everyone was glaring at each other distrustfully, eyes flittering between potential attackers and the various exits, they probably had ten different game plans each, judging by the way their bodies kept twitching in nervous tension.

Citrine coughed awkwardly, finally regaining the attention of the two strangers, it was uncomfortable to say the least, but at least no one had drawn a weapon on them. “So, what do you want? What’ll make you tell us everything you know about Obsidian?” they asked, staring into the hard eyes of Smithsonite – everything about her demeanour so far indicated that she was the leader of the pair.

Her gaze was cold and calculating, as though she was trying to parse their intentions just from their posture and expression; they did their best to keep both calm, but firm.

Eventually, she seemed to reach a decision. “Give us Bixb-”

“No.”

Now _everyone_ was staring at them, shocked and confused – Labradorite even looked a touch angry, from what little of their face could be seen.

Smithsonite’s brows furrowed as she slowly pushed herself up.

“No?” she hissed, but they stood their ground, even as she leaned across the table and glared at them with a malice that distinctly reminded them of Bixbite when they’d had their first confrontation.

They met her glare unrelentingly. “They’re terrified of you, or at least the life you remind them of; I’d never let you take them away unwillingly, besides, they aren’t mine to _give_ -” they felt dirty just saying it “-they’re their own gem and they can choose how to live their own life.” She looked taken aback, but they didn’t want to wait for her to start arguing, so they powered on, “I’m not saying that I think you’re gonna hurt them or anything, I want to believe that you’re not bad people, but we won’t sell out our friend just for a bit of intel.”

A snort broke Citrine out of their staring match, they glanced at Ametrine, who looked far too relaxed for the tense situation. “Wow, you don’t care much about your friend, huh? Not that I blame you-”

The room practically shuddered from the force of Rhodochrosite’s fist colliding with a structural post, they hoped she’d held back enough that the house wasn’t about to collapse on them.

They turned back to look at her, a comforting smile already on their lips as they wordlessly communicated their sympathy, before turning back to the newcomers with the very same fire burning in their eyes that they’d just seen in their best friends. “Of course we care about them. But we’re not going to change our morals just for a chance at bringing them back; we are going to save them, with or without your help.”

A long silence settled gently over the room. The two hostages couldn’t have looked more floored if they tried, Smithsonite had collapsed back into her seat and was just staring blankly at them, the other one seemed torn between amusement and annoyance.

Citrine had to wonder what kind of life they’d been living that they’d be so shocked just to see someone so determined to save a friend, weren’t they trying to save Bixbite themselves?

If that was true, then maybe they were being too hard on the pair; no one left Homeworld without some residual beliefs they needed to overcome and they honestly believed that these two cared – at least a little – about their former teammate, it was clearly visible in their faces whenever their name was mentioned, in how desperate they had seemed when fighting against them, even now, the white-haired gem was giving them a look that almost bordered on respect, though her eye remained narrow and suspicious.

They glanced down to the table, seeing the shackles around her wrists, they frowned.

Neither side was going to just start trusting each other, not when everyone was being so openly antagonistic. Someone had to make the first step.

She flinched when they stepped around the table to grab at her hands, her mouth barely opened to snap at them before they’d managed to find the panel needed to unlock the restraints. After a minute of waiting for something to happen they awkwardly chuckled and turned to Labradorite. “Uh, how do you unlock these things?”

Rhodochrosite slapped a hand to her forehead, but she didn’t do much to hide the smile pulling at her lips.

Their teacher was less accepting, giving them the hard, glassy stare that always made them feel like their mind was being read. “… Do you know what you’re doing?” they asked, voice serious and expression carefully blank.

“Not really, but I believe that they really just want to help Bix, if I’m wrong then it’s on me.”

A long silence stretched between them, Rhodochrosite’s eyes flicking between the two like a spectator at a tennis match and twin perplexed stares boring into the side of their head, though they didn’t want to look away from Labradorite until they were absolutely sure that their resolve had been expressed.

Finally, mismatched eyes shut in defeat and they shook their head. “Alright, alright, you win,” they said, holding up their hands as they wandered over, reaching over and beginning to fiddle with Smithsonite’s bonds, until they snapped open.

“You’re… letting us go then?”

“We’re not going to hold you prisoner, though we won’t be letting you just wander anywhere you want – consider this a probation.” They were just leaning over to free Ametrine when the purple gem muttered a soft ‘finally’ under their breath and their shackles sparked for a brief second, then fell apart.

Everyone was staring at them in shock as they casually stretched their arms over their head, they answered the unspoken questions with a smirk that stretched across their entire face, “What, you thought we couldn’t free ourselves anytime we wanted? That tech is _archaic_ , damn you’re lucky we aren’t actually with Homeworld, you wouldn’t last two minutes against our modern weaponry.” They slumped heavily back into their seat and gave everyone standing around the table an expectant look, “So, we talking terms, or what?”

Smithsonite sighed and pulled their cat-eared hood down over their eyes, settling down far more gracefully than her ally; she tapped a finger anxiously against her cheek while everyone else sat in their seats.

The second everyone was somewhat relaxed, she immediately launched into her breakdown, “Here’s where we stand; you’re harbouring our teammate, who we have to convince to join us in leaving this planet and escaping outside of gem-controlled space and _we_ have intel that would be very useful to you. None of us trust each other and nothing we say or do will be able to convince you we won’t run back to the diamonds to let them know they missed a couple of Crystal Gems, so if anyone’s got any ideas on how to proceed without resorting to violence, I’d like to hear them.”

“About that plan of yours,” Labradorite said, “I don’t you’ll be escaping gem space anytime soon… given the state of that pod you two arrived in, I don’t think you even leaving Earth is feasible.”

Ametrine scoffed, “Please, I could have that thing in orbit in an hour,” they said, giving a confident smirk.

The white-haired gem’s expression was carefully blank. “Oh? Even after we blew it up?”

“You _what_?”

They rose an eyebrow and stared pointedly at the hands that had just been slammed down on the table, “What did you expect? We weren’t going to take any chances with potential Homeworld scouts, so unless you’ve got another ship hidden somewhere on your person then you’re not going anywhere.”

“There must still be ships _somewhere_ , we never had the chance to recover everything after the retreat, it old tech but if I can just rework some systems…” Ametrine seemed to be talking mostly to themself, fingers tracing lines against the table top as if drawing out invisible blueprints

“We’ve found one or two, but they’re all thousands of years old, battle-damaged and left unmaintained for millennia; hardly in working order.”

The outsiders went very quiet, eyeing each other in a way that suggested a silent conversation was happening; plans being hastily built and rehashed.

It was Rhodochrosite who next broke the silence, “Why are you so desperate to leave anyway? Obviously being fugitives you want to steer clear of any gem colonies and stations, but you’re safe enough from them here, no one other than you has even looked at this system since the war ended.”

Both of their stares changed at that, shifting from anxious fretting to pure dread.

Labradorite was jumped on that weakness in seconds, “No, someone has been looking here haven’t they? What do you know?” they demanded, chair screeching horribly against the floor as the jerked to their feet.

Neither one spoke, still sending each other worried glances and bodies fidgeting with nervous tension, Ametrine’s whole body was shaking slightly and Smithsonite’s fingers were drumming against the smooth wood of the table so hard that she was wearing an impression in it. She quickly clamped down on it, nails digging grooves as she carefully dragged her hand back to herself and crossed her arms tightly.

Her eyes stared down at her wrists for a second, before flickering up to Citrine and staying there, even as she let out a controlled breath and opened her mouth to speak.

“Alright. If you want to know about Obsidian and Fuchsite and everything… then fine, whatever – we don’t exactly care what happens to them, either way – but, you don’t get _anything_ from us until our safety is guaranteed.” Her voice was hard, confident, cool; but she was still giving the blond a look that bordered on pleading.

They immediately wanted to promise them anything and everything they asked for, but reluctantly shut their mouth long enough to send a pleading look towards their comrades.

Rhodochrosite was clearly hesitant, but still gave a single, stiff nod.

The older gem was surprisingly quick to shrug, body appearing relaxed, but their eyes were keen and focused entirely on the two sitting opposite them.

It was all the authorisation they needed.

“Ok, we promise we won’t hurt you. Unless you’re actually trying to shatter us or something.”

They kept up the staring match a few moments longer, as though making sure they wouldn’t take back their words, but eventually she nodded, leaning forwards in her seat and placing her interlocked fingers in front of her.

“Good, so, I suppose you want to know what the immediate threat is first?” She didn’t bother waiting for an answer, already launching off with a tone that meant business, “To put your mind a little at ease; it’s not the Diamonds, they’re busy with maintaining and expanding their existing colonies – I wouldn’t be surprised if they’d completely forgotten your planet, if it weren’t for… you know, _that_ – right now our biggest concern is Fuchsite, you’ve heard of them already, how much do you actually know?”

The two younger gems automatically looked to their mentor. “Not much, by the time we realised they were dangerous, we were knee-deep in a war, I know a little about their history as a scientist, their role developing new gem types, but that’s it. We don’t even know when, or why, they reached out to Obsidian, or how they convinced them to leave us and re-join Homeworld.”

Ametrine frowned slightly, “That brat was a Crystal Gem once? That… actually explains quite a bit. Honestly we don’t know all that much about Fuchsite either, we only met them twice, most of what we know comes from Pyrite, they’ve been working together these last few centuries, planning something big. We can’t give you any details – we weren’t part of the ‘trusted circle’ – but it can’t be good, the creep’s got this obsession with powerful gems, tracking them down and doing... something with them, none of them have been seen again afterwards, except for Obsidian, who’s working as their field agent.”

“Gems have been going missing?”

Smithsonite nodded, then shook her head, raising a hand to rub at her temple. “Not exactly, technically Fuchsite has had them all ‘transferred’ to their research unit, they’re nominally helping them with research, but most of those missing aren’t scientists, or even technicians, they’re soldiers and once they enter those labs they don’t come back out.”

The room went quiet as everyone contemplated the implications of that; Citrine especially was beginning to get an awful feeling about what the scientist’s interest in Obsidian might be.

“So,” Rhodochrosite said, quietly, as though frightened to put whatever was in her mind to words, “they’re collecting exceptional, powerful gems, for some unknown purpose, something worrying enough to make you defect and you needed to stop on Earth to find Bixbite…”

It felt like all warmth had been drawn from the room in an instant, they snapped their head to look at the pair, hoping beyond comprehension that she wasn’t right.

All they needed to see was the white-haired gem biting her lip as she stared blankly into nothing and Ametrine’s clenched fists shaking against their arms. They didn’t stay silent for long, before they’d slammed a palm down on the table and started ranting, though whether it was to the room or themself was unclear, “That damn _bastard_ , I swear if I ever see their face again I’m gonna-”

“Ametrine,” their partner said, resting a hand carefully on their shoulder and shaking her head ever-so-slightly, “it doesn’t really matter anymore, we’re stuck here, so is Bixbite, they were never going to trust us, I don’t know why we ever thought we could save them in the first place.”

“That’s not true!” Citrine’s sudden shout had everyone giving them a strange look, but they powered on regardless, “So what if they don’t like you right now? They didn’t like us at first either but now we’re all friends! If you’d just give it a real shot then I bet you could make up with them too, you obviously care about them a lot, you can’t give up after one failed try.” They could practically feel the fire burning in their own eyes and they were distantly aware that they were starting to glow a faint yellow, but they didn’t care, all they were thinking of was the possibility of caring for some of Bixbite’s old scars.

Smithsonite scoffed at them, her expression already shifting towards anger. “So what, we become friends just in time for Fuchsite to drop by and destroy the whole lot of us?”

Their grin was perhaps a little wild, but a quick glance to their best friend and teacher looking just as excited and confident gave them all the reassurance they needed.

“No, we wait for Fuchsite to drop by so the whole lot of _us_ can destroy _them_.”

\---

In all of the chaos of the last few days – meeting new gems, having their entire life flipped upside down, constant ‘house meetings’ which were really just an excuse for Labradorite to keep tabs on the two newcomers, disguised as making plans for what to do when Fuchsite eventually arrived, trying to keep the peace between them all and the ceaseless, pervasive terror about what was to come and what might happen to their friends – they’d completely forgotten about their plans for the coming weekend.

“Hey, isn’t that festival going to start soon? Shouldn’t you go and find Bixbite, they said they’d go with you, right?”

Rhodochrosite’s words snapped them out of their anxiety-induced haze and back into reality, Citrine blinked at her a few times before her words really sank in, once they did they were on their feet in a flash. “I totally forgot! Oh no, they wouldn’t have started yet would they? What if it’s already over and we missed it-”

She snorted and grabbed their arm to stop their pacing around the living room, “Relax,” she said, giving them her fond smile, “it’s not even five yet, somehow I doubt it would end so early, if you hurry you’ll probably get there before it even _starts_.”

“Yeah, you’re right, there’s still plenty of time, but I’d better go look for Bix now if we don’t want to miss anything!” They stopped at the door to give her a pleading look, “Uh, please don’t tell Lab?”

While they hadn’t actually said they couldn’t go off and do their own thing, their leader had strongly implied that everyone was to be on full-alert and helping to either come up with a game plan or keeping watch of their two… guests; they probably wouldn’t look too kindly on them going off for an evening of fun and games.

“My lips are sealed, now go already!” Citrine ran back to give her a quick hug before darting out into the early evening light.

They were already well past the edge of the forest when the familiar worry started to weigh them down again. Would they still want to go? Would they even let themself be found? Smithsonite and Ametrine showing up had really shaken them, more than they’d ever seen before – even more than when they’d first reformed into a world where there was no more war and everyone and everything they had known was gone – and no one had been able to find them since.

Not that it was unusual for Bixbite to disappear for days at a time, but even when they didn’t want to be found, there’d be signs that they were around somewhere nearby, sand scattered along the ground, the occasional tree shredded down to a smooth stump, the feeling of eyes in the shadows watching your every move.

But, there had been nothing for three days now, only the animals disturbing the underbrush.

All they could hope for was that the redhead would at least come find them, if they were to just go wandering in the forest by themself for long enough.

An hour later and they still hadn’t had any luck.

Citrine sighed as they took one last look around the clearing, there had been no sign of their friend anywhere and with the sky quickly beginning to darken, they were losing hope that they’d ever find them, certainly not today at least.

So, what now? Their mood had dropped so low that they weren’t sure they really wanted to go anymore, but they’d worked so hard just to be given the chance by the townsfolk.

They kicked at a rock and shoved their hands deep into their pockets, _might as well go home_.

The forest was surprisingly loud tonight; they’d never realised how much Bixbite’s presence seemed to subdue the local wildlife, they supposed it was something to do with their predatory aura. Maybe when they finally returned Citrine could try showing them how to approach animals without scaring them off, they bet they’d really like sitting around watching deer and rabbits and birds and-

“-onna be like tha-” Their thoughts were interrupted by the loud, grating voice filtering through the trees. “-don’t you just-”

Citrine paused mid-step and looked around, where had that come from?

“-not making this any-” They spun round until they were facing the direction the voices seemed to be and started forwards, the voices were definitely familiar and getting closer with ever step.

“So, what would be the _easy_ way, huh?” Practically running now, they burst through the dense shrubs to find Pietersite standing in front of the two recent additions to their household, arms crossed and giving their infamous disapproving frown, though all three faces were quickly turned to them as they stumbled to a halt.

Their teacher was the first to respond, “Citrine? What are you doing out here?” they asked, raising an eyebrow expectantly.

“I was looking for Bixbite, what are all of _you_ doing out here, I thought you were going to search the wreckage of their ship, or something?” They pointed towards the other two, who both scoffed in unison; it was actually kind of creepy how in sync they were.

Pietersite shook their head. “We did, it was unsalvageable, we were on our way back when Labradorite… had to be by themself for a while,” their tone and expression were both worried, but Citrine would’ve known what they meant even without it, their other mentor was known to occasionally disappear mid-mission with no warning and no apparent reason, not unlike Bixbite now that they thought about it, “these two decided they wanted to try and sneak off.”

They turned to them, wide-eyed, neither one looked particularly apologetic.

“You make it sound like we were going to try running away to tell Homeworld all your secrets,” Ametrine said, glaring at the older gem.

“Well, what were you gonna do?” Citrine asked.

They turned their glare onto the blond instead, but they met it head on until a hand smacked gently against the back of Ametrine’s head.

“I told you it was a bad idea,” Smithsonite said, tutting at her partner before looking back to the youngest gem, “we were actually planning to do exactly what you were doing. We just thought, since it’s been a few days they might…” She let out a weary sigh.

Ah. They gave the pair an understanding look; it seemed like they really did care about Bixbite, maybe there was still hope for the three to make up and become friends.

Pietersite nodded sympathetically, but still gave them their well-practised scolding voice, “Well, that’s reasonable, but you could’ve just asked,” they said, when the purple gem immediately opened their mouth to make an – undoubtedly sarcastic – retort, they quickly held up a hand to cut them off. “I know that things have been tense between us and Labradorite hasn’t exactly made you feel like we trust you, or that you can trust us, but if we’re going to be working together for the foreseeable future, then we all have to make some compromises. We have to offer you some level of freedom, but you have to show us that you’re not going to betray us at the first opportunity.”

They looked just a little bit shamed at that, but clearly things weren’t going to improve between the two factions unless some drastic action was taken and soon.

“Hey!” Citrine wasn’t quite sure what they had planned to say when everyone’s eyes turned on them, but they were pretty good at improvising, right? “There’s a festival in town tonight, I was gonna go with Bixbite, but I guess they’re not feeling up to it, so how about you go with me?”

Well, at least no one looked angry anymore.

The two gems looked equally confused, giving each other those sideways glances that meant they were having a silent conversation, but Ametrine quickly broke that silence.

“What the heck is a ‘festival’?”

Citrine’s pained gasp could probably be heard all the way back at the house.

\---

She _really_ didn’t get it. It had been explained to her three times now and she still could not wrap her mind around the utterly foreign concept.

“But we don’t need-”

Citrine looked like they were ten seconds from weeping. “Look it’s not because we need to do it, it’s just… it’s nice, food tastes good, I can’t explain it, you just have to try it, gah! You’re even worse than Bix was when I first tried getting them to eat!”

Smithsonite stared down at the bowl sitting on the counter, it was filled with brown water and pale strings and chunks of green, brown and white. She poked at the slop with one of the sticks she’d been given to eat with.

It didn’t look ‘nice’ at all.

“But, what’s the _point_ -”

There was a dull thud as their head collided heavily with the table and they let out a long groan, pulling their hood down until it obscured everything except for a few stray blond strands of hair.

Rhodochrosite shook her head and patted their back gently, before turning to look at her. “You might as well just try it, they won’t stop pestering you otherwise,” she said, giving a look that suggested painful experience.

She frowned and poked one of the amorphous blobs down below the water, grimacing as it resurfaced and didn’t look any better, it actually looked worse somehow.

It wasn’t like she was dismissing out of hand anything these Crystal Gems did. After spending an evening being dragged around this, horrifically insecure, human colony, she’d at least found a few things that were comprehensible, the games that they’d watched the planet’s residents playing were at least _somewhat_ constructive, if trivial and there’d been some kind of performance earlier – clearly some form of human propaganda, though Citrine had referred to it as a ‘puppet show’ – which had immediately caught Ametrine’s interest, but this eating thing was going too far.

“ _Please_ try it, just once! If you don’t like it then you never have to do it again, Bix didn’t like it either, but you can’t stay on earth without trying Ichiraku’s ramen at least once!”

Their voice was high and irritating and everything about their pleading just grated on her nerves, but she was quickly learning that they were nothing if not persistent. Not that that made her any more eager to try it.

A slurping noise to her right had her glancing at her teammate in pure horror, just in time to catch them pouring the entire contents of their own bowl down their mouth.

She didn’t know whether to slap the bowl out of their hands, or press them for a verdict, so she settled for waiting patiently instead; there was no need to lose face in front of these bizarre not-quite-enemies by showing how intrigued she really was.

They slowly lowered the bowl back to the table, their face twisting in all sorts of strange ways, before they finally opened their mouth.

“Eh, that was alright, I guess, don’t get what all the fuss is about though, it just feels weird.” They poked at their stomach as though they could find what they had just ingested into themself through their body. “How long does this last?”

Citrine was grinning so wide and bright, that she couldn’t look directly at them. “A couple of hours, probably.”

They gave a short nod, then turned to their partner with a wicked grin that _always_ spelled trouble.

“Your turn.”

\---


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Y’know I genuinely thought it’d only been like.. a month and a half/two months since the last update? Apparently my perception of time has skewed pretty darn far
> 
> Anyways, really sorry for how long it’s been, but this is a suuuper long chap so hopefully that helps make up for it! And this is actually the penultimate chap too! The end is so close in sight and I’m really excited to get there, dw though there will be a sequel fic coming soon-ish after this one (I’ll probably take a short break from it to work on my other fics and to flesh out the next book’s plan... but then again I have negative levels of restraint so I’ll probably end up starting it before autumn)
> 
> Hope you lovely folks enjoy!  
> -ICTOAN

\---

“I know you’re not telling me something!”

The gem across from her rose an eyebrow, titled her head and crossed her bulky arms, all in one single, fluid movement. “Look, we were sometimes in the same room while our superiors were talking, we went on a few missions together, in which they said maybe ten words to us, none of which more insightful than ‘you know the plan?’, or ‘target acquired’, there’s really nothing more to say.”

Rhodochrosite frowned, having to resist the urge to curl her hand into a fist. She’d not really been expecting anything to come of this, but even so…

“That can’t be it! Ok, maybe they didn’t say anything about themself, but you must’ve noticed something, their expressions, their body language-”

“Oh please,” Smithsonite snorted, “they’re almost as closed off as Bixbite; we never saw them outside of professional situations and no one ever lets themselves go in front of their big boss, now do they?”

She hated that she could feel her cheeks turning even more pink than usual. “Well, it’s ironic that someone with such pretty eyes isn’t very observant,” she snapped.

The other gem didn’t look particularly impressed and she honestly couldn’t blame her – when did her comebacks get so lame? Even if those clear, teal eyes of Smithsonite’s were very nice to look at and good lord she had to stop this train of thought right now.

“Actually I am quite observant; I just don’t like to waste my time on you insignificant runts.”

Her fists were definitely clenched now. “Excuse me?”

Smithsonite’s grin was practically begging her to start a fight. The other gem was testing the limits of her patience, just to see how far this truce of theirs stretched, she knew that, but it didn’t make her any less irritated at the insult to herself and her friends.

She took a deep, shaky breath and very carefully pushed most of her anger into a tight little ball to deal with later, but she reserved a little, just to fuel her retort – even if she wasn’t going to play along like her opponent wanted, didn’t mean she would just throw the match. “You think that just because you’re all tall and have some ridiculous strength, that you’re better than us? Because you… you’re totally not! Any of that!”

Damnit.

\---

They hummed as they carefully peeled away the thick sheet of metal, revealing the mess of burnt-out wires and rusted capacitors.

“Stars, this is a mess,” Ametrine mumbled, poking at a particularly blackened transistor, grimacing as it crumbled into dust at the barest touch, “looks like the whole system was fried, didn’t see any significant damage to the outside though.”

Their companion looked over their shoulder to see for themself – leaning uncomfortably into their personal space in the process. “Probably just a malfunction caused by the chaos.”

The engineer glared at Labradorite’s profile, their single red eye glinting eerily in the low light.

“Yeah, that or sabotage,” they snorted, “an overload completely trashed the power grid, yet somehow the discharge capacitors were mysteriously untouched.”

“The universe does work in mysterious ways.”

Ametrine frowned and roughly pushed them back, so that they could stand back up. “I’m sure it does. Anyways, it doesn’t really matter, this thing ain’t gonna fly again, not unless I tear out the entire propulsion system and make a new one from scratch; the plasma cannon’s in pretty good shape though, we scavenge a reliable power-source and some of the finer components from some other shipwreck and we might be able to make something workable outta this.”

They nodded. “Materials won’t be an issue, finding a power source though…”

“It doesn’t have to sustain full flight, we just need enough juice to get the weapons back online and fire one shot to disable Fuchsite’s ship when it comes,” they kept their tone light and confident, but in the back of their mind they already knew it wouldn’t be so simple.

Things had changed a lot in the past three millennia and, while the Crystal Gems had clearly been surviving well enough during that time, they hadn’t been doing anything. Homeworld on the other hand hadn’t stopped research for even a second since the war ended; if anything, they’d sped up the development process.

Even if they managed to fix up some old weapons, or build some of their own, it wouldn’t be enough. To have any chance at standing up to Fuchsite and whatever forces they brought with them, they’d need the kind of tech that just wasn’t found on Earth.

Labradorite was giving them a strange look again – though with two thirds of their face hidden at all times, it was admittedly quite hard to tell what it might mean – but quickly shrugged and started walking to the ship’s exit. “Well then, if that’s all we need, give me a hand disconnecting the cannon, we can start work on it back home.”

Dark eyes narrowed at their retreating back. “Sure thing,” they said, stepping out of the dank, abandoned cockpit and into the bright afternoon sun.

They scanned the exterior of the small fighter ship one last time. The outer casing was slightly scorched, but intact, if they could just have some time to work on it in private, then they’d definitely be able to get the thing back in the air – at least long enough for them and their teammates to get off this forsaken planet and away from harm.

Slipping away unnoticed wouldn’t be an easy task, but they hadn’t been made head of their fleet’s commando unit for nothing.

And Ametrine knew when to fight and when to flee.

\---

Rhodochrosite and Smithsonite had been sparring for almost an hour now, both panting heavily and covered in dirt, hair sticking up every which way and more than a few nicks on each other’s skin.

But both were grinning, in that wild, determined way that suggested the thrill of a good fight.

Although they’d not been getting personally involved, both Citrine and Ametrine were cheering their respective best friend on, occasionally devolving into playful wrestling matches, only broken up by Pietersite’s reminders to pay attention to the bout and that their time would come.

Labradorite had been quite happy to sit further away, under the shade of the porch, feigning reading one of their many books, but, from the right angle, one could see the way their eyes snapped up to the two combatants with every harsh clang of steel, or rush of wind.

The scene was normal, calm, happy even.

It was wrong.

They couldn’t really define how, or why, but something about the sight made their insides clench, a tightness, a coiled tension that only wound tighter the longer they watched, but for some reason they couldn’t bring themself to turn away, despite every inch of their crawling skin begging them to do so.

Bixbite wished they could talk to their friend about these feelings; Citrine was good at emotions, they’d know what the clenching and the crawling and the dull, heavy ache in their limbs meant.

But, talking to them would require being near the other two and that was simply not an option right now, they were still an unpredictable element and their goals were uncertain, they’d not caused any significant disturbances since their first encounter, but there was no reason to trust them either, they had to be planning something, Pyrite had to be planning something, who knew how long it would be before reinforcements turned up?

And why weren’t the others doing anything about it?

Labradorite was certainly suspicious of them – their eyes never left the pair for very long and they’d been hiding in the nearby forest almost as much as Bixbite was – but they didn’t seem to have any vocal concerns about the two traitorous lackeys in their midst, nor did Pietersite, or Rhodochrosite, as uncomfortable as they sometimes looked around them.

It was even worse with Citrine though, who had welcomed them open-armed and now treated them like old, familiar friends.

The way they’d treated Bixbite.

And something about that gnawed at the back of their mind, even when they weren’t observing the group, when they instead chose to retreat into the forest, or take a warp pad to as far away a place they could find. The thought that Citrine was treating those infiltrators like friends, giving them their trust so easily, so willingly; as though they knew better than the only one who actually knew them, knew what they were like, what they were capable of, how devoted they were to their commander-

Why were they being given such trust, what had they done to earn it and why did it make them feel so much less needed?

And, if they were no longer needed – by Homeworld, by Pyrite, by the Crystal Gems – then what purpose did they have? Citrine had promised to help them find a new one, but now they were too busy with their new friends, the two who were already far more open and friendly than they could ever hope to be, so why wouldn’t they choose Smithsonite and Ametrine over the obsolete weapon?

Sand was quickly starting to swirl around them, tearing at leaves and grating away bark, too much longer and it might become an all-out storm. With a growl, they snapped the flurry to a halt, forced it back into the gourd at their hip and leapt back into the forest.

\---

The fit was snug and there was little of use in the tiny, square room, but it was a space that was purely theirs and that was all they needed right now.

“At least it’s not as cramped as that escape pod, amiright?”

Smithsonite scoffed and casually kicked her teammate – their head immediately knocked into the wall with a dull thud. They might’ve fallen over if there’d been enough space, as it was they just ended up slouching against the corner, with that always-annoying grin on their face. “The trip wouldn’t have been so cramped if you’d thought to commandeer the bigger pod,” she said, bracing her back against the wall, just in case they were plotting a counter-attack.

There wouldn’t be much room for her to manoeuvre, but luckily that worked both ways.

“Time was of the essence and that was the closest one available, next time I’ll let you choose the escape vessel.” They pulled one of the pillows placed at the end of their two futons – Citrine had insisted on getting them one each, despite Smithsonite’s adamant decision to never let sleep become a part of her life and the room’s stubborn refusal to grow an extra two feet in width – to place behind their back and awkwardly stretched their long legs out, muttering curses as they couldn’t quite lay them straight.

She rolled her eyes and grabbed their ankles, bodily dragging them so they could stretch diagonally across the room. “Honestly, you’re so hopeless.”

Ametrine grinned at her and happily shifted until they were acceptably comfortable, she quickly retrieved her own legs so that they weren’t trapped beneath theirs and instead sat cross-legged in the free corner of the room.

Ok, maybe it wasn’t the perfect setup, but they didn’t really have many options, it was a miracle that their captors had even given them a room of their own, even if they would be unable to do anything productive while in it.

“So, this place is weird, huh?”

“That’s the understatement of the millennium,” she said, half her mind already scoping out the positions of the other gems in the house.

Of course they weren’t truly being given any privacy; they were hostages, maybe they had limited freedom of movement, but there was always at least one of their captors within the immediate vicinity – and up to three more lurking covertly in the shadows and, right now, Pietersite and Rhodochrosite were both chattering in the… what did they call it, a kitchen?

But, at least they could talk for a while, even if they had to keep their voices down.

“Any news on your end?” she asked, her question deliberately vague, though she breathed a sigh of relief when her partner casually waved one of their various gadgets at her, it’s screen showing only a faint, flickering line.

“We’re bug-free,” they said happily, grinning wide and tucked the scanner back into their sleeve.

She frowned and kicked at them again. “Don’t be so obvious, idiot!” she hissed. “Are you sure that thing picks up human tech too?”

“Of course I’m sure, you really think I wouldn’t have tested for that already?” They sounded utterly scandalised.

“I guess not,” she said with a drawn-out sigh, “still, it’s better to be safe than sorry. So, report.”

They sat up a little straighter and their expression flattened – she hated knowing that neither one was likely to ever escape that conditioning, but in a situation like this is was admittedly quite a useful skill.

“Red-eye’s been showing me around some of the Earth wreckages to scavenge what we can, there’s really not much to work with, but I’ve set aside some useful bits and pieces-” they flashed her a quick glance up their sleeve, how they managed to keep so much junk hidden up there she’d never understand “-and I’ve already got a good candidate lined up for repair, I can’t do much while we’re being watched so closely though, at some point I’m going to need to slip away to put the damn thing together.”

Smithsonite nodded, even as she absently stretched her senses to check they were still in the clear. “That’s already more than we expected, how reliable will this ship be if you get the chance to fix it?”

They made a distressingly vague hand gesture. “Ehhh, the exterior’s in great shape, but I don’t know if I’ll be able to recreate all the flight systems with just what we can find on Earth, it probably won’t stand more than one FTL jump before the wiring overloads.”

“One jump… that’d be enough to get out of this system though.” And who cared where they ended up, just so long as they were all together and out of Fuchsite’s range?

Ametrine was clearly thinking along the same lines. “Yeah, if I ever get a chance to work on it,” they stressed, before sighing and giving her serious look that was deeply uncomfortable on their usually so relaxed face. “We’ve still got one other problem.”

Something in her chest clenched at that; she knew exactly what they were implying and it was something she’d been unable to stop thinking about since they first decided to abandon their Homeworld. Bixbite would never agree to come with them so easily and they certainly wouldn’t be able to take them by force, they were too powerful and wild – even if they somehow managed to get them onto the ship, they’d be more likely to just cut their way out, than quietly accept their fate, regardless of how far into deep-space they were.

Of course, they could always try bubbling them, but the likelihood that they’d be able to poof them in the first place was painfully low.

Talking them around would be the only option.

And – though she hated to admit it – talking was neither of their strong suits; they were good soldiers, tacticians, engineers, but sympathetic counsellors they were not. Was there really anyone from Pyrite’s fleet who could claim to be so? The admiral didn’t exactly encourage those skills in their subordinates… except maybe that shy little Fluorite who’d burst into tears if you just looked at her without a big, encouraging smile on your face, but then every ship needed a medic.

She’d always thought that Bixbite was the worst of her comrades for it, they were certainly the least outwardly emotional, or empathetic, or even rational at times, but in all honesty, her and Ametrine weren’t much better.

She sighed and pulled her knees up, resting her cheek against them as she stared blankly at her teammate.

“We really screwed this up, didn’t we?”

Ametrine frowned at her, kicking one of their long legs against her hip. “Don’t go saying things like that now, maybe things haven’t gone like we’d hoped, but it’s way too late to turn back.”

She turned her face to hide the smirk crossing her face, but she couldn’t stop the bitter chuckle that escaped her lips. “You’re terrible at being an optimist.”

She was kicked harder this time, but refused to raise her head.

“Ok, so maybe I don’t actually believe that anything is gonna work out, maybe I wish every day that we could just go back home and let Fuchsite do whatever weird, creepy thing they’re planning for Bixbite and I’m sure that in a month we’ll all either be dead, or else wish we were dead, but I’m not just gonna sit around wallowing in self-pity that whole time either. C’mon Smith, we’ve trained for these kinda situations, this is what we were built for-”

Her glare was sharp enough to cut them off. “No it’s not! We’re trained for missions, strike ops, reconnaissance, sabotage, not… rescue, or hostage situations, or convincing someone who’s sure we hate them that we really do care-” She immediately clamped down on the crack in her voice and wiped her face of all emotion except for the frustration creasing her brow.

Damn it, this was what she was so worried about!

She could barely say out loud that all she wanted was for her old teammate to be safe and happy, that she was scared for what was to come, that, deep down, she knew she didn’t deserve their forgiveness, or even their gratitude, but she’d come anyway, clinging onto a millennia-old wish she’d had when they’d first been told that their small, familiar team was going to be growing and she’d have a new partner to boss around and tease and pick up when they fell…

It shocked her out of her thoughts when a heavy hand grabbed hold of her arm and Ametrine physically dragged her across the small room and into an awkward, cramped hug.

“Yeah, I know that, what I meant was that we’re trained for dealing with complications,” they said, before pushing her back into her corner, she was quick to catch herself before she rammed straight into the wall. “Planning on the fly and adapting to new situations? That’s what we’re good at – and we’re damn good at it – our goal hasn’t changed, we’re here, we’ll win over Bix and then get somewhere safe, so let’s stop all this mopey-doping and start treating this like any other mission, ‘kay? We’ve got this.”

Smithsonite stared in shock for a good minute or so, unable to believe that her slacker teammate was actually the one to be serious about a situation for once.

She snorted and aimed another kick at their face, though her foot was caught long before it connected. “When did you get all sensible and smart?” she asked, jerking her leg forwards enough that Ametrine unintentionally smacked themself in the face.

“Ow! Well since you’re not taking charge for once, someone’s gotta pick up the slack, if you wanna start being the boss again, then I’ll gladly go back to being the gorgeous, glamourous, genius assistant who just makes everything happen,” they said, grinning wider and happier than she’d seen in far too long, even if they were still rubbing their sore nose. It still didn’t make their statement any less irksome though.

“If you’re gonna be like that then you can get out, this is my operations room now, you can go do your ‘sleeping’ somewhere else, only serious gems allowed.”

Their eyebrows were waggling in a deeply distressing manner. “Oh? Serious gems like Rhodo-”

She was already grabbing them by their legs and hauling their uncooperative lump of a body to the door. “Get! Out!”

\---

It was definitely awkward at first – and really, even now it was still pretty uncomfortable – but they were starting to adjust to this new pace of life surprisingly well. The things they were doing were certainly nothing like they’d been used to back on the ship and it was strange not having any well laid-out goal to work towards, but the weird friendly one’s goal to show them every single thing that Earth had to offer was keeping them too busy to really think about anything else.

And it was even kinda fun, some things were still utterly baffling to them, but they’d quickly gained an appreciation for some of these human things – they were particularly fond of sleeping and eating had been slowly growing one them – even Citrine’s boundless energy and persistence was charming, in its own way.

At least for a while.

“So, what else can we show you? Have you tried swimming yet? What about painting, that’s pretty fun, or… oh! We should definitely teach you some sports, humans love them and they’re really fun and they’re group activities, so everyone can get involved!”

Citrine was giving them that wide-eyed, hopeful stare again; yesterday they might’ve gone along with it, but right now they were just exhausted; luckily they weren’t the only one feeling that way.

“No, no more,” Smithsonite growled.

“C’mon, there’s still so much of Earth that we need to show you; all the cool things to do and awesome places to see and people to meet and-”

A heavy fan dropped onto ceramic tile – retreating to the roof hadn’t kept them hidden for very long – probably cracking something judging by the noise. “No, more.” Smithsonite’s words were calm, but she was using the same tone she’d use to scare disrespectful recruits into line, Ametrine inwardly smirked at the shudder that rippled through the annoying blond’s entire body.

Finally, they relented, slumping down and pouting. “So, what are we gonna do then?” they asked, a whine creeping into their voice.

“Do we have to do something?” Ametrine mumbled out. “Can’t we just… not do something. For a few hours. Or weeks.”

Citrine sounded utterly scandalised, “No way! Even if we’re not going anywhere, or doing something active, how could you just do nothing at all?” They were once again trying to insert themself into Ametrine’s line of sight; they pushed them back with a snort.

What were the chances that they’d just leave to pester their friends instead? Not likely, besides, as genuine as their friendliness seemed, they weren’t willing to overlook the possibility that they’d been tasked with keeping an eye on the two. It would only make sense, they could keep the pair busy and distracted, while the less noticeable members of their team watched from the shadows.

They let out a sigh and glanced around for something they could use as an excuse.

“Well, how about we just… watch the stars for a while?” they said, staring up at the vast void of space.

Smith gave an approving hum and dissipated her weapon with a casual flick of her hand, already shifting to settle more comfortably next to them, Citrine made a noise somewhere between confusion and excitement.

“Yeah, ok then! That sounds fun,” they said, flopping down onto their back.

Finally, a little peace and quiet, they thought, crossing their arms behind their head, eyes scanning across the glittering map of the cosmos laid out before them. They thought they’d finally escaped the interrogation, perhaps they could finally get some more of that sleep thing, not that they really needed to of course, but it had turned out to be a very enjoyable activity, even if Smith scoffed at them every time they closed their eyes to nap.

But, then the irritation started up again.

“So, do you know what stars these are? Have you ever been to them? What about other planets? How many have you been to? What’re they like? Are they more like Earth, or Homeworld? Are there other aliens out there?” Citrine’s chipper questioning was inexplicably grating.

As tempting as it was to just let them keep going until Smithsonite inevitably snapped – which wouldn’t take very long, her fingers were already drumming harshly against the roof tiles – they figured that they should probably try and keep things civil. “Why are you even so interested in all that, you’ve been in space before, you know what it’s like,” they mumbled, opening one eye to glance at the young gem.

They looked surprisingly uncomfortable. “Well, kinda… but I’ve only ever seen Earth. And Homeworld too I guess, but I never got to go anywhere outside the kindergarten and that was ages ago, I don’t even remember much of it.”

“Ah, you were commissioned for the war then?” Smithsonite asked, her voice softer than she’d ever normally allow.

They couldn’t blame her; it was always sad to think of all the gems who’d been thrown straight into a war the second they emerged from the ground.

“Ehh, not quite.” Citrine chuckled, slowly sitting up once again and rubbing at the back of their neck. “I think I was made a little while before the rebellion started, but I was a prototype, so they never let me leave the lab, not until things started going south on Earth at least.”

Shock jolted Ametrine straight out of their half-asleep state. “Wait, a prototype… you’re from omega?”

“Yup, just like Bixbite!” They sounded far too happy about that fact.

Nothing about that wretched place was something to be proud of; it wasn’t like the other kindergartens, it was a place where scientists threw all their weird, dangerous science at the wall, just to see what stuck, regardless of safety, or legality, or ethics. Sure, it was important for gemkind as a whole and it had produced some outrageously powerful gems, but it’d never been a place one ever wanted to think about – certainly not now that Fuchsite was in charge.

Smithsonite was clearly thinking the exact same thing. “Seriously? But you’re so… you.”

“That’s what they said too!” they said, snickering quietly to themself before their expression dropped, “Not all of us are the same though, I know what my time there was like, but things were probably different for Bix, so of course we’d turn out different, I’m sure anyone who came after me probably had a really different experience too.”

“That makes sense I suppose,” she sighed, “still, it’s strange, I never thought we’d ever meet another gem from that place. Small universe, I guess.”

“Yeah,” they said, turning their gaze to the vague shadow of the forest around them.

They all fell into an uncomfortable silence, Citrine staring off into the dark and Smithsonite and Ametrine having a silent conversation, communicated entirely through raised brows and biting of lips and jerking of heads.

What should we do?

Nothing, we can’t even be sure they’re telling the truth.

But, if they’re actually from omega…

Just how badly had they misjudged these Crystal Gems? Clearly they weren’t the dangerous, uncaring rebels, who would shatter any gem on sight just to protect their precious Earth, who desired chaos and destruction above all else.

Homeworld wasn’t without its issues – the fact that power-hungry radicals like Fuchsite and Pyrite were given any level of authority was proof enough of that – but the system they had worked, if it weren’t for the dangerous conspiracies of a select few, they never would’ve considered abandoning their home and people. The empire was expanding, their population was growing, they were uplifting galaxies with gem culture, why would anyone ever want to destroy any of that?

The rebels were anarchists; they would rather turn against their own kind, than live to serve a greater purpose.

So, why did life here on Earth, among these rebels feel so much… fuller?

Had Bixbite discovered this too?

“Man, it's been so long, I hope they're ok, I mean I know they can look after themself, but I don't like the thought of them being all alone when they're still so shaken up,” Citrine said, blinking out of their forlorn staring into pitch black.

It was jarring to have the silence broken, but Ametrine was actually glad to hear the irritating little runt’s voice; they weren’t sure they wanted to see how deep that well of thought might go.

They shrugged – not that it showed very well with them lying down as they were. “Looks like they haven’t changed all that much, they always used to disappear for days at a time, at least when we weren’t needed for a mission,” they snorted, remembering how furious Pyrite would get at that, “we still have no idea how they managed to hide on the ship, it’s not like they could go anywhere, even when we searched it top to bottom, we never figured out where they were hiding.”

“Probably because they didn’t want you barging into their hiding place with them every time you neglected to tell the pilots you’d made an ‘improvement’ to the ship,” Smithsonite said, lightly kicking them in the side.

Citrine snickered at them as they swatted blindly for her head. “Yeah, they still like to disappear every now and then, but they really have changed! They kinda hated us at first, but now they don’t glare at me if I call us friends and they’ll try new things at least once, even if they don’t end up liking it and they seem to really like sparring with Rho, though those two get kinda… scary, so you don’t wanna try and get in the middle of it, but they both apologised after so it’s all good, they do want to be friends, I know they’re really trying, they need more time, but they’ll figure everything out soon, I know they will!”

They both stared as the young gem nattered on about all the tiny little changes in Bixbite’s behaviour. A quick glance to their teammate confirmed they were both thinking the same thing; the way they were talking about Bixbite was almost… cute.

The blond’s rambling came to a slow halt and they sighed, as they flopped back to stare at the stars once more. “I just really thought they’d have shown up by now.”

Something in their eyes was too miserable for Ametrine’s liking.

“…Hey, so what was that sports thing you wanted to show us anyway?”

Citrine started to literally glow with excitement.

\---

The air was bitter and cutting as it rushed past them, but that was always the case with Smithsonite’s wind. It was just as much a weapon as her fan itself, more so even; the slightest breeze turned to a deadly blade in her hands, they’d seen soft caresses of wind that slit throats, felt the punch of an arrogant snort that knocked them across the room.

So, even though the wind was gnawing at their skin and ripping at their hood so violently that they’d given up trying to keep it on, they didn’t focus on it.

It was probably for the best anyway, they had to keep their eyes open and really didn’t need some flapping cloth distracting them.

There was another grunt behind them as Smithsonite swiped her fan again, sending the second fan she’d summoned – the one they were both riding on right now – lurching forwards so fast their vision blurred for a second. Ametrine carefully gripped the metal edge of their seat tighter, keeping their head down and sharp eyes darting across the landscape flying past below them, looking for anything different, destroyed, out-of-place…

Something shone in the morning light, they waved a hand behind them to smack at their partner’s leg, wordlessly pointing to the distant edge of the forest where green and gold merged, before once again tightening their grip, just as they leapt forward again, at a new angle and far faster this time.

They’d been waiting for this for far too long, they weren’t going to waste a second now.

“Please tell me you’ve got something prepared?” they asked, having to shout over the gale blowing past their ears.

When they didn’t get any response, they had to glance back to try and read her lips, but she was just silently shaking her head, back turned as she swung her fan once more. Ametrine frowned, but turned back to see the patch of glittering gold quickly drawing closer.

They sighed and once again shouted behind them, “Don’t worry about it! We’ll figure something out.”

Probably.

Her response was so quiet; it might as well have been whispered from a mile away. “Hopefully.”

They snorted at how similarly their minds ran, before the sudden absence of pain grating away at their face jerked them back into the mission at hand.

“See anything?” Smithsonite asked, crouching next to them to study the large clearing; an almost perfect circle of lush, green leaves, completely filled with dark, foreboding sand. Even so high above it and with no movement more threatening than a gentle scattering of sand caught in the breeze, they couldn’t stop the slight shudder, or the uncomfortable prickling at the back of their neck.

They shook their head. “Not from here, everything’s… calm. Almost too calm, could be a trap.”

“No,” she said quickly, “that’s not their style and they can’t have changed that much, we don’t even know if they’re here or not, let’s just get down there and look for any clues to where they might be.”

“And if they are down there?”

Her long silence spoke volumes. “No sudden moves, no raised voices, we stay calm and just talk,” she eventually said, before giving them her sharpest glare, “and I know it’s just your nature to be a petulant little brat, but do try to not antagonise them, ok?”

“That’s funny, coming from the one who got a sand-blast to the face for saying ‘Hello’.”

Smithsonite’s eyes could probably melt steel – luckily for them they weren’t made of anything so fragile.

“Actually, how about you just don’t say a damn thing and I’ll do all the talking,” she said, pinching their arm before jumping to her feet and staring down at the clearing, closing her eyes as she took a slow, deep breath. When she opened them, they had changed, not literally, but the set of them was the one that meant all joking was to stop immediately, they had a mission to complete and failure would not be tolerated. “I’m taking us down.”

They nodded, making sure they kept their balance, as the makeshift platform gently drifted to the ground.

Down here, the wind was warm and gentle, the sun was softened by the tall trees on all sides of them and the sand – more of a golden brown than the pale tan they were more familiar with, probably from the rock and soil that it was ground from – crunched lightly underfoot, already packed down enough that they didn’t sink in at all, like walking on stone.

And absolutely no sign of any living being.

Ametrine wanted to sigh in relief, but instead they glanced around, searching for any trace of their long-lost teammate.

It was eerily quiet with wind no longer roaring around them. Unlike the forest closer to the Crystal Gem’s base, here there were no singing birds and yapping animals, no distant hubbub from the human town, no loud bickering between Citrine and Pietersite or Rhodochrosite, no humming machines filtering through thin walls, this whole area was just… empty. Silence and stillness and stone-hard sand.

No sign of Bixbite and going to the edge of the clearing – where sand retreated back into soil and grass – only revealed a tangled mess of footprints that led in every direction, some deep, some shallow; clearly this was a place they frequently came back to, but with so many paths they could follow, who knew where they were right now.

A light tap on their shoulder almost made them jump out of their skin, but Smithsonite didn’t look offended at least.

“No luck?” she asked, though her voice made it clear she already knew the answer.

“No,” they said, giving one set of footprints a last scrutinization, before giving up with a sigh, “this must be some kinda base for them though, our best chance to find them, would just be waiting for them to come back.”

She nodded, but her frown didn’t lift at all. “We don’t know when that’ll be, or if they’ll even come back with us here and there’s the others to think about too; Citrine might not be the brightest but they won’t be fooled by those dolls you left in our b- Ah!”

Smithsonite didn’t get to finish her sentence; two pillars of sand rose up beneath her, engulfing both her arms before hardening, even as she struggled against them, growling deep in her throat.

They might’ve tried to pull her free if their own body hadn’t also been imprisoned by ropes of sand – stronger than any steel – snapping around their limbs, grip tightening even further with every reflexive jerk they made. A heavy fear settled in their belly; despite the five thousand years they'd gone without the ever-present sense of danger that followed their old teammate like a shadow, cloaking them, making the small figure loom large in the minds of everyone nearby, even their most tranquil moments… the old terror engulfed them into darkness, comfortable only in its familiarity.

But this could only be a good sign. If Bixbite had wanted them gone they would’ve made their surprise attack one to destroy their bodies, not restrain them.

Glancing around still revealed nothing, but they had to be somewhere nearby-

In the centre of the clearing sand started shifting and bubbling, something pushing up from beneath the surface, growing and erupting over just a few seconds, leaving them staring into the cold, hard, green glare of their former teammate, sand trickling off their form as they slowly folded their arms, fingers visibly digging into their arms.

Perhaps it wasn’t that great a sign.

Bixbite’s eyes narrowed as they took slow, measured steps forwards. “You’ve lost your edge,” they said, their deep voice reverberating throughout the area unnaturally, “did Pyrite truly expect you to best me?”

“How many times are we gonna have to tell you they had nothing to do with this before you believe us?” they snapped – even Smithsonite’s hissed warnings to stay calm not enough to stop them.

“If not for them, then what possible reason would you come?” Their eyes were practically slits by now, voice already losing its calm tone for one more animalistic.

They had to be careful how they played this; Bixbite was volatile at the best of times and deeply untrusting, especially so whenever the being who’d ordered their creation came into the picture. If the pair wanted to convince them that they really were on their side, then they’d have to work around millennia’s worth of betrayal and abuse from their commanding officer and millennia’s worth of them both looking the other way, trying to convince themselves they were powerless to step in.

Smith didn’t look like she had any better answer than they did.

“We…” she started, glancing around as though something in the environment might inspire her, “were worried-”

Bixbite’s snort was unusually expressive for them – just how much had being around these Crystal Gems changed them? – but they quickly regained their expressionless mask. “Where was that concern five thousand years ago? When the war ended, did you even come and look for me? And even before then, where was your concern when it might have helped?”

They’d never seen their closest friend look so defeated, she wasn’t even getting angry like she usually did when confronted, she was just letting herself hang limply, held up only by the sand still encasing her arms.

“Look, believe us or don’t!” Ametrine snapped, it was never a good idea to get angry around them, but it was unfortunately the only way they could ever push past their fear. “I know there’s nothing we can say that could ever make you really trust us, but at least listen to what we have to say, after that, if you decide we’re lying, then… whatever, we’ll leave and never bother you again.” They could feel the sweat dripping down their neck, as the sand coiled around them squeezed marginally tighter and tighter with each second Bixbite stayed silent.

Those hard, green eyes were barely visible with how darkly they were glaring. “Then speak.”

It was too soon to let out a sigh of relief – and there wasn’t much breath left in their lungs anyway – but they felt at least a little calmer, so did Smithsonite from the way she quickly snapped back into focus.

She straightened up as much as she could. “Do you remember Fuchsite?” she asked, quickly continuing when Bixbite gave a short nod, “Well, they’re planning something big with Ad- Pyrite, we don’t know what, but we know that they’ve recently turned their attention to Earth, more specifically, you.”

They frowned in confusion, taking a calculated step forwards. “Why me? I don’t remember ever interacting with them directly.”

“We’re not sure,” she said, finally starting to look angry again, though Ametrine was sure it was more at their own lack of knowledge than at their teammate, “but they are very interested in collecting powerful gems, anyone who came from the Omega Kindergarten would be high on their list.”

Bixbite’s eyes widened into an expression that seemed surprisingly… nervous? “Om-”

“Ahhh!” The screech cut through their whole body, Ametrine’s gaze automatically snapped to their partner, already feeling that terrifying tightness in their body, almost too scared to see, but she was giving them the exact same look of confusion they were probably giving her right now.

“Bix! You’re heeeere!” Oh. Citrine had somehow managed to skid to a halt just before slamming into their friend – even they must’ve known that wouldn’t have ended well for them – but they were still bouncing around them wildly, arms flailing and tears running down their face, they seemed to be only barely holding themself back from just jumping on them. “It’s been so long I was getting kinda worried I’m so glad that you’re ok- oh and YOU!” They spun around to face the two still trapped in sand, accusatory finger already pointing hard. “Who’d you think you are sneaking off like that? Do you know how much trouble I’m in if anyone else finds out? Oh my stars, what if they already know? Ohh no, they already know, what do I do, Pietersite is gonna kill me!”

By this point they’d crumpled to a quivering heap on the ground, arms wrapped around their head as though one of their comrades would come leaping out any second.

Ametrine rolled their eyes so far back they could probably see the inside of their own head. “Uh yeah, I don’t think you’re the one who gets to worried about being killed right now,” they said, pointedly kicking at their prison.

Three almost identical glares were levelled at them, though only Bixbite’s really worried them.

“Hey, don’t say things like that! Bix isn’t gonna do anything to try and poof you, right?” the blond said, with a look of such sincere faith, that it even seemed to catch Bixbite off-guard, judging by how wide their eyes were and how the sand trapping their arms loosened all of a sudden. They struggled to resist the urge to break free while they were distracted; it would likely just make things more painful for them later.

There was a terrible silence as Bixbite seemed to be battling between their ingrained habits and hate of their old teammates, and the trust of their new, weird friend.

Eventually, their weird friend won out and they were finally released from their sandy tombs, though they didn’t look all that happy about it. Ametrine immediately shook out all their limbs and took a few wary steps back, Smithsonite did much the same.

“There, see? We can all get along and not attack each other,” Citrine said with their obnoxiously chipper tone, “so how about we all go back to the house and pretend that no one slacked off on their guard duty and no one ran away and we spent all day playing cards so Labradorite doesn’t get mad at us!”

They couldn’t believe this. “Wait, wait, so you’re just… gonna let us get away with this? Even though we’re not supposed to go anywhere unsupervised?”

“Of course! You just wanted to talk to Bix, what’s wrong with that?” they asked, apparently genuinely confused as to why there would be a problem. “Besides, I don’t wanna sit through another one of Pietersite’s lectures.”

As they were still trying to wrap their heads around that, Bixbite had already spun on their heel and was walking purposefully away.

“Ah, wait,” Citrine called after them, “you… you’re not gonna disappear for a really long time again, are you? I- I mean I won’t try and stop you or anything, but I just really missed you and I wanna talk to you again, but if you don’t want th-”

“I will let you find me, but not them,” they said, sending one last, cold-sweat inducing, glare over their shoulder.

As they disappeared in a gust of sand, Citrine turned to them with a heavy sigh. “Well, at least you’re not trying to kill each other anymore, right?”

\---

Labradorite wasn’t sure how long they’d been wandering, the sky was significantly redder than it had been when they first arrived at the sprawling field of grass, rolling hills and roaming sheep, but that only told them that it had been a few hours at the least, or possibly a lot longer. It was entirely probable that they’d managed to miss the passage of a few days in their trance-like state – it wouldn’t be the first time.

They sighed and slowed to a halt, for the first time in however long they’d been here.

Coming back to the present was always a slow process for them; though the phantom sights and sounds had finally faded away – and they were once again reasonably confident that everything around them was pure reality and not the conjuring of their distressed mind – they still felt… wrong, just slightly off-balance, not enough to inconvenience them, but enough that they were always too aware of their body and surroundings, like they would once again tumble back into their hallucinations if they stopped concentrating for a single second.

So they wouldn’t go back home just yet, maybe a quick trek up these last three hills, before heading back to the warp pad.

They still felt a little guilty over how little time they’d spent with the others lately, but with all the new gems entering their lives, the memories that they could normally suppress were becoming more and more insistent in forcing their way to the forefront of their mind and the longer they were away, the more they dreaded coming home to Pietersite’s understanding, but troubled, look.

Eventually they were going to realise that Labradorite wasn’t worth their worry, that they were never going to get better and eventually Labradorite wasn’t going to be able to keep their feelings hidden anymore.

And they weren’t ready to face that rejection.

Trying vainly to push their dark train of thought away, they crested the tallest hill on the moors, the view from the top was beautiful; grass turned almost golden in the sunset light, juts of rock dotting the landscape, a few dilapidated human constructions hidden in the valleys between sheer stone and sloping mound, there were a lot more clouds than they got back home, but they broke up the wide expanse of red and orange, into something much softer - they’d always been quite fond of cloud-covered skies.

But it wasn’t any of that that caught their eye, beautiful as it was. It was the small, dark, nondescript bump a few hills over, it could be easily mistaken for a rock, if only they weren’t so hyper-aware right now.

Labradorite’s feet were leading them towards it, even before their mind had come to the same decision.

\---

They’d quite honestly expected that once they got there, there would be no sign left of the anomaly, but as they casually walked the last few feet to their target, ducking under the rocky overhang, into the cave-like shelter, there it still was. They’d not bothered to conceal their approach, it wasn’t likely it would’ve worked, even if they had.

Bixbite gave only the slightest flicker of their eyes to acknowledge their presence, before going back to staring out at the moors.

Not much of an invitation, but they decided to settle down next to them anyway – keeping a fair distance between them, so that if things turned sour there’d be room to manoeuvre. But their company seemed relatively calm today, so they felt good about their chances.

“So, you come here often?” they asked, tone light and playful, even if Bixbite would never pick it up.

“No.”

They hummed and shifted into a more comfortable cross-legged position. “That’s a shame, the views here are wonderful, don’t you think?”

“Why aren’t you with them now.” It wasn’t a question, but an accusation. Sharp, green eyes turned to them, but the rest of their body stayed perfectly still, it was unnerving how they did that, but the effect was probably unintentional.

Labradorite briefly considered dancing around the question, the way they usually did, as playing around was so much easier than being honest, but in the end, they decided against it, this was not a person who’d appreciate games. “I was in a bad frame of mind, needed to be alone for a while; in that state, I’d only be a danger to them,” they said, shooting Bixbite a gentle smile, “I’m sure you know what I mean.”

That glare would probably be enough to scare off a lesser gem, but they were far beyond caring about threats against themself.

“I was not aware you had so little self-control.”

“And I didn’t know you cared so much. My, my, look at how much we’re both learning today!” They pointedly ignored the sound of sand starting to churn inside the small gourd strapped to Bixbite’s hip.

Neither one spoke for a long while, choosing instead to stare intently at the sight before them – the sun was almost fully set now, only a sliver of red sky visible at the horizon.

They weren’t quite sure what they’d expected to happen by going to speak to Bixbite, really the fact that they’d even let themself be found was confusing, it’d been clear from the start that their distaste for each other ran deep, far deeper than with anyone else. Obviously Labradorite knew why they were distrustful; they still saw echoes of a deadly wave of sand engulfing their beloved friends, almost every single day and even if they ignored that, Bixbite was an unpredictable element, they had quietly accepted by now that they weren’t going to turn on them any time soon – at least not with Citrine determined to become their best friend – but that didn’t mean they couldn’t be prepared, just in case they did.

And to be fair, they’d not done much to hide that, so the redhead being cautious around them was partially their own fault.

Still… perhaps they’d not been giving them enough credit.

“You know, I think it’s about time you came out of hiding,” they said, keeping their eyes fixed on a rock in the distance, “Citrine’s been worrying about you, it’s actually quite annoying.”

Even without looking at them, Labradorite could feel the suspicious eyes boring into the side of their head. “…You know the reason those two came here.” They had to take a second to shift to the abrupt change of topic, but once they had, gave a confused nod. “Then why would you leave them alone?”

“They aren’t alone, Pietersite, Rhodochrosite and Citrine are keeping an eye on-”

“Not them,” they snapped, finally letting something like frustration slip into their voice, “Citrine, why aren’t you watching them?”

They raised a white brow in question, watching in fascination as Bixbite became the most… normal-looking they’d ever seen them – hands clenching and unclenching, feet jittering as they brought their knees up to their chest, frowning less with rage than anxiety.

“If Fuchsite comes here looking for powerful gems- for Omega Kindergarten gems…”

Oh. They shouldn’t have been that shocked, really, they knew about Citrine’s history – hard as it was to reconcile the image of the childish, naive, ray of sunshine incarnate with the knowledge that they were a powerful, experimental gem, who’d once been highly valuable to Homeworld – and once they heard that the old snake was looking for gems to increase their own power, their mind had immediately started to worry about those closest to them, but they hadn’t expected the same of Bixbite.

Apparently, they were terrified, not for their own safety, but for the safety of their first, and possibly only, friend. Labradorite wasn’t quite sure what to do with that knowledge.

They put on the most reassuring smile they could muster. “Don’t worry so much, look, you’ve never really fought with them – not in your right mind at least – so it’s understandable, but they are actually very strong, no, really!” They couldn’t help but chuckle at the sceptical look levelled at them. “They managed to bring your corrupted form down by themself and they didn’t just sit around offering moral support during the rebellion, they were out there, fighting alongside the rest of us, in fact they were among our best combatants, so you don’t have to worry about them not being able to fight.”

Bixbite gave them a hard, scrutinising look, as though trying to catch them out in a lie.

Now was probably not the time to mention their reckless disregard for their own safety when it came to protecting their precious friends – no need to make the kid worry.

“Though perhaps you should be a little concerned about yourself, you’re the main target as far as we know and if you got hurt then that really would cause Citrine a lot of pain,” they said instead, already having horrible visions of the look of the blond idiot’s face, should their crush be harmed in any way.

Said crush didn’t quite seem to get what they were implying though. “Why would the pain of another being cause them harm?” they asked, frowning as they tried to puzzle though it.

Labradorite laughed, not even stopping for the glare sent their way, between their snorts, they managed to find enough air to speak, “Wouldn’t you say that you were doing the same thing just now? The thought of Citrine in danger upset you, right? It’s the same way for them, or anyone who cares for someone else, really.”

“I…” Bixbite’s eyes were wide, their jaw hanging slightly open. Seeing them like this made the older gem wonder how they’d ever found something to fear in the first place.

They seemed to close in on themself for a short moment, their hand drifted to their chest, clutching at the cloth covering it. “This… caring, Pietersite told me about something like this once, it… is this what love is?” they asked, looking more terrified and open than they’d ever seen before.

“Hmm, perhaps, I can’t speak for your own feelings, but I am very certain that Citrine loves you.”

It was almost comforting to see the realisation slowly blooming on their face, were their eyes starting to water there? “Loves me… the way that Junko loved Tadashi?”

They snorted at the familiar reference and nodded – of course Citrine had shown them their favourite sappy romance film.

“And the way that Pietersite loves you?” Ah, now they were getting the hang of-

Wait, what?

“…E-excuse me?” they just about managed to stutter out, right now they must’ve looked as utterly shocked as Bixbite had a few moments ago; where had they heard such nonsense? Pietersite certainly cared about them, but they cared about everyone!

The redhead frowned again, more confused than angry. “They said that they found you ‘appealing’, have I made the wrong connection? In the context of the conversation about romance-”

“No, no I… I think you might be right there, um, well now, you really don’t know how to keep a secret, do you?” The baffled expression they got in response might’ve been funny at any other time. “But, yes, I suppose it’s similar to how Citrine feels about… You know, I think I should go home right now!”

Yes! Home! Where there was a very handsome gem who apparently liked them quite a bit more than they’d been led to believe, when did they get so unobservant?

Bixbite was still giving them a very odd look, even as they gave a jovial wave and hopped off the edge of the rocky outcropping they’d been seated on and started running full-speed straight towards the nearest wrap pad.

Five thousand years of reliving distant, painful memories and for the first time, they found themself looking forwards, with a hope that they’d thought long-since extinguished.

\---

**Author's Note:**

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